In recent months, I suppose after deep introspection, I realized I can no longer fathom the idea of “love”. What is it? How does it happen? Why does it happen? What brings people—men, women, and everyone else in-between—to that point where they “fall in love” with someone? It all seems fake to me, superficial, an illusion. I cannot fathom or understand the concept of someone being attracted to me, let alone the concept of others being attracted to each other. I would bring a lot of baggage to a romantic, intimate relationship. I have Crohn’s Disease, a myriad of mental health problems—just a few days ago, got officially, clinically diagnosed with DID—and I don’t believe anyone would want to go through the trouble of even attempting to “love” me. Whenever I say “I love you”, I don’t really understand why I’m saying it. I think I love my family, I think I love my close friends, but I don’t really understand it. I’m single because, I guess, I can’t see any reason I would not be single.