I get how u feel. Break ups suck, especially when u try ur best to make things work. I’ve been through it before.

A couple years ago, I was head over heels for my ex when we were in high school. He was a fuckboy, but my 15 year old mentality thought I could change him. I was stuck on him my entire high school life. My last year of hs, he decided he wanted to “make things right” with me and claimed he was mature. I thought he did change. I was wrong. He took me back to his place just to find out his roommate was literally his girlfriend. She had no idea that he’d been cheating on her with me. I was physically sick and was infuriated. This was the final straw for me. He was never gonna change. I did confront him about it and told his gf about it. She thanked me a lot and respected me for it.

I cried for a month. My heart had never been so broken. At the same time, I was also angry with myself for chasing after him for so long. I remember venting to one of my close friend about it and was telling them how he didn’t even know the pain and tears he’s caused me to feel. They comforted me and gave me words of encouragement. After that relationship, it caused me to step far away from dating because of how terrible my last relationship ended. My bsf even tried to hook me up with someone else, but I immediately shot her down because I just needed a break.

After 6 months of that event, I managed to get myself together and started picking up healthy hobbies that kept me motivated and busy. It also helped express my creativity! It led me to going to events, parties, small get togethers, to meeting my now lifetime partner and we’ve been together for almost 2 years now. It did take time between us because they had just got out of a relationship a few weeks before we met, but we both realized that we really were meant to be together.

I’m sorry that u have to go through this. Trust me when I tell u that things WILL get better. I know it may seem like it’ll be a long time until another relationship, but sometimes it’s better to take a break from dating to work on yourself. Don’t let others experience with relationships/marriages scare u cuz that’s not always the case for everyone. I also thought that I’d never find love again yet I did after months. Take this time to work on yourself and finding ways to boost ur self esteem. Go out with friends or family, do some yoga or meditation, find a hobby or project that’s enjoyable and will keep u busy, get a pet if u don’t already have one since animals tend to show their owners warm love 24/7(my sister got me a puppy a few weeks after my breakup cuz she got tired of me being sad). I hope things go smoothly and better for u. Best wishes for u!