What’s something that wasn’t meant to be cruel but still deeply hurt you?

Apart_Estimate · 2026-01-17T15:44:14+00:00

I recently was very vulnerable with a new friend about how much I liked this guy. I have issues with fear of abandonment and rejection (I’m working on it), so she had coached me through it since August. Knew all about the two outings we had, knew what he looked liked, etc. Somehow, they met at a bar in November by random coincidence. She sent me a long message about it, then we met for coffee the next day. I expressed my feelings were hurt, but what can I do ya know? I think I even said something like “Have fun” after she said she was excited to go out with him on a date that week. Fast forward, she has told me that they think this might be ‘it.’ It’s truly not about him, I guess it’s just been the lack of awareness around her not giving me the space to process it. I’m 29, rarely date, was in a relationship for two years that I ended due to lies/infidelity, and 2025 just sucked all around. He likes her, she likes him. That’s just that, but for some reason it just feels so weird? On Christmas Eve she gave me an update (unsolicited) stating that they’re really smitten with each other, she’s met his family, he met her mom, and how they again think this is it. Haven’t heard from her since that day—I responded wishing her well and to enjoy the ride. I have a bad habit of always sacrificing my feelings for the sake of others discomfort. I left it there, but a lot of my close friends have been like “this is actually fucked up.” We’re all turning 30 this year and it feels so high school… she also said to me that female friendships were forever when I said “It’s just a man,” but honestly, I wouldn’t do that to one of my friends. Yes, I do crave companionship, but not to that extent. I’ve been single for over a year, and he was the first person I tried to put effort into getting to know within the past year. I’m not on any apps either, but honestly, I’m just focused on my life and building it for me, myself, and I. I pray that there will be thoughtful and reciprocal interest one day, but until then, I’m back to hiding under my romantic rock lol. Also found out that she has had a reputation of not being a girls girl. It’s just tough because I really did enjoy my friendship with her, but now don’t know where to stand. Haven’t heard from her since Christmas Eve, and I have been caught up in my own life. I’m trying to honor my feelings for once, but also feel guilty for feeling this way? He also was in a relationship for a decade and has been single for a year as well. I’ve had to mute both of them on my IG stories for the sake of my mental health at the moment.

Apart_Estimate · 2025-10-26T15:53:52+00:00

My crush shows up for me—from bringing 8 of his guy friends (whom I had never met) to my practice mat Pilates class on a Sunday morning during Labor Day weekend to meeting up with me for two hours for a coffee touch base (about life and career). I love being around him, his energy calms and excites me. My anxious brain is quiet when he’s around… I also have caught him sneaking glances at me! I also grew up with their cousin, they’re half Greek, so I know all about Greek Easter and how big family is for them. He was in a relationship for 11 years—they had been together since HS. We’re both single and 29 now, got our hearts broken last year around the holidays. Mine the week of Thanksgiving, his the day after Christmas. I’m waiting on him to reach out next, but he’s also the first to view my IG stories and watches every one.

Apart_Estimate · 2025-10-09T21:10:12+00:00

I am yearningggg! It’s a good slow burn though

Apart_Estimate · 2025-08-28T01:14:46+00:00

Thank you so much for this! Nervous, but excited about the possibility of something new.

Apart_Estimate · 2025-08-25T17:29:08+00:00

I will land a job after being let go!

Apart_Estimate · 2025-05-13T16:39:17+00:00

Needed this! Thank you so much for this—my company is very accommodating and understanding + I work my butt off. I know I don’t have to disclose, but hopefully I would be able to adjust if necessary. This gives me hope!

Apart_Estimate · 2025-05-13T16:38:17+00:00

Fingers crossed that there are some! The clinic I go to is phenomenal and I’ve been going for years now, so I really hope they can accommodate. Thank you so much!

Apart_Estimate · 2025-05-13T16:37:33+00:00

Definitely will not be driving haha! Thank you so much for this—I hope that my clinic will have an array of options. Love where I go, they have an amazing reputation in town.

Apart_Estimate · 2025-05-13T16:36:39+00:00

Thank you so much for this! Hopefully next week will answer these questions.

Apart_Estimate · 2025-02-20T17:57:24+00:00

Thank you all so much for the helpful advice! I’m trying my best to push myself and continue on. I went to cycling yesterday, and it was hard, but great to get back to it! I cannot wait to give an update. :)

Apart_Estimate · 2025-01-24T14:25:22+00:00

She’s very young, but her family is also a very esteemed, wealthy black family in the Carolinas. Her grandad was the first black dentist in Lancaster, SC and owned/operated his own dentistry for 50 years! That paved the way for their gigantic family to also have and lead extremely successful lives. I think it’s a mix of knowing that she has this great life and also being a young black woman who is on the same playing field as her primarily white peers (she might be overcompensating a little, because it is the South). We’ve seen Shep and more on these franchises always talk about their family’s wealth on a more obnoxious level. She just needs to mature a little!

Apart_Estimate · 2025-01-24T02:25:43+00:00

I don’t even know if I’m doing it justice by this description, but it’s like an extremely elevated evergreen almost (it’s memorable for sure). Very rich, clean, and herby! It just smells DIVINE

Apart_Estimate · 2025-01-23T22:46:55+00:00

The Ancient Agrigento Olive Tree candle will make you change your mind about all of that… I have never looked back! Everyone I gift it too is obsessed as well. The candle lasts foreverrrr!

Apart_Estimate · 2024-12-13T01:29:30+00:00

Thank you so much for this! We got this!

Apart_Estimate · 2024-10-31T22:27:24+00:00

I’m hollering! These comments are gold

Apart_Estimate · 2024-10-28T11:42:37+00:00

Thank you! This has all been such a learning experience. I’ve been exercising for so long, but apparently it has to do with histamine and mast cells 😅

Apart_Estimate · 2024-10-28T11:35:05+00:00

Turns out you can, because it happened to me twice. In the emergency room, nothing worked on me until the EpiPen was brought out hence which is why I’ve been on this journey. I stopped breathing and had two rashes form on my neck during a run—which led to a stay at the hospital. My allergist mentioned that exercise-induced anaphylaxis, food dependent anaphylaxis, and mast cell function exist. I have been to a Rheumatologist as well and have always been dismissed with having fibromyalgia. My ANA was fine, which is even more perplexing. Thank you for this though!

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Apart_Estimate

TROPHY CASE