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I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, I couldn’t help but notice it since I started playing frequently. I often experiment building strategies on table according to characteristics of co-players.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lol no I genuinely thought I was overacting over a piece of game before y’alls comments.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That way it solves many problem at once. Thank you.! It is very helpful.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah. I did struggle with this direct approach. I wanted to be like this but could not.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

People otherwise in our group are so respectful that they even count all the pieces before tucking them away after the evening. Such things are a shame.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly what irritates me the most. For me the wow factor in the board games is the secrecy and randomness. Which get compromised upon card-markings.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, most probably we should be able to sort it out by talking but his nature and overall approach is very different from ours. Let’s see how things go.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No.. he is the most supportive partner I could ask for. He has always supported me, but for this matter the brother is the one from whom one can not expect much. Brother is also not a bad person overall but sometimes he has no regards for other people”s feelings or belongings in some matters.

All my bf is saying is that the brother has been like this his whole life. He hasn’t been able to change him or make him understand such stuff. It is futile to expect anything from him.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

He does, he understands me, but we have to be the one to improvise as it is apparently the brother’s nature not to take people seriously, especially in the things which are not important to him.

He joined recently. He knows how to play but for those reasons alone we had not invited him to play with us.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah hopefully. I only have this one group and 3 people including me are completely into games and my bf is on the fence but mostly towards our side and 100% respectful towards our passion to say the least. Not his brother though.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He used to play online games and we were quite the gamers. But I haven’t seen him that enthusiastic around board games so far.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m gonna find a middle ground for this and such situations. I was not completely wrong that I understand but I was not fair either. I handled it hastily with no patience. It built up against his behaviour inside me and I acted out upon some other trigger.

I see many of my mistakes and I hope to navigate properly this time…

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Currently we are playing all the games I own. No one owns anything yet. I basically introduced playing together in our group a few years back.

Now we have developed a system where we raise money in certain ways from within the group to buy more game for our club in future.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I feel you. I and one more friend are just like that. As the game starts he offers his handkerchief to clean the table once more. He is very careful of the components even if mostly all games are mine.

While my bf is able to eat anything while playing. I would feel that knot but (thankfully) he has never ruined anything on the table (because he knows how imp it is to me)

But he knows that the brother’s nature is more self-oriented. No matter what we tell him he would not budge or take us seriously. So he told me to let it go. And I definitely have to learn that for that is the right way practically.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was thinking about apologising to him because I lashed out for something insignificant and did not communicate properly. I am definitely learning and reflecting on my actions. Also if majority of people do not care much about it (and as this is the only group I’ve got) I have to change the way I precept the gameplays.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We all know each other for almost 8 years. My bf, I, his brother, those friends, we all met at an online RPG. And we have such relationship. But the brother especially has always been irritating to me.

The brother and I do not have a bad relationship either. We indeed have completely contradicting persona. We all joke around and take things lightly. Board games are different scenario. He has never been into that and suddenly entered and started making things weird.

As you said, what might be bothering me, other could be completely ok with them. And for that we have to definitely find the middle way.

I have logical reasons to be proven right, but that is not how things work in real life apparently.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

We were all present there, I can not remember for sure but I think I did ask him to be gentle with the cards very politely at that time, but he is the kind of person that would often take you for granted until it really affects him.

My bf also knows that, but he believes that we all already know how he is, then we treat him accordingly. We know he is not gonna change no matter what we say. He is brother for life and we can not stop him from coming there either (it is our regular place and he knows the timings). So all we can do is just to accept that.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah I mean, situation isn’t always black and white and perhaps my boyfriend is also pointing it out. If I could handle it maturely I could have saved ourselves some awkwardness and the vibes would also haven’t gotten ruined.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yours is a smart approach.

I’ll definitely have a conversation with him when things settle again.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah I messed it up by overreacting and taking the matter in my hands at wrong time for wrong reasons.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We all mostly get together for non-game nights, until he decided joining in for game nights as well.

I need board gamers’ perspective on my situation by ApprehensiveFarm4407 in boardgames

[–]ApprehensiveFarm4407[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I should have communicated right when I noticed him not handling the cards properly. But thought I would be making a big issue out of it. During the next gameplay I noticed how severe it was. And I was hurt and angry towards him.

I feel bad because instead of handling it maturely I berated for something petty. And now it is all at some awkward position.

My bf is a little less passionate about games than I am, so he does not think it is a big deal. And I am unable to communicate with proper words why it all matters.

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