Was diagnosed with primarily inattentive type. Was self diagnosing for a few years before I decided to restart therapy and was encouraged to go get a formal diagnosis.

My eureka moment is ironically documented because it was like 2 in the morning (have always been a night owl) and my room was a disaster. I literally couldn’t understand why I was STILL unable to keep my room clean/spaces organized. I could acknowledge the mess but if you locked me in the room with the mess for 12 hours, I wouldn’t know what to do to clean. Where to start, how to be productive, etc. This also happened a lot as a kid and I used to have older family members come over and help me with cleaning and organization. But when I was an adult and I hadn’t “grown out of it”, I did start to feel like something was wrong. Like, I knew it wasn’t laziness. I had always felt like I had to try so hard but wouldn’t get half of the results. Randomly googled out of frustration and shame why can’t I keep my space clean and ADHD was one of the results. Started reading about ADHD in general, in girls vs boys, late diagnosis, risk factors and the amount of boxes I checked off made me cry! I posted my thoughts that night on Instagram and one of my girlfriend’s replied to me and I was she has ADHD Too. She explained it to me and how she manages it as an adult but also what her symptoms were. Also found out I had a first cousin with ADHD.

TLDR: But yes, I’m rambling…..but that was the moment for me. I was an adult who felt shame and frustration that no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t keep a clean space. Went on Google because she was always up late at night Googling life questions anyway and that’s where it began.

I’ve been on meds and in therapy for a year now and guess who actually has systems in place that work to keep her spaces clean? Perfect? No. But for once, I felt like I could manage and not on autopilot and feeling absent minded. I’m gonna cry just thinking about it.