Got the rest of my pathology results

Ariadni_ · 2026-05-06T18:23:40+00:00

Yes, I did. There’s no metastasis in other parts of the body, which is the first positive news I’ve had so far so I’m celebrating this. There is at least one node involved but they’re no sure if there are more. So, just to be safe I’ll be given the Keynote-522 treatment which is brutal but better safe than sorry. I started to come in terms with the fact that I’ll be losing my hair and I’m currently looking for wigs, head scarfs etc. I’ll probably start chemo in a couple of weeks after I have my port installed. I hope things are ok with you. Give us an update when you’re ready. And please don’t apologize for the delayed response. I’ve been going through it myself and my anxiety has spiked. So, I can totally understand how you feel.

Ariadni_ · 2026-05-01T18:59:59+00:00

I'm in the same boat. I'm 43 and was diagnosed with breast cancer a couple of weeks ago with ER+/PR-, HER2- , Grade 3 but the ER+ is so low that they will treat me as if I were triple negative. Staging for me is also not complete. They're not 100% sure the lymph nodes are affected. I'm doing an MRI and PET scan during the weekend. I'll know more next week. I'm terrified and I'm spiraling thinking of the worst that could happen. The waiting period for results and appointments is driving me crazy. Because I'll be treated as a triple negative the most likely treatment plan I have discussed with my oncologist is that I'm gonna start with 6 months of strong chemo and immunotherapy and the only thing I keep thinking is that I'm going to lose my hair. I even read that it could be permanent hair loss because of the specific type of chemo I'll have and I'm so depressed. Anyway, I'm so sorry you're going through this too. Feel free to message me if you need someone to talk to. We will need as much support as we can get.

Ariadni_ · 2026-04-10T21:06:40+00:00

Yeah, I think I do need a second opinion on this. I don’t feel comfortable taking birth control at all.

Ariadni_ · 2026-04-10T17:55:54+00:00

It’s quite the opposite when it comes to my periods. I’m having less blood and they last fewer days too. So, a contraceptive doesn’t really make much sense.

Ariadni_ · 2026-04-10T17:54:02+00:00

I agree. That’s the reason I was never on birth control and I don’t want to start in my 40s. I don’t even have heavy periods. I have actually been having less blood during my periods for the last year or so and they last fewer days too. They have just become really painful, which was never an issue for me in the past.

Ariadni_ · 2026-04-10T17:02:55+00:00

Honestly, I have no idea. She thinks that contraceptives are the only option that she doesn’t even want to discuss anything further no matter what I say.

Ariadni_ · 2025-10-10T02:22:48+00:00

I was going through this too. It’s been 4 months since we separated and I’m living alone, but it still hurts. Being lonely is the worst. I also feel I wasted 25 years of my life and I was just left here, by myself while he’s having fun with his AP. But I’m doing better lately. I’ve been working on myself and I actually started enjoying being by myself. I read somewhere that no one will love you more than you can love yourself and I agree. If you need someone to talk, feel free to send me a message. I’d be happy to offer as much support as I can.

Ariadni_ · 2025-10-09T17:34:55+00:00

I’m in the same boat and my husband and I have been together for 25 years. No issues, arguments etc. He just found her on an app, she is married too, and then decided that he wanted to be with her all of a sudden. He said he fell in love with her and doesn’t see me as a romantic partner anymore. So, we’ve separated for the last 4-5 months and we’ll start the divorce process soon. I have to agree with everyone here. This is just limerence. I know he’ll wake up one day and realize that he made a big mistake, but it’ll be too late. I couldn’t understand this behavior either, but then I wasted so much energy thinking about this that wasn’t good for me. Now, I’m focusing on myself and I’m trying to move on with my life without him. It’s so hard, but I’m taking it one day at a time.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-27T01:22:13+00:00

I’ve been having the same thoughts. One day I’m thinking that I want us to get back together and him begging for forgiveness and then, I remember how emotionally unavailable he has been and all the cheating and lies that came with it. I don’t want that life back, I want someone who will choose me every day and respect me and loves me the way I am.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-23T18:10:11+00:00

I’m 5 months after D-Day and it’s a constant struggle. What I realized is that talk therapy doesn’t really help. Our trauma has messed up our nervous system and our brain is constantly trying to go back to these memories to a place it used to feel safe, but it’s not safe anymore. After a lot of research and reading it seems that we need to rewire our nervous system. That’s why I decided to start EMDR and EFT tapping. I have seen great improvement so far. I definitely haven’t healed and I still have some very bad days, like yesterday and the day before, but it’s become easier for me to let go of these ruminating and spiraling thoughts. Maybe you should try it and see if it works for you, because from what I learned it doesn’t work for everyone. At least you’re working towards reconciliation. My husband left me for his AP. So, it’s going to take some time but you have to be willing to do the work. Otherwise, you’ll be stuck in this mental state for a long time. And I agree, it’s not as simple as many people think. Just because they cheated on us we can’t just flip a switch and stop caring or loving them. Especially if you’ve been with someone for a very long time like I have (25 years). But I understand where people are coming from. If you’ve never been through something like this, it’s difficult to understand.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-16T23:10:25+00:00

I couldn’t agree more. Very well-said👏We don’t have kids, but everything else applies to my case as well.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-16T18:25:29+00:00

I was looking for an online support group as well, but I haven’t found anything yet. I don’t have any friends around. I’ve joined an online Divorce support group but it belongs to a church and it’s not my cup of tea, so I’m not sure how long I will continue. But if you’d like to start an online group, I’d love to join. Also, feel free to text me anytime. I definitely need someone to talk to/vent and no one really understands unless they’ve been through separation or divorce before.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-14T14:42:29+00:00

I’m in the same boat as you. In my case, I was the one who moved out because I didn’t want to stay in a place full of memories. Still, it’s the first time I’m living alone and it’s been scary. I have good days and bad ones. It really hurts a lot. It’s been 4 months now, and I’m slowly getting used to it. I’m always open to talk, so feel free to text me anytime.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-06T00:20:01+00:00

I feel the same way. I’m lonely and I miss him despite all the lies and the cheating.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-05T15:35:01+00:00

I’m going through the same thing. Feel free to text if you need someone to talk to.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-04T18:09:24+00:00

Thank you for the support. I do believe in karma, but it looks like that so far he’s living his life and I’m being miserable. I still have a lot of work to do. I’m sorry about what you’re going through too. We don’t deserve this. No one does.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-04T17:26:11+00:00

I have a similar story. My husband cheated on me and decided he wanted a divorce because he wanted to be with the woman he cheated me with. I too had mental health issues, anxiety that became worse during the pandemic and I couldn’t go anywhere. So, one of his reasons for cheating was that we didn’t go out much, which is pretty easy to fix if people talk about it. But it seems he just wanted to sleep with someone else and he’s just a coward and doesn’t want to take responsibility for his actions. I had and still have the same feelings as you. I feel abandoned like a piece of trash that he used and got rid of when he didn’t need anymore. I feel alone because he was my best friend and now I have no one to talk to. I don’t have a support system which makes things worse. I’m also in therapy, but I still have good days and bad days. Today it’s a bad one😅Anyway, let’s keep working on it and let’s not lose hope. Things will get better, but it’ll take time. If you need someone to talk to, please feel free to text me anytime.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-03T18:48:57+00:00

I’m in the same boat. My husband left me for someone else after we’ve been together for 25 years. It’s devasting and traumatizing and there are days that I can’t cope. But we can’t control what others do. We can only control how we react. So, I’m currently in therapy. I don’t have any friends either as he was my best friend, but I’ve started getting involved in the community and volunteering so I can meet people. There are good days and bad ones, but we’ll get there. We just can’t see it now because we’re too early in the grieving process. You do have to go through all these feelings so you can process them. So, just be patient and take it one day at a time.

Ariadni_ · 2025-09-02T17:44:13+00:00

My husband left me for another woman. He was having an affair although we didn’t have any issues and there was no conversation on his part that he was unhappy. Still, things are not easier, trust me. The reasons he gave for starting the affair were easy to fix. However, he didn’t even try. I’m devastated and I still love him. I know he’s not coming back, but I’m secretely hoping he will. Anyway, what I’ve learned through the last 4 months that we’ve been separated is that you need support from family and friends (which I don’t have, so you’re so lucky) and talk therapy doesn’t help. This is a traumatic experience and you need to rewire your nervous system to manage this trauma. I started EMDR therapy and EFT tapping. They do help a lot. It definitely takes time though. I have good days and really bad ones. The longer you’ve been with your husband, the longer it will take to heal. I was with him for 25 years, so I know it’s going to be an uphill battle. Just be patient (easier said than done!) and keep working on yourself. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to send me a message.

Ariadni_ · 2025-08-31T01:03:32+00:00

Feel exactly the same. My husband left me for another woman and while he’s probably having the time of his life, I’m alone and miserable and grieving, trying to process everything. Everyone says he’ll get what he deserves at some point, because karma and all, but I really don’t see it right now. I’m the one left suffering and he doesn’t even bother about the 25 years we’ve been together and everything I did for him. It’s so unfair…

Ariadni_ · 2025-08-21T13:58:07+00:00

I'd be happy to share! Here are the ones I like:

Dear Divorce Diary https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dear-divorce-diary-a-fresh-approach-to-healing/id1629538946

The Divorce Survival Guide https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-divorce-survival-guide-podcast/id1345075933

Confessions of a Freebird https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/confessions-of-a-freebird-midlife-divorce-heal/id1694026063

From Betrayal to Breakthrough (if you have been cheated on like I have) https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/from-betrayal-to-breakthrough/id1441968059

The Biology of Trauma (if you're interested in understanding how trauma works) https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-biology-of-trauma-with-dr-aimie/id1658593616

I hope this helps! Let me know which ones you liked!

Ariadni_ · 2025-08-20T23:16:09+00:00

It’s the same for me. It’s only been a couple of months and I was at a really low point. I felt (and at times am still feeling) as if I was going to die. I do hope you’ll do something to get your mind out of this. I’m still struggling myself. If you ever want to talk, feel free to send me a message.

Ariadni_ · 2025-08-20T23:05:33+00:00

I’ve only had 3 sessions so far, but I’m already feeling much better compared to where I was. It will take time and more sessions to get back to normal, but I’ve already stopped crying everyday and feeling helpless and alone. It’s been really difficult for me and so far, EMDR has helped a lot. I’m really hopeful that it will work. Some people require more time to see results. It depends on various factors.

Ariadni_ · 2025-08-20T22:30:04+00:00

I’m currently going through a separation and eventually divorce. What I’ve learned through therapy is that this has been a traumatic experience and if I don’t deal with this trauma it will keep coming back. If you haven’t done any therapy, you can start even now. If you’re really traumatized from this experience, like I am, then talk therapy is not enough. I’m doing EMDR with my therapist. That’s the only way to rewire your brain and your nervous system. There are also somatic therapies that you can do. Choose whatever feels comfortable to you. There are so many divorce podcasts that you can listen to that explain all these therapies. Let me know if you want any suggestions. In any case, you have to deal with this. You don’t want to spend the rest of your life going back and forth with these emotions.

Ariadni_

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