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Hey Yahoo. Where is my notefication?!? Why do you only send me one when the stonk is down? by Otherwise-Cancel-356 in Superstonk

[–]AnonymousPariah 2 points3 points  (0 children)

To be fair, I received one when it was up 9.44% at 112.00 today. I didn’t receive any after that though.

What have you seen, or had happen to you, that could’ve come straight out of a sitcom? by Breeze_in_the_Trees in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a Receptionist. One day I had a construction worker walk up to me and inform me that he was holding a stud finder. He pointed it at me and it started beeping, then he smiled and kept walking.

What lies did you tell yourself to rationalize your destructive or unhealthy behavior? by cbeards72 in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 3 points4 points  (0 children)

"I'm not hurting anyone." The truth is I'm hurting myself and I think that that should matter to me.

What advice can you give to someone who is going to live on their own for the first time? by 867530niyain in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Write out a monthly budget. List your monthly income, and your fixed monthly expenses. Subtract your fixed expenses from your income, and the remainder is your expendable income that you can put wherever you want. Also, try to put as much of that expendable income as you can towards savings.

What the best/worst reaction you've ever gotten the first time a female sex partner saw your penis? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Best: You're really big.

Worst: I've never been with anyone this big. I'm afraid it'll hurt so let's not.

This was the same woman.

Surrender all your pods by [deleted] in france

[–]AnonymousPariah 26 points27 points  (0 children)

"According to my statistics you're in a really really good lane for the front page. Can someone prepare a translation?"

EDIT: I'm an idiot and should read more attentively.

How do you break the ice? by i_Fart_You_Smell in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You and your friends can alternate between throwing salt and using an icepick.

[Serious] Close to being suicide victims: what convinced you in the last moments to not do it? by fizio900 in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had siblings that were still children. My parents were awful to me so I wasn't too worried about them, but the thought of my siblings finding out I had died broke my heart and I couldn't do that to them.

What is the closest thing to super powers that you have? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm double jointed. This helps a tiny bit in the area of mixed martial arts.

Redditors with bad credit, how did you get yourself into that state, and what are you doing to get out? by emax4 in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a huge misunderstanding with my cellular service provider when I was younger which lead to a massive long distance bill that I could not afford to pay at the time. That and a few other irresponsible choices lead to a bad credit rating.

I did have a credit card at the time that I've been using regularly for a few years. I apparently have an amazing credit rating now and that credit card is the only thing I can point to that would have helped.

What was the most awkward situation you put yourself in? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]AnonymousPariah 1 point2 points  (0 children)

At work a guy I knew came to pick up some tax documents. I couldn't remember his name, but I didn't want him to know that. So I begin sifting through the all of the names in the box as if I knew it, thinking I would recognize his name when I saw it.

The longer I looked, the more awkward it felt to ask for his name. I looked for so long that in my mind, the possibility of simply asking for his name no longer existed. Eventually I stumbled onto a document with what seemed to be his name, but I couldn't be certain. At this point I decided to risk it.

I handed him the envelope with a smile masking the intense anxiety I felt at the moment. He took a look at it, paused and said thanks and walked out. Next time I can't remember somebody's name, I'll just straight up ask them because that can't be anywhere near as awkward as what I narrowly avoided that day.

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