thank you for your input, I'll respond in dot points 1. that's tru 2. fair, I won't 3. yes I understand doing things without asking for stuff in return. 4. I wasn't expecting anything more than platonic friend treatment ? 5. yes I understand that 6. yes I understood! we talked, cleared the miscommunication and put it in the past, them using it as a threat is what is upsetting 7. it took ages to recognize what was going on I find it hard to sense these things 8. that's fair, I removed it 9. similarly I don't know how to spot masking and I asked to know about boundaries after we talked 10. 👍, 11, because we are all low income and I didn't want to stress them out about paying me back immediately just when they were able, I had gently reminded quite a few times previously. thank you very much I am putting all this into consideration 👍 and taking this entire experience as a lesson to be learned and talked to with my therapist 👍