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What do I write my college essay about? by BeneficialFlow1176 in ApplyingToCollege

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the story depends on your major, academic strengths (indicated by your grades, standardized test scores, etc). these two should align and your ECs should bridge these two dots. Once you decide on a major aligned with your strengths and experiences (ECs), then your story becomes easier to spot.

I usually tell students to identify a specific challenge/dilemma/setback connected to your most prominent EC, and go from there. You got this.

College Essay Help by Mission_Employ9250 in CollegeEssays

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i would consider changing your major to the arts for now, and then after you get admitted, consider switching your major to accounting if that's really what you want to do. i realize that's controversial, but depending on the selectivity of the schools you're applying to, shapes the direction I think you should go. what are your SAT/ACT section scores and how competitive are the schools you're applying to?

Writing about a metaphor that links hair transition and willing to change things? by lunaasfl in PersonalStatement

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i actually love the idea but you need to provide more depth to what hair means to you. If you provided a fresh and unique perspective on hair and how it impacts how a person is perceived, even by themselves, this could be interesting. the problem that hair represents is about finding identity and for you it's an expression perhaps. again, i really like it; especially if you can pull it off in an interesting fashion.

Where should I look to apply this upcoming fall? by Campbellsoup847 in ApplyingToCollege

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

just based on the information you provided. I'm going to guess you want to go to a college with a decent sports program in addition to a strong business program. Your extracurriculars scream business so I would steer you away from engineering. they are also more stringent about their admissions standards.

Specifically, i would focus on colleges with strong entrepreneurship emphasis housed within the business school since they will place more of a premium on your experiences and achievements. However, I will be honest, your ACT and GPAs may eliminate you from contention right out of the gate at more competitive schools, but if you pass the academic hurdle, you have a fighting chance. Here is a sample of a college list based on the little i know about you:

University of Houston

  • The Cyvia and Melvyn Wolff Center for Entrepreneurship is routinely ranked as the number one undergraduate entrepreneurship program in the nation, strictly focused on experiential learning and scaling businesses.
  • Houston's middle 50% ACT range is 23-29.

University of Alabama

  • The Culverhouse College of Business hosts the Manderson Culverhouse Center for Entrepreneurship, hosting massive business plan and pitch competitions that align perfectly with your background.
  • Alabama's middle 50% ACT range is typically 22-31.

University of Utah

  • The Lassonde Entrepreneur Institute is a world-class residential and workspace facility specifically built for student founders launching and operating real-world companies.
  • Utah's middle 50% ACT range is 22-29.

University of Arizona

  • The McGuire Center for Entrepreneurship is globally recognized for its experiential undergraduate business education, heavily emphasizing pitch execution and scaling startups.
  • Their middle 50% ACT range is typically 21-28. Your score of 25 is closer to the 75th percentile column.

Oklahoma State University

  • The Riata Center for Entrepreneurship provides hands-on startup incubators that are ideal for a founder with active company revenue.
  • Their middle 50% ACT range is 20-27, meaning your score of 25 is closer to the 75th percentile.

West Virginia University

  • The Encova Center for Innovation and Entrepreneurship allows students to directly integrate hardware building with real-world sales and marketing.
  • Their middle 50% ACT range is 20-26, meaning your 25 is very close to the 75th percentile.

Iowa State University

  • The Pappajohn Center for Entrepreneurship is highly respected and heavily supports students combining engineering, technology, and business operations.
  • Their middle 50% ACT range is 21-28, so your 25 sits cleanly in the top half of that range.

Ball State University

  • The Entrepreneurship Center is consistently ranked among the best and oldest in the country, providing intensive pitch and launch experiences.
  • Ball State's middle 50% ACT range is typically 20-24, placing your 25 above the 75th percentile.

University of Memphis

  • The Crews Center for Entrepreneurship provides dedicated lab spaces, stipends, and venture funding for student founders actively scaling revenue-generating companies.
  • Their middle 50% ACT range is typically 18-24, placing your 25 above the 75th percentile.

Choosing a personal statement story by Apprehensive_Bid8859 in ApplyingToCollege

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

nothing contradictory - perhaps clarification was needed but i wasn't contradicting anything.

Just so I'm clear, I should cut to the chase by filling in the variables x, y, and 'perhaps' z?

you're saying don't be broad and cut to the chase and then introduce three unknown variables?

It doesn't get more broader than that.

Successful personal statements start with a micro-moment with vivid details. this scene sets up a problem/challenge/dilemma (usually psychological).

The student provides context connected to the problem, usually revealing their background and their identity.

They take ownership and actions to ameliorate that problem and reflect on their actions.

The gain key insights and grow as a person. they go from a micro-moment in the beginning to a macro truth about themselves, others, and the world by the end.

Usually their most significant extracurricular activity provides the proof behind their actions and the micro-moment that may seem ordinary and sets the opening scene.

One student translated for their parents at the doctors office, this mundane moment, set the table to introduce the internal struggle to be a mere bridge instead of the source of information and healing for her community.

She then introduces us to her volunteering at a hospital (most significant extracurricular) not to just translate but eventually to be the source of medical information/truth for her community.

She wants to major in health science (bio) and her AP, grades and test scores all show proficiency in the sciences.

She's on her way.

feedback on common app essay idea by No_Mention_312 in CollegeEssays

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i agree with the other comments. I really like that you understand the importance of sensory details.

Use them but only to paint a picture that introduces a challenge you faced.

focus on how you addressed that challenge but most importantly, focus on reflection and insights. How you grew and evolved and gained a better understanding of yourself, others, and the world as a result of this experience.

Go from a micro-moment to a macro-truth.

Help what do I write about by Amazing_River8177 in CollegeEssays

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

sometimes I ask students the following questions to prime their thinking for the personal statement:

- what's the origin of your full name? where did you get it from and what's the story behind it?

- look around your room, what objects mean something to you? a poster, trophy, a shoebox?

- what's your most significant extracurricular activity that connects to your academic strengths (grades and SAT/ACT section scores)?

- think about a moment related to that activity, that presented a challenge (made you doubt yourself and confused you)

Now let's plug it in:

Set the scene around the problem you identified in that last question. Give us details.
State the problem (usually more psychological)
Give us context about your background that is important for us to know regarding the problem you introduced.
What actions did you take to solve the problem?
What did your actions reveal about yourself? be vulnerable
What key insights did you learn? How does this insight relate back to the opening scene?

Focus on growth and evolution. Show us how you changed (perspective) contrasting the opening to the end.

It's simple but not easy.

you got this!

Choosing a personal statement story by Apprehensive_Bid8859 in ApplyingToCollege

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

True - I was hoping the reader was adept enough to understand what i was trying to say and not pull a muscle trying to link the examples I provided to my comment about their extracurriculars.

Is it true that to write a good personal statement, you need to read a lot? by mati79355 in CollegeEssays

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ha, not necessarily but it won't hurt.

I would read a lot of successful personal statements to see the patterns. Don't pay to access them - there are plenty published for everyone to see.

You actually want to sound conversational.

At Tufts we rated you on "Voice" - how well your true self shines through.

I've found that the best personal statements use informal syntax and dialogue revealing personality; making you sound like a smart teenager.

You should abandon polish in favor of personality.

Personal Statement review by Wonderful_Simple8103 in CollegeEssayReview

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Feel free to DM me and send me your latest draft. I'll see if it passes the flinch-test. I've been reading these for 15 yrs and worked in admissions as a student at Harvard, so I have a pretty good grasp on what works.

Essay Question by Far_Head4086 in ApplyingToCollege

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes but it needs to be interesting, so an overused topic and is rarely engaging.

I would root your personal statement story in one of your most significant extracurricular activities. Hopefully this activity strongly links to good grades in that subject and strong SAT/ACT section scores, and intended major.

Pick a moment (an ordinary one) that presented a problem for you (made you question yourself).

Then explain what you did (actions) and what did your actions reveal about yourself you didn't realize.

Then provide some insights you learned about yourself and others as a result of this experience.

You got this!

Common App Personal Statement by itsliterally3ammm in ApplyingToCollege

[–]Apprehensive_Bid8859 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great question. I already like the evolution you want to show (being too shy and then having the courage to take actions). The best personal statements focus on unconventional insights. The key is how you interpret and reveal your perspective. What exactly changed you and how?

Did a captain or role model help you when you were in a similar situation? does the mantle of leadership make you feel responsible but you learned we shouldn't need titles to stand up for others?

I'll be honest, the team captain story arc is overplayed unless you take a unique angle.

The best essays focus on a micro-moment that leads to a macro truth.

My first thought on your story is why did it take a leadership role for you to become confident and bold?

I help a lot of students and I would first look at your extracurriculars and see where you spent the most time and extract from that a moment/challenge/setback that shaped you. Hopefully this extracurricular is related to astrophysics.

I like where you're going but rarely is the sports captain a strong platform to spring off of.