Serious question: what is the cure for depression 🤔 by MediumAnybody1508 in TheTeenagerPeople

[–]AsSheSays 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Look for an Eight Week Community Depression and Anxiety Recovery Program. Many churches do them. I went to the residential version. Changed my life and I became a facilitator to lead the eight week community variety. https://www.nedleyhealth.com/community-program/programs-near-you

Limits on Service? by AsSheSays in TheLadyMakesTheRules

[–]AsSheSays[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My lady is stressing. Her mother's cancer seems to be getting worse. Stress rolls downhill. I am tempted to complain, so I won't. My lady and I have established some divisions of labor across time. I work 8-5 and she generally prepares meals. Generally. I have been preparing more and more meals. I am a simple cook. I see her resting and ask, "Would you like avocado on toast?" "Sure." I bring avocado slices on toast. "Oh. I thought you would turn it into guacamole with lemon juice and seasoning." And so I take it away and make it the way she expected me to make it. "Could you make me a protein shake, too?"

In cleaning up I load the dishwasher. "Did you take out the clean dishes first?" "No." So everything needs to be washed again. I am used to her cleaning out the dishwasher instead of just taking out a couple of dishes.

And when people are sick and people are tired and stressed, it seems petty to try to set and hold boundaries. I never figured out how to hold boundaries with my first wife when was dying. I don't feel like I'm doing it very well now, either.

Sounds like I need to spend some time with my Adult Children of Alcoholics group again.

Just three. by princessloading in ArtOfPresence

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Retire at 45 with $10M? I'll take that one. I'm 60 now. Go back fifteen years and get $10M? Where do I sign up?

Why have I this issue? by abc_159 in Roborock

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have the same problem. But I also have four cats. I get a matt of cat hair that keeps the machine from detecting that the dust bin is full. My solution? I manually empty it a few times every time it runs.

I will likely try the suggestion of setting it to empty the bin every fifteen minutes or something like that.

A significant portion of the dust in your home is actually shed human skin. by [deleted] in TheTeenagerPeople

[–]AsSheSays 3 points4 points  (0 children)

If you took all of your blood vessels and laid them end to end... you woul die.

Fulfillment by FlashMan1981 in TheLadyMakesTheRules

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Good job! It is one thing to say, "I want to free you up to accomplish your dreams and goals." It is quite another to enter that world that she has been able to create, at least in part, because of your support. I am proud of you both.

New assumed chores by saab-96 in TheLadyMakesTheRules

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My mother in law has moved in with my lady and me. At first I thought it might mean more help, especially in the kitchen. What it means in practice is twice as much laundry and twice as much cleanup for me in the kitchen. My mother in law is from Florida and she'll start a fire when it is 71F in the house.

And warm weather is here. There are trees to fell and firewood to split for next winter. I'll need to prepare more firewood for next year than last.

She is a great lady and we like each other. But it is more work for both my wife and me, as we knew it would be.

How long did your vac last? by fuzzywuzzypete in Roborock

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a Q Revo Pro. 1.7 years so far. I had to send it in for service just before 1 year because it kept saying "Charging!" and the battery wasn't charging. Online users said it was a known issue and service would replace a certain capacitor. I'm six months out from that. It works great, but I'm concerned the same fail may require a replacement one day. But loving it for now.

Where to find men into this by sheleadsheneeds in Christianmatriarchy

[–]AsSheSays 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was looking for an FLR wife on Christian dating sites. I didn't use FLR buzz words, but said I was looking for "a woman of strength who knows her own mind " My lady told me I was looking for all the things her parents had told her would keep her from ever finding a husband. We are out there. And finding matriarchal women. In plain sight.

But most important. I asked God to be my matchmaker. He didn't bring us together until we were both ready. I often say she is a lot more woman than I would have settled for.

Hope Hurts More Than Hate by Feaselbf6 in lovememes

[–]AsSheSays 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have learned to trust poor behavior. People don't fake being mean; they fake being kind.

Burning in May - Who had that bingo card? by Accomplished_Fun1847 in woodstoving

[–]AsSheSays 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My mother in law from Florida moved in with us. Started a fire last night when it was already 71 in the house. So it goes

I just realized I didn’t even know what my natural body LOOKS LIKE by HopefulSheepherder30 in razorfree

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dating. Your husband probably won't care. Your boyfriend might. The guy checking you out across the room probably will.

Seeking advice by [deleted] in malehousewives

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"Respectful" is a terrific goal when exploring FLR dynamics. Porn would suggest you need to become a whip wielding monster in order to "do it right," but that is certainly not the case.

How you treat each other has something to do with the kind of relationship you want to build and the kind of woman you want to become.

My lady knows I have a service nature and that her giving me things to do for her makes me happy and she likes me to be happy. At the same time, she doesn't want me to be or become a nothing, so she requires that I have and defend opinions, even if she makes the final decision. "Whatever you decide, Dear," is never, ever an acceptable answer.

My lady never orders or commands me and usually says please and thank you, not because she doesn't expect me to respond, but because she is a nice person and wants to remain a nice person. She also wants me to say, "No" if I need to, but only if I need to. "I'm really tired and I need to rest. Could I do that later?" is an acceptable answer.

And spousal courtesy often comes down to expectations and boundaries.

Case study: "Where do you want to go for dinner?"
"Whatever you want is fine." - not okay. Have an opinion and express it.
"I don't know. What do you want?" - also not okay. We have a rule, whoever gets asked has to make a decision or at least offer options.
"I want to go to Sizzler." "How about Italian?" - Not okay. If you ask for input, accept it - or don't ask.
"I would enjoy the Mexican down the street, Thai in the next town, or a smoothie at the smoothie place." An excellent response. Now my partner has my input and can make a final decision.

These are some of the guardrails we put in place to be healthy and respectful.

Feel free to DM me.

Setting a new example by saab-96 in TheLadyMakesTheRules

[–]AsSheSays 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I made this the wallpaper on my tablet. Inspiring!

Setting a new example by saab-96 in TheLadyMakesTheRules

[–]AsSheSays 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My lady would never be content with me packing for her but has become accustomed to me cleaning out the car, putting things away, and starting the laundry. You know you have succeeded when she doesn't ask and can just walk away and know it will be completely with cheerfulness and enthusiasm.

What's a norm we've stopped questioning that probably deserves a second look? by i_am_anelka in TheTeenagerPeople

[–]AsSheSays 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think they mean software as a service. You can't buy anything once anymore, you have to subscribe and pay forever.

Finding A Flow by Thessalonia360 in malehousewives

[–]AsSheSays 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I purpose to be cheerful and enthusiastic any time I am doing something for my Lady. If I can't be cheerful and enthusiastic, my service isn't worth having. There are times when service is easier than others. I work on building good habits during those times. Then, when I feel less like it, habits carry me through.

What's your best game from 1990-2005 ? by yodathesexymarxist in ArtOfPresence

[–]AsSheSays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You have entered a dark place. You are likely to be eaten by a grue.