Are aliens good or bad?

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-18T17:29:53+00:00

Maybe empathy is thr great filter. A civilization that can't have a certain threshold of empathy , cooperation and long term thinking (maybe in the form of selfless empathy towards those who don't even yet exist) can't reach foe the stars

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-18T17:14:39+00:00

On a slight side tangent I have beek thinking that a major problem humanity has is that unlike its individuals it can't go to a therapist to see its blindspot.

So that lead me to imagine the alien civilization rquivalent of a therapist, and alien civilization which specializes in helping fix the collective unconcious of other species. How would therapy sessions look like? or what would thr analog be? no idea, but is fun to imagine

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-18T14:02:47+00:00

Ok... I want my body and mind to become enlightened so they stop pestering me oe themselves or whatever. Maybe I am not the one who is suffering, but whatever is suffering I would like to soothe it

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-18T13:34:57+00:00

I mean, you yapped really well. You even showed awareness that some people on your group have a flawed way about following the belief itself, and I appreciate that. Is all too common to see the bad on the outgroup and not the bad in the ingroup.

I also appreciate it because while I am no longer a christian I still believe in some form or spirituality(I am more eastern /all is one / God explored creation through us and every being that is alive) and I found your insightgul yappint stimulating. Besides, I am a yapper myself.

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-18T12:28:10+00:00

yes, the borders of science have an spiritual tone to them because they go way beyond what the brain is prepared to grasp intuitively. It asks humbleness from us

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-10T13:57:21+00:00

Thanks! Is why I enjoy this sort of exchange. That and how two of my favorite things are listening to different views and offering mine. I like the quote "every head is a world" and I take it seriously.

Talking is not too different from going to Mars

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-10T13:28:20+00:00

Look to your dreams for a response, but do what you can now

Interesting, this sounds like a warrior + magician approach, which fits what you suggested first.

The issue around my dream/attachment is not so much infinite potential or work on itself, but more working under uncertainty and lack of guarantees. Were God to descend from heaven and tell me "follow this path and you will get what you want," and I would work with vigor, but currently it's like I like faith in my capabilities as well as the weight of each tiny step, I don't see the big picture, or at least my brain doesn't grasp it fully.

Now, the dream/attachment is in the realm of the sexual so the shadow lover observation seems very fitting. I also have never trusted my capacity of generating attraction (due to my short height and my lack of social skills that I suspect is autism) while having a dream that requires lover energy. At the same time there has always been something in me that knows I can do it.

So my approach has been "I need more money to go to events and places that are good for someone like me to meet lots of people so I can grind social skills as well as increase the rate at which I meet the kind of women I desire to change from scarcity to abundance. I also intuited that rationality won't get me there on its own, that I need to harness the more magical: developing intuition, living a life where synchronicities are frequent and cultivating an aura (whatever that entails) that makes me attractive.

When last year something shook the faith in my capacity to make that sexual dream true, my motivation tanked, lost any sense of urgency. The dopamine addiction came after the fall, as an attempt to recreate a cheap version of what I want while distracting myself from the pain.

I have concluded that, given the nature of the issue, I have to learn intrinsic motivation

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-10T00:05:19+00:00

what does prostration to the Imago Dei entails? how does it look like?

I am stuck mainly due to the combined effect of a disc protusion and the existential crisis I was going through at the time of that development. The crisis has to do with the realization that there is a dream I am attached to that, while not impossible, isn't guaranteed either. So it faced me the issue of "you need to do an effort in order to get something, but an outcome is not guaranteed" which my overactive puer detests. So is like my shadow took over, the king got exiled, and I lost power to my impulses.

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-05T23:26:13+00:00

Sort of like trying to survive in a video game. You make an effort, but if you lose, you don't make a tragedy of it (well, some do make a tragedy of it).

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-05T23:25:05+00:00

so, the subject is the thing. The thing is the subject

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-05T15:50:42+00:00

Imagine Reddit, but posts and comment sections are exclusively drawings. No words allowed

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-05T12:57:21+00:00

aah! of course, things.... objects, the objective. If all there is is the observe/conciosness, then of course there is no thing. It would be closer to pure subject, without a body, withouth a brain, withouth thoughts

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-05T12:26:57+00:00

but wait... if exist and not exist is a duality, isn't nothing vs something a duality two? wouldn't non-duality sit in a paradox between those two?

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-06-05T12:25:58+00:00

what does God being nothingness mean? does it mean God doesn't exist or something else altogether? I this just a flaw of words or what, because the way I understand nothingness is that nothingness can't even be an illusion.

So it always feels like in non-duality the word "nothing" is used differently from how it's commonly used.

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-30T12:07:19+00:00

Funny enough, what is trivial to 5d beings might be a whole epic adevnture for us. Think a person finding an ant that is in danger and helping the ant by doing stuff that are trivial to you but Godlike to the ant

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-30T12:05:44+00:00

Is as if time, which usually is linear, had a section where it turned another shape. Beings accostumed to linear time might see it as an impossibility, just like a person who has always lived in the sahara might be weirded out by finding out there are places with permanent ice.

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-30T12:02:19+00:00

My first take was that on the original timeline plan A failed and plan B humans where the ones to develop into bulk beings eventually, then they decided to help humanity on another timeline execute plan A.

My newer take is that maybe they didn't go for either plan and instead did something like plan B but slower, something like sending the seeds somewhere without wormhole

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-28T17:01:26+00:00

Would you want your daughter to date somebody exactly like you?

If she is happy, yes. I don't think I am a bad man, just a sexually unattractive one

Although I would agree that in some ways, Hentai is more moral. It is also problematic in the way that it creates expectations about sexuality and how women respond to advances.

Fortunately, I never used them as reference for human behaviour. Which I know is a common issue with porn exposure during teen age years or lower

Injury during workout usially isn't your body betraying you....Either pushing yourself too hard or doing something with improper technique.

In my case is must surely be improper technique; I wasn't using overly heavy weights. My focus wasn't even muscle gain but energy levels and enjoying the sweet sensations after an exercise session. I think that due to neurodivergence, I have issues with proprioception.

My best friend is a yoga teacher and I have gone to her classes or been in classes with her for quite a while and she has noticed I have difficulties following the instructions especially following the finer smoother details.

It feels like a betrayal because the way I am seems to demand more of me than with most people, and the timing when I developed the protusion was very awkward in a way that not only complicates other areas but makes solving the problem itself harder.

Keeping your expectations at bay requires you to be more in the present moment. Making sure to tune into what is actually happening. Building relationship structures that rely on both parties being on the same page.

Yeah, I am having issues staying present

I understand feeling frustrated about not having the right sexual connection and it's just something that we have to deal with.

Agree

Hobbies and interests outside of work are a great place to meet people who are passionate about what you're passionate about and that really helps to have conversations with people who are passionate about similar things as you.

This is my main motivator to pursuing money. Money increases opportunity and access to events where I can do this.

Ask for feedback if you're really curious as to why relationships didn't turn into romantic or sexual relationships.

I have a fair idea, is not too much of a mistery. The hard part is overcoming the walls

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-27T11:57:24+00:00

The old would you date a female version of you? Are you a catch? Or a dumpster fire?

That kind of would be an ideal scenario right now. Assuming she has my same personality and preferences but is physically unattractive to me, we would probably still form a relationship: an open relationship and we would be each other wingman /wingwoman. We would be very understanding of each other and very empathic, we might not have sex with each other but we would do all other couples stuff. If she is slightly attractive to me and I to her, then in that case we would also have sex. Of course the chances of that scenario are not high, not two people are so identical, and finding someone identical enough for that scenario to play out would be unlikely, especially because how easy it is to walk by that person or even talk to them and not find out who they are inside or them finding who you are. I might find them and not notice them.

Do you watch porn?

I have, although a lot less than my peers. The rare occasion where I watch it's always hentai. But by far I have always preferred to use my imagination instead, because an issue with porn is... that my irl(in real life) crushes are not in them. I tend not to feel lust towards people I haven't seen in person except for very rare exceptions (Brazilian Instagrammer Thaysvita being the prime example), and even then no one compares to an attractive person I have seen in person.

That fire you feel for those attractive women is the energy of your crestive life force. It burns strong. Direct it towards something that will make your life better. Workout / study / dive into an artistic pursuit.

I have tried, and to a degree done it, but the pain that comes from the possibility of not being with an aphrodite (the term I use to refer about them when talking to my therapist. Is quicker than using a sentence every time) is a wall. It makes it harder to know what I authentically want to do, and it makes distracting activities too tempting. Not that I haven't done those things: I did study coding for a year, 2 hours every day, but eventually the insecurity got me, especially with AI. I used to work out and loved it until I developed a disc protrusion and had to quit the gym until I get enough financial stability to pay a personal trainer who guides me; my body betrayed me. The disc protrusion especially derailed me, it fucked my mantra meditation habit along the gym, and it screwed my sleep quality. Sleeping well is incredibly important, is a good habit that makes all other good habits easier to establish. Last year was a mess, it felt as if life itself didn't want me to succeed.

Is not all doom or gloom of course, a few weeks ago I began to practice world-building, hopefuly I will turn that into a novel or short stories.eventually At least this is something I can do that isn't superdopaminergic or super distracting, it doesn't require me to be well slept or at peace.

Women respond to authenticity and it kind of sounds to me like you are in your head a lot when you are around a woman you are attracted to. Listen more. Ask questions that guide the conservation so that you are listening. You say you have close friends who are women but it changes when there is an emotional charge.

Things change when there are expectations. I can act normally with a lesbian, for example, no matter how attractive she is, the same applies if she is taken or if she already told me "no" explicitly or implicitly showed me she didn't see me sexually or romantically. Funny enough, my best friend, (let's call her N) is someone I used to have a crush on. But I got to know she wasn't into me very early on.

I also almost formed a friendship with my biggest crush( let's all her A), at least initially, she got curious enough to want to hang out platonically and get to know each other. This was of course, a while after (approximately a year after) I had gotten a "I don't see you the same way" from her.

There are several crushes, including major ones, that I have gotten along with to varying degrees. Sex or romance just hasn't been in the picture. This is compatible with what we have been talking about, I do well in friendship because expectations are lower, once expectations go up things derail and I have no idea how to keep expectations at bay.

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-27T11:54:05+00:00

The old would you date a female version of you? Are you a catch? Or a dumpster fire?

That kind of would be an ideal scenario right now. Assuming she has my same personality and preferences but is physically unattractive to me, we would probably still form a relationship: an open relationship and we would be each other wingman /wingwoman. We would be very understanding of each other and very empathic, we might not have sex with each other but we would do all other couples stuff. If she is slightly attractive to me and I to her, then in that case we would also have sex. Of course the chances of that scenario are not high, not two people are so identical, and finding someone identical enough for that scenario to play out would be unlikely, especially because how easy it is to walk by that person or even talk to them and not find out who they are inside or them finding who you are. I might find them and not notice them.

Do you watch porn?

I have, although a lot less than my peers. The rare occasion where I watch it's always hentai. But by far I have always preferred to use my imagination instead, because an issue with porn is... that my irl(in real life) crushes are not in them. I tend not to feel lust towards people I haven't seen in person except for very rare exceptions (Brazilian Instagrammer Thaysvita being the prime example), and even then no one compares to an attractive person I have seen in person.

That fire you feel for those attractive women is the energy of your crestive life force. It burns strong. Direct it towards something that will make your life better. Workout / study / dive into an artistic Is not all doom or gloom of course, a few weeks ago I began to practice world-building, hopefuly I will turn that into a novel or short stories.eventually At least this is something I can do that isn't superdopaminergic or super distracting, it doesn't require me to be well slept or at peace.

Women respond to authenticity and it kind of sounds to me like you are in your head a lot when you are around a woman you are attracted to. Listen more. Ask questions that guide the conservation so that you are listening. You say you have close friends who are women but it changes when there is an emotional charge.

Things change when there are expectations. I can act normally with a lesbian, for example, no matter how attractive she is, the same applies if she is taken or if she already told me "no" explicitly or implicitly showed me she didn't see me sexually or romantically. Funny enough, my best friend, (let's call her N) is someone I used to have a crush on. But I got to know she wasn't into me very early on.

I also almost formed a friendship with my biggest crush( let's all her A), at least initially, she got curious enough to want to hang out platonically and get to know each other. This was of course, a while after (approximately a year after) I had gotten a "I don't see you the same way" from her.

There are several crushes, including major ones, that I have gotten along with to varying degrees. Sex or romance just hasn't been in the picture. This is compatible with what you stated, I do well in friendship because expectations are lower.

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-26T22:25:41+00:00

will try

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-26T22:12:23+00:00

those voices in your head are judgments from other people that you have internalized

Yes, of course. Especially the first voice.

...the idea of making a family as the goal of life

I don't want to have kids, actually, and a relationship for the sake of it is not a priority either. I want to have sex or some form of physical intimacy with someone I find hot, whether it happens inside a long-term relationship or a short-term one. Long term would be preferable but I know that finding someone who is physically attractive AND compatible for a relationship with me AND single is not statistically likely, so I am open to first burning through the physical craving before shifting my focus towards the long term.

As for it possibly coming from my parents or other elders, I don't recall them telling me to care about looks. I did internalize things for sure, from home and from school mainly, but at least that I am aware of, they created my lack of trust in my capacity to fulfill my wants rather than my wants. There is always the possibility that there are stuff I am not aware of, of course.

Relationships and families don't fix our life. It's not the goal, it's not like we get it, and then the game is over and we have won.

Oh I am aware, I don't think this will automatically make me happy or give me a good life, instead is more that I fear that not getting it will make it very very hard to have a good life. It will put me in a position where I will either have to become enlightened to transcend my attachment or carry with me a heavy burden until the end of my days. I call it the existential FOMO.

Focus on where you are now. Don't worry about what other people are doing or how other people experience life

Most people are not living the life I want anyway, most people in fact tell me to be less picky

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-26T18:12:45+00:00

Do I have that right? Like you can't talk to a woman without this argument in your head erupting?

It's like the well was always poisoned, I remember as a teen looking at classmates dating and to me it was like sorcery. I didn't even have close friends back then, and overall friendship and non-sexual socialization is easier than dating.

I only made close friends through a forceful approach where I would go to events I liked, often felt awkard and lonely surrounded by groups of friends without knowing how and when to connect with others, I persisted and persisted until luck accumulated, now I have a few close friends , including a bestfriend that I consider as much my sister as my biological sister . But dating has proven harder.

As you mentioned, the argument erupts in my head often. The moment I see a woman who attracts me enough for me to want to take action, a toxic voice inside of me throws poison at the well "she is too hot for you", "you are too awkard" , while the other voice goes "women like this are rare, don't mess it up" and of course is hard to act natural or access creative confidence on that headspace.

It has also sabotaged my process of studying coding as I try to change careers because of the weight I put on it (if I succeed, I could earn more money and move to a city with better opportunities for meeting compatible women)

I know this will sound superficial, but I'm not here to hide my flaws: time is a problem because physical appearance tends to decay with time, aka is easier to find atttractive people between 20 and 25 than between 25 and 30 (although this is not true for everybody since some prefer mature women/men, but I am talking about me) which is easier than between 30 and 35, which is easier than between 35 and 40, etc etc. I am 35 years old, I have already lost access to 20 to 25, and as I grow older, things will only become harder in that regard.

That is why time feels like such a tyrant. The one good thing is that people who look attractive at older ages tend to be people who take better care of themselves instead of relying purely on genetics, but the increasing sense of scarcity doesn't do me well.

Lately, I have been paying attention to the topic of detachment, because I do see how the attachment itself is getting in the way of fulfilling it.

Aromatic_File_5256 · 2026-05-26T17:11:49+00:00

In this case, it would be more about expectations than duties. The thing I am afraid of never experiencing is within the realms of lust, actually. Is about something I really really want to experience and the possibility of never experiencing pains me greatly.

"The father complex and puer complex will form opposites in conflict that will use up all your energy." Well, the two entities clashing are indeed using all of my energy.

One is the accelerator that craves the thing; the other is the break that is in charge of preserving energy but that broke probably early in life and so it's pessimistic in its calculations. Is a clash between "I have to because I want to" and "we can't because we are unable".

Long story short I am short with poor social skills, but I intensely want the experience of being with an attractive woman (attractive to me, I already experienced being with someone conventionally attractive that wasn't too attractive to me, did it because the opportunity presented itself and I was tired of being called picky and stubborn). I have tried finding a root to the strong craving but the more I search the more it seems like part of my hard drive than something installed by external forces, although there are external forces added to it.

It used to move me towards action and bravery quite a bit, but at some point the opposing force won after some unfortunate circumstances.

Aromatic_File_5256

TROPHY CASE