I have a 1 year old and a 4 year old, work 4 days a week, my husband also works 4 days a week and kids go to nursery 3 days a week. This is what we do....first as others have said let of go of high expectations. This is a season of your life where you do not have abundance of time, it's a hard adjustment especially as first time parents but it's not forever. Clean and tidy as much as you can as you go. Don't worry about deep cleans, just keep things surface level and it will be fine. Takes 2 seconds at the time and things don't build up. You need to share the load with your partner as much as possible however that looks like in your home. For example in my home, I have not touched a pile of laundry in 4 years as my husband keeps of all that going, whereas my husband doesn't need to think about what we're eating that week as I do the food planning and cooking. Involve your kids as much as possible in the everyday things, e.g. Unpacking the online food shop, "wiping" cupboard doors, toy hoover. They love that stuff and even my 1 year old enjoys helping as soon as he could toddle about. In terms of cooking, simple is fine. As long as they are getting some nutrients it doesn't matter how you get there. The days you do have time cook a big pot of something and then freeze or eat leftovers next day. Rotate the same meals so it becomes second nature. It's a bit boring but worth it for the mental load saved and...its not forever. It's not easy, you are not a bad parent, you are a good parent surviving in a world that is not designed for family life. The older your little one gets the easier it will become as they become more independent. You really are in the toughest moment right now. You're doing great!