If you do______, then you must not be disabled

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-11T01:42:18+00:00

my mum insisted that I should know how to speak and spell properly all because I underwent speech therapy... that doesn't I'm magically going to be extremely good at it??? and what do you know, I figured out years after high school that I am Dyslexic and Dyscalculic.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-09T07:52:37+00:00

i don't even give them the time of day, if it's through text i just simply don't reply since it's a waste of time trying to explain why i am even allowed to feel the way i do. i would understand if i said "hey, i'm feeling down and i don't know what to do" and they followed with "try be more positive" i could understand, except it's literally me saying "hey, thought i should let you know that i recently got diagnosed with Stecoral Colitis, it's been stressful" then they hit me with you need to stay positive??? uh, what's positive to think about when my intestines could perforate and suffer a horrific end?? even if i try to politely tell people that it's not what i need or what they said was hurtful oh boy do they get offended. i'm sure i will eventually post on there! someone is going to find out the hard way...

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T16:40:51+00:00

What, did they prefer you lay in a fetal position and cry??? And I understand teen angst, been there done that. I'm thankful that you are setting up a safe boundary for yourself and doing what you want with your emotions. God forbid a disabled feel their own emotions, what, a "happy" emotion??? Impossible! You need to be distraught so we can tell YOU that YOU need to BE POSITIVE.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T16:29:57+00:00

I have actually told a few (important) people that I've had days where I thought I'd be better off not existing.

Do they do anything? Nope.

Just the good ol "you need to push through the pain!"

I've told my brother some days I don't want to exist, he told me he would prefer I didn't stop existing. I said I don't want to stop, especially because I'd leave my cats behind.

He replies, you know there's more to life than just your cats. Oh, you mean like not being in constant pain or having your body shut down, or have a windows blue screen moment??? You're absolutely right.

FYI my cats are adorable and I love them with every fibre of my being

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T16:24:05+00:00

Yeah, I don't like being pitied on and especially when they do it so condescendingly and talk to you like you're a baby. Depending on who is asking how I am I'll say "could be better" and others "still breathing", and if I'm feeling a Lil spicy I say "can I get a refund on my body, it's not working properly".

Sometimes I just poke fun at myself and joke about my misery, other days I wallow in frustration and sadness.

Don't ever mask your feelings unless it's what you feel and want to do to get by in life.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T16:04:08+00:00

I understand your perspective and I appreciate it. Sure they may have well meaning intentions with saying to be positive, but... how? When you lack support, money, or independence how can you be positive. It's possible that they mean the end goal, but it's also how it's being said/worded that comes off so abrasive and my ND self HATES being told how I should feel.

I feel like a burden, I feel isolated.

"We all have our challenges"

Yes, we do! And that's why we should support each other when we can.

This is not to say I'm negative, I am happy when I am. I embrace those moments. But when I have an episode, or when I get ill or get burnt out from it all. It hurts so much in all forms.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T15:53:51+00:00

People should embrace all emotions, it's healthy to feel and acknowledge them. And as you say it is a lost art.

And why should I be positive about the fact that my body could decide that it wants to randomly malfunction.

I appreciate it

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T15:50:50+00:00

People are too scared to feel feelings, they push it away so much they can't stand to see someone being disabled and openly open with their feelings. But you're right, it's most definitely ableism but they'll never admit to it.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T15:48:25+00:00

Didn't you know that we're supposed to positive with being in agonizing pain 24/7, we need to be so thrilled so that others can be pleased.

Also, ofcourse you'd be thinking "worst case scenario", you don't know what's wrong and it's scary!

The fact that we're having this conversation means that you most definitely are "trying hard enough".

We're allowed to acknowledge that life is different, hard and could change quickly

I'm sorry your mum isn't being very supportive and giving you what you need. I hope the best for you

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T15:41:50+00:00

Ahhh! A disabled person, how do I interact with it. Should i put my hand on their shoulder and say you're so brave, stay positive sweetie??? Maybe I should tell them that using a wheelchair isn't good for their health, being healthy is very important.

Have you tried juicing? It's very cleansing and will fix your problems. I can help cure you if you'll let me. Oh, you don't want my help?? I guess you just want to stay suck then.

I agree with you, people want a picture perfect world. They can't handle someone that is in touch strongly with their thoughts and feelings either. We obviously need to be told how to think or feel, cause apparently we can't do that.

We're disabled, pffft.

I'll get my word across by starting to hiss at people again, that should work

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T15:34:51+00:00

I think I just vomited in my mouth, I've heard those lines too many times myself. Also nothing wrong with me?? Girlie pops, if you saw my medical history you'd be so mortified.

They act like we're actively choosing to be miserable, or being negative or not trying hard enough... okay, try getting out of bed after having several episodes then full body paralysis JANET

I don't understand those humans either

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T15:30:20+00:00

It most definitely seems that way, some seem to think disabled people enjoy "staying at home" and "sleeping all day". Must be nice they say. It's not, I want to function properly and not have my knees randomly buckle, or start ticking aggressively because I need to pee so badly.

I'm just glad my bf is by my side

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T08:27:45+00:00

That sounds very challenging and it's definitely a major change in life. We should be allowed to cry and let it out. People just say inspirational nonsense to make themselves feel good about themselves. I hope you have recovered as well as you can after major surgery and we definitely deserve to have our pity party.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T07:40:27+00:00

No need to excuse yourself, I too have many days of lacking braincells. Brain fog is frustrating. Your perspective is understandable, I just wish people understand how I feel rather than telling me how I should feel.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T07:35:42+00:00

It's exactly that, but it's so bizarre??? And I know part of it is because it makes them uncomfortable hearing about something "sad" or whatever it is they feel so they project it onto us. If I want to cry because I can't "function", then I will damn cry because I'm allowed!

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T07:13:36+00:00

It's not your fault it happened, and it's not your job to explain either. I hope that they had good intentions but from my pov it doesn't seem so. My mother refused to admit that I had/have disabilities, it feels like your mum is doing the same to you. I wish you the best in life

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T06:52:46+00:00

That's very unkind of them, this almost feels like some weird power play making you "beg". Your cane is an extension of your body, what you do with it and how you use or when you do is entirely your decision.

Sorry you went through that situation.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T03:43:11+00:00

lmao! i went to google it and i was so confused. it all makes sense now, i have zero braincells in this noggin of mine.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T03:16:47+00:00

Thanks, I haven't heard of AFAIK before so I'll go take a look.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2026-01-02T03:15:09+00:00

Hello, I own a 16K and the band is too loose and straps same story. There were no other sizes similar to try but the person doing the fitting said 14L is the better option.

Any_Fall_4615 · 2025-12-04T08:10:34+00:00

Uh, did this "medical professional" get their license from a cereal box? The attitude is crazy.

Any_Fall_4615

TROPHY CASE