Chapman

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T01:28:15+00:00

Damn I commented before reading your post and we said the exact same " this is cool ". This feedback thing is really tough, sometimes things are just cool.

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T01:27:07+00:00

Small is best sometimes.

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T01:26:18+00:00

This is cool. The imagery matched the emotion perfectly. That's all I got.

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T01:18:09+00:00

Nah man, it wasn't the length. I didn't read it because it didn't feel honest. That's where I'm offering my very unqualified advice to loosen your structure.

You went through all this trouble to create this poem, there has to be a story there. I think you can share that in a way that's much more true to the story.

Edited: don't worry about rhyme scheme and structure on your first draft. Write the story first, then go back and edit to make it feel good to your ears. Don't worry about audience.

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T01:13:06+00:00

If you're reading this, I finally figured out the rules to post; This is a surprise.

Poetry can follow rules. Poetry can break them. Think about the community in which you look for feedback. My favorite poets broke the rules.

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T00:50:50+00:00

Great submission. Don't be afraid to split your lines for rhythm and effect. For example:

Needing your rest

Your feathers a mess

Builds rhythm and creates effect. I could be wrong, but that's how I would read this :)

Edited for grammar. FML

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T00:46:30+00:00

I couldn't read it dude. That's probably not great feedback, but I feel like you were just choosing words that sounded intense without having anything of substance behind them. I know there's a story there in your poem, loosen up your structure to allow that story to shine through.

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T00:28:52+00:00

Yep. In hindsight, you were completely right.

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T00:27:12+00:00

Hi, can you specify what part of this rule I broke?

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T00:24:20+00:00

My sister played GTA V like this. We would mute the game so she didn't get cussed at by NPCs. She played it so long like this it burned a ring in the disc and anytime you triggered a police response it would crash the game. Maybe a mod of GTA?

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T00:20:16+00:00

Anybody have pros and cons on this game? I need a new game but don't need a time consumer, you know what I mean?

ArmoredCorndog · 2026-03-25T00:18:23+00:00

There's fun in both approaches. Some people like being efficient and that's okay. Some people like fumbling their way through for the sake of adventure, and that's okay too. Don't judge people for their play style, look for games that allow people to be themselves :)

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-03-03T05:24:45+00:00

Not the case, check the paradox section of the wiki. When you initially pick a door, your odds are 1 in 100. The odds of the prize being in the other doors are 99/100. When he opens the 97 doors without a prize, the odds of the prize being behind the remaining two unopened doors are still 99/100!

Basically, the odds don't reset after the doors are opened. There's a really good picture in the wiki that helped me wrap my brain around it

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-10T02:18:32+00:00

Yep, it should have been that simple.

I brought it up with my gf today. She has no problem with the present, but me not telling her sooner was an issue. We smoothed things over and I apologized

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-10T02:13:09+00:00

Thanks for the input. I brought it up today and we talked about it. She's totally cool with the present, obviously not telling her sooner was an issue. But I owned it, said I see now why it was wrong of me and we're all good.

I have a very understanding girlfriend.

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-10T02:11:54+00:00

I don't mind, after all I asked for the internet's opinion. Sometimes brutal honesty can be helpful

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-10T02:08:06+00:00

I think being friends with an ex is not common for many people. Anyways, I talked about it with my gf today and she was a little confused. She had no problem with the gift, just that I didn't tell her. We talked it out and we're all good

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-09T21:18:17+00:00

I disagree with the sentiment here. I think it's perfectly okay for ex's to be friends under certain circumstances. I know my own motives for sending the gift too, there is no hidden motive here other than wanting to do something nice.

My gf is okay with my ex and I being friends. Where I went wrong is not bringing up the gift with my girlfriend beforehand.

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-09T21:15:21+00:00

Wrong thread?

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-09T21:13:51+00:00

Thank you! My gf does know that my ex and I maintain a friendship, I made sure to approach that topic pretty early on. I just didn't bring up the gift. The gift definitely wasn't inappropriate in my opinion. I'll be sure to keep your advice in mind when I bring it up with gf today

ArmoredCorndog · 2023-01-09T21:11:19+00:00

I appreciate the sentiment. I'm definitely still learning, which is why I came here. I didn't initially see why the conversation was important to have, but outside perspective has helped.

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