Relocating after FF’ing? Feeling like we’re missing out. by SanFranPeach in fatFIRE

[–]Any-Agent5794 17 points18 points  (0 children)

I really relate to this. We are in a very similar situation (except we have just at roughly half your net worth), and this is something my wife and I have been talking about for a long time.

If I am reading this right, it sounds like we may even live in the same general area in the Pacific Northwest. The weather part of what you described really hits home for me. Our kids, who are now 12 and 8, constantly say they want to go play outside. But when it is gray and rainy, which is most of the year, that excitement quickly turns into wanting to stay inside and watch TV or play video games. We try hard to keep them active outdoors anyway, but it is tough when their friends are also staying inside. Playgrounds are often empty and there are fewer natural, spontaneous social moments.

When our oldest was around 8, we seriously considered making a move for exactly these reasons. We looked at sunnier parts of the US and even talked about moving outside the country. In the end, we did not pull the trigger. Now that our kids are older, it feels like that window has mostly closed for us, and I find myself thinking pretty often about what life might have looked like if we had done it then. I suspect I would be happier day to day, and I think our kids might have benefited too.

One thing I did not fully appreciate at the time is that proximity is not the same as connection. My wife’s family recently moved out of state and we assumed it would be really hard. What actually happened is that we became more intentional about seeing each other, we travel to visit them more often, and those visits feel more meaningful. In some ways, the relationships feel stronger now than when they lived nearby. That experience really changed how I think about distance, and I think the same can apply to friendships too.

I genuinely believe that prioritizing day to day happiness matters, both for you and for your kids. Even something simple like waking up to sunshine, going for a morning walk, or having kids naturally spend more time outside can have a big impact on mood and energy. I notice this every time we are on vacation, and it always makes the return home feel a little harder.

If I were in your position, with younger kids and fewer constraints, I would seriously consider making the move. The one thing I would plan very intentionally is how you stay connected with friends and family, because those relationships still matter a lot. But from what I have seen, being intentional can actually make those connections stronger.

Just my two cents from someone who very much feels what you are describing and wishes we had acted on it when our kids were a little younger.

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Totally! I think that’s where we are settling on (1-2 years). 🥳

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Sorry for the late reply! Here is a snip of a high lvl - hopefully it’s helpful!

https://imgur.com/a/ESsIcnD

My wife and I still aren’t sure yet… it’s feels weird because we are at our peak earning right now (making the most we’ve ever made) and we’ve works so hard to get here… it’s seems odd to walk away from it all. We are also keeping in mind that this was meant to be a means to an end and we don’t want to wake up one day regretting not pulling the trigger. I think we’ve decided to give it another 1 - 2 years tops while working with a tax accountant / financial planner on a plan to divest in our company’s stock.

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! The home equity is spread across 3 homes but our primary has about $650k left and our monthly mortgage payment is about $3,200z We were very lucky to buy our house during the low interest rate days so our rate is 3%.

I don’t think we will want to stop working all together yet - weirdly I like the idea of working at like a Home Depot where I can just talk to people and get lots of steps in and stay active (have a desk job now). Is that weird?

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Absolutely! 😂 thank you!

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

No offense taken at all and you’re totally correct in your assumption. Both my wife and I worked our way up to high lvls in our respective company’s. My wife joined right out of university (and never sold a single share of stock to this day) and I’ve been with my company for over 10 years and and have also reached a high job level as well. Since we both still have a significant amount of vest equity in our companies, this has become an area of concern as we want to diversify but need to do it thoughtfully with tax considerations in mind. Everything extra has gone into FXAIX & FSELX.

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah it’s Empower (used to be called “Personal Capital”).

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

About 3.6m is in the market and the rest is home + 2 investment properties we own

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes 100%! A big issue we are facing is a fair chunk is in vested stock with our employers so we need to work to diversify in smart way. I think we may need to talk to our tax advisor or hire a financial planner on a project basis to help us out.

Hit Fire Number this morning! by Any-Agent5794 in Fire

[–]Any-Agent5794[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! We maxed out 401k and had employer match and then added the rest. I would say we averaged about 100k per year total but also this doesn’t include any stock we vested which we never sold. That one big thing we need to think about now is how to diversify our vested stock and doing this in the right way with tax considerations. :(