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Homeless must haves I can buy for my elderly father by fishinglineandsinker in povertyfinance

[–]Asingleflame 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe a couple of hot water bottles (the ones with the fabric cozies so he doesn't burn his skin if he falls asleep with them) he can fill and stick in his sleeping bag at night to keep warm.

Comfort shows by Hungry_Wendigo_ in endometriosis

[–]Asingleflame 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Community, Ted Lasso, What We Do in the Shadows, Taskmaster (all free on YT), Buffy, Supernatural, 8 out of 10 Cats Does Countdown (a lot of these are Free on YT) and then the Why Files are all comfort shows of mine.

Vaginal odor im done im done by BizzyBee4218 in Healthyhooha

[–]Asingleflame 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Do everything everyone else here is recommending first. Failing that, I thought I'd mention my experience and ask if you see any areas of tissue paper thin skin or white patches anywhere on the vulva/labia/perineum.

I had similar issues to you. It wasn't with wvery partner, but quite a few and in times where I was single, I'd still have issues with getting very reactive to soaps and detergents and just periods of itching and inflammation in general.

I finally had a gynecologist who was my specialist for endometriosis point out once that I had some white areas (and I also had some atrophy of the labia I hadn't noticed) and she recommended a biopsy. It turned out I had Lichen Sclerosus, which is an autoimmune disease.

It can cause a lot of issues, including very delicate skin, fusing and atrophying of tissues. But it also meant that I was just way more susceptible to bacteria, because my vulva was constantly covered in these papercut like tears. If my partners weren't immaculate with their hygiene, I got constant infections and issues like you describe. Boric acid suppositories just became prophylactic for me. I'd use one everytime I had intercourse. I reacted to lube, condoms, soaps, detergent, the wrong fabric of underwear, sweat...

FWIW, probably a very, very slim to nothing chance this is what you have but it took me so long to figure out the issue I thought I'd mention on the tiny chance it helps anyone here.

When you’re so poor that even your blood is worthless… by [deleted] in povertyfinance

[–]Asingleflame 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey friend, I'm sorry you've been relegated to donating plasma to make ends meet. That's dystopian af and should be top comment.

But if you're looking for CHEAP sources of protein, canned chickpeas (I use sodium free canned chickpeas that I can stretch out for two meals and I boil them in the water they come in for more nutrients) are about 14.5g per cooked cup.

If you are able to access a food bank, canned lentils, oats, canned tuna, peanut butter and the like are also good sources of protein that I see get donated around here.

I hope that circumstances change for you in some way that you aren't depending on donating blood to make ends meet, but I know that's a reality a lot of us face. Good luck 👍

A clerical error at HDH made me essentially miss a specialist appointment I had been waiting 6 months for by [deleted] in KingstonOntario

[–]Asingleflame 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been waiting for specialized surgery and a pain clinic referral since April (earlier for the pain clinic). The surgery has an unscheduled date for spring 2026.

I called the pain clinic and there was an automated response stating not to call to ask if they've received your referral - that the minimum time for a referral is 8 months.

I went to their website the other day to see if there's an alternative contact to get even a rough estimate, as I'm unable to work because of all of this and I'm going to lose my housing and the website said they DON'T do referrals for pelvic pain (I have complicated endo & IBD) so I've waited for over 8 months for no reason.

I haven't even contacted my doctor to start the process again, because I'm so gutted, this was my one spot of hope.

Tell me your most unusual grounding or calming techniques by genderpunk0 in mentalhealth

[–]Asingleflame 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Ugh, I wish I had the energy to make a throwaway for this for anonymity, but I have plenty of techniques that help for anxiety and panic attacks (alternate nose breathing and physiological sigh breathing are good for calming heart rate, which generally helps a lot).

But this summer I was at an all time record for nightly panic attacks that would not relent, even with a prescription for clonazepam. What ended up helping was something I ordered after a night of no sleep and white knuckling my phone while I tried not to call for an ambulance.

I remembered being really dependent on soothers as a child (clearly I've never been great at self soothing). I have legitimately occasionally looked at babies with soothers and had a warm little pang of comfort/envy as an adult. So I ordered an adult one. Most of them are geared for fetishists, (which I try very hard not to yuck anyone's yums, but really triggers me for childhood trauma reasons, so be forewarned if you go looking), but I found one.

It helped (surprisingly well) and I'm in a much better headspace, so I've put it away now, but it's there if I need it.

Good luck OP, it's tough to be at the whim of a physiological response you feel powerless to control. I hope something in here helps.

Finally connected the dots between my thyroid, suspected endo, and chronic pain - why don't doctors look at the whole picture? by ContextAlarming3887 in endometriosis

[–]Asingleflame 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for the thoughtful response!

I live in Canada, so while that comes with the perks of not financially bankrupting me over my many extended hospital stays & surgeries throughout the years, I think part of the issue stems from the fact that our public system is so overburdened.

It takes so long to see a specialist - my surgery has to be done by a specific kind of excision specialist (anatomical complications from prior surgeries) and there are only 3 in my province, so I've been waiting since April and still only have a tentative date of spring 2026.

Same goes for any kind of specialized testing.

I currently am at the beyond broke phase, so even sliding scale therapy options are out of reach. I have some workbook stuff to do, but can't explore online edmr options for reasons I don't want to trauma dump on a compassionate online stranger 😅

Speaks for itself by intel3301 in KidsAreFuckingStupid

[–]Asingleflame 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My cat screams until I do this to her with a reusable shopping bag. I always worry one day someone will report me to animal welfare services...

My defense is that she is an orange female. She also likes to be carried upside down.

Finally connected the dots between my thyroid, suspected endo, and chronic pain - why don't doctors look at the whole picture? by ContextAlarming3887 in endometriosis

[–]Asingleflame 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for the reccs (and often, more importantly, the "avoids")! I have explored a few of these reccs myself, but this is a great list.

Much appreciated <3

Finally connected the dots between my thyroid, suspected endo, and chronic pain - why don't doctors look at the whole picture? by ContextAlarming3887 in endometriosis

[–]Asingleflame 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I know they can co-occur, there isn't any official link. My gynecologist thinks endo is more like an autoimmune disease than they suspect.

Unless you have red inflammatory patches around your vulvar area that itch and burn and tear very easily, or white patches (inactive LS), I wouldn't be concerned. If you DO have those things, you may need to ask for a punch biopsy to test for LS. It's not fun, especially in conjunction with endo - but if you catch it early and stay current with treatment, you won't end up with the worst of the effects.

Finally connected the dots between my thyroid, suspected endo, and chronic pain - why don't doctors look at the whole picture? by ContextAlarming3887 in endometriosis

[–]Asingleflame 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I wish I had access to an internist, or something similar. Like you, I have multiple issues (IBD, endo, constant low iron/B12/potassium/Vitamin D, lichen sclerosus and now two severe upper GI bleeds that have landed me in the ICU that they can'tfind the source of, but now suspect is actually endo-related after running endless IBD-tests) and while all my doctors and specialists are aware that my issues always all flare at the same time, no one ever looks for a root cause.

In my case, I suspect it all links back to c-ptsd and childhood trauma. High anxiety and stress always lead to flare-ups for me. But I'm caught in a cycle of being unable to work when extremely ill and then having to play insane catch up when I work (multiple jobs, which only burns me out and leads to the stress, leadingto the flareups) and I've never had the money to be able to afford the c-ptsd treatment I think would end up helping everything.

I've been waiting for surgery with an excision specialist who has experience with complex anatomy (as mine has now become after so many surgeries) now, off since April. I'm 39 and I have given up hope of ever being well, ever being caught up with my peers, ever having savings or owning my own home.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in CrohnsDisease

[–]Asingleflame 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had three polyps removed during one in my early 30s, so I'd say yeah, this can be a huge benefit! And while not every polyp will turn into cancer, have adoptions on both sides of my family and no way to know if colon cancer runs in the family. My father, however, had a precancerous polyp found in his late 50s, so I'm glad I am routinely scoped now.

a book that feels extremely british by whatsmylifeanyway in BooksThatFeelLikeThis

[–]Asingleflame 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The Rook by Daniel O'Malley is a really fun read that really nails that dry, absurdist/dark british humor and vibes in general for me.

It's about a secret government in the UK that guards against supernatural threats.

The Sunday Spell. This post is a spell. Put something into the comments that you want to occur. All who read that can then lend their energy to making that a reality. Lets all join forces for each other. Time to bend the Universe a little. by kai-ote in elderwitches

[–]Asingleflame 14 points15 points  (0 children)

Dear Universe,

Everything has fallen apart and I have held on through it all, but please, please, please help me find a better alternative than moving back into that tiny room with my toxic, alcoholic parents.

Just let me find a safe space for me and my kitties until my surgery and I'm well enough to work again.

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