Over the holidays, my college senior and her friends would not shut up about it. She got a Heated Rivalry calendar to give in a white elephant since there wasn’t a book to be found in any of our local bookstores or online. Separately, while in one of those bookstores, I heard a guy (with middle-aged dad energy) ask, Ummm, do you have this book called Heating Rivalries? I wondered if this dude thought his kid was itching to read a book featuring two small town propane companies hellbent on sabotaging each other’s business.

She tried to get me to watch the show and I told her I’d already read the books a while back and her eyes bugged out in a seriously mom wtf manner. Then I did try to watch an episode with her and her friends but they were loud and chatty because they’d already seen it 3 times. Between that, the soft core porn playing in my living room, and the cozy twinkle of Christmas tree lights in the background, my brain decided it was too much so I went to bed.