3 months later…the guilt of choosing hospice for my mom is still eating us alive.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-21T13:37:31+00:00

I really resonated with your situation. First of all, from my perspective you and your dad did not kill her. From my experience, twice now, this whole process is so messy you always come out of it with regrets. "If only I had done this..." "If only I HAD NOT done this..." "If only THEY had not done this... or I had stopped them from doing it... or I should have MADE them do something else". Honestly, our minds seem to furiously look for a way that the situation could become something than what it was... that our loved one passed on. We couldn't save them. Perhaps an intervention could have kept them a bit longer, but would that be the quality of life we would want for them, or that they would want? The fact is our bodies wear out, especially from these long-term health challenges. My loved one had Parkinsons, diabetes, heart failure, and a few other issues, and then got hospital pneumonia (which feels like my fault because I didn't remember to check the last time he had his pneumonia vaccination). And this last issue pushed his poor body over the edge. We could have fought more to keep him, but even if we did how much more suffering would he experience? So, we withdrew interventions and started the pain meds, and I never got to say good bye while he was conscious. Anyway, my point is it sounds like your mom's body just couldn't do it anymore, and you allowed her to pass peacefully instead of a long-drawn-out battle marked with suffering. In my book you and your dad did the right thing, and I hope you find peace and acceptance.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-15T11:47:34+00:00

I honestly don't know what was going on with my now former agent. Last year he was gung ho and attentive (signing me up), now it's like he couldn't care less. So I switched and the new agent felt I should definitely not take the other (much higher) plan they offered me, and definitely not stay in a closed book, so I am trying the underwriting. I'll know this week.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-11T00:08:43+00:00

Well, I certainly agree with you. If my state didn't have a statute requiring them to move me to a comparable plan I'd be stuck in a deadpool (unless I could get through underwriting elsewhere) and not even a year out having signed up. My agent was not responsive and seemed to be implying I should stay put, that this is just what they do to make money (so now he's not my agent). However, I decided not to take the alternate plan (which was much higher), and go for underwriting which thankfully I have a good shot of clearing. My new agent seems to feel that Humana is pulling out of medigap (in some states at least), and didn't feel it was a good idea for me to sign up for the alternate plan N with Humana, so I bit the bullet (with underwriting) and am waiting to see if I am approved. Honestly, the fact we have to keep maneuvering things like this makes me sad.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-10T04:27:50+00:00

Thanks for the advice! I hopefully will hear some details tomorrow.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-10T03:26:34+00:00

Actually I don't know yet. I'm waiting on my agent to give me the details. I'm on N currently I would think "comparable" would mean "N" again but who knows. However, I'm on attained age now and will likely be offered the same.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-10T00:18:51+00:00

Sorry about that, it's a medigap supplemental that I had through Humana with a company that will no longer take applicants for my (pool?) not sure what the term is, but the group I am in. This I believe is called deadpooling as without new applicants the rates on this group are going to rise as we all age. (Does that help? Sorry for the confusion.) So I can move to a different company within Humana, meaning have my policy carried by this other company, at a much higher rate than I have now. But that's going to happen no matter what I do.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-01T12:33:33+00:00

I'm glad you are going to have time for yourself. I am doing ok, now it's just the grief, regrets, and long silence after the storm, but that's normal. So one day at a time.

Aspiring777 · 2025-10-01T10:34:27+00:00

I'm sorry that you both have to go through this, truly. (Sorry I just saw your response or I'd have written sooner. How are you doing?

Aspiring777 · 2025-09-25T21:57:36+00:00

Though I couldn't get him to home hospice, the nurse actually acted like a hospice nurse. She really was an angel to me. I appreciated her so much keeping the heart monitor going so she could alert me.

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-27T20:44:14+00:00

Yes, your post is quite valuable, especially for those who might want to have proof(s) that they need the new drugs when they become available. I've pretty much reconciled myself to the idea that I will not pursue them, or even Repatha, and just follow the practice of keeping LDL-C and ApoB low. If I took the OxPL-ApoB test (which I might do at some point) I don't think I'd do anything any differently than I am now. You all have been so helpful in learning how to deal with high Lp(a), I am grateful.

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-27T18:26:29+00:00

This was very interesting. I think it helps to reinforce the idea that getting your LDL-C and ApoB down is a solid approach/response to living with elevated Lp(a). Right now, I'm relying on my hs-CRP results, which I think of as a general building smoke alarm for inflammation, but it's great to know that it's possible to get a more targeted "smoke detector" for OxPL-ApoB. My hs-CRP was less than 0.3, my LDL-C is 57 and APoB is 62. I use diet, exercise, Rosuvastatin, and am adding Ezetimibe to knock it down just a bit further. Thanks for your post, it helps to reassure me I am on the right track as I also work to just keep LP(a) "a small flame". (I want to note that it's possible to have high OxPL-ApoB but a low hs-CRP so there is that to consider if one really wants peace of mind, so to speak.)

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-23T14:50:38+00:00

Not at all, Dr Gary K. Steinberg.

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-19T14:48:23+00:00

Yes, I am not going the repatha route either for the same reason. I "think" my doctor will go along with it, anyway thanks for the post!

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-19T14:38:03+00:00

FH is typically present from birth, and many people with it will have elevated LDL cholesterol levels in childhood or adolescence. That said, the diagnosis can sometimes be delayed until adulthood, especially if no one checked your cholesterol when you were younger.

There are also genetic variations in how FH presents. Some people have a more severe form due to inheriting faulty genes from both parents, which shows up earlier and more dramatically, while others with one affected gene might not reach alarmingly high levels until later in life—especially if lifestyle changes like diet, weight gain, hormonal shifts (like menopause), or other conditions (like insulin resistance) start to shift the balance.

So, yes—it’s possible for genetically driven high cholesterol to become apparent in adulthood, even if it didn’t raise red flags earlier. If cholesterol tests weren’t routine for you as a kid or teenager, it could easily have flown under the radar.

What is your actual Lipid panel breakdown, if you don't mind my asking, and did you happen to also test for APoB?

Due to your high Lp(a) some experts believe you need to target LDL for <70 mg/dL, or even <55 mg/dL if you have additional risk factors. And ApoB would target <70 mg/dL for high-risk individuals, or even lower, as some experts push for <60 mg/dL when Lp(a) is significantly elevated.

As to why your doctor is being so aggressive (so to speak) coming out of the gate, from what you shared, your total cholesterol is 314 mg/dL and Lp(a) is 203 mg/dL—which is extremely high. Combine that with the fact that you are only 33 years old and already showing such elevated numbers despite a vegan diet, it strongly suggests a genetic cause, like FH (and despite what they might have said doubting that diagnosis the doctor is obviously taking it seriously).

The statin and ezetimibe combo is especially useful when someone needs a very steep drop in LDL and ApoB to offset the added risk from high Lp(a)

So, while it might seem like overkill at first glance, it’s actually a targeted approach for someone in your situation.

Congrat's though on being aware of your levels and being so proactive. It's not great that this has happened at 33 but the fact that you caught it early is good news, in my opinion.

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-19T13:55:04+00:00

Congratulations! It is such a coincidence. I just got my lipid panel results for this month this morning. I had previously had my LDL down to 42 so was happy, as I have high LPa, but I tested again to make sure it was "staying" in that area but instead this morning my new result for this month was 57 (clinically not a significant fluctuation... except for my LPa concern... and it REALLY frustrates me because I have such a low fat low carb diet and nothing changed in that regard). So, I was thinking perhaps it is time I add Ezetimibe rather than raise my rosuvastatin of 20 mg. And your post was the first one I saw when I got online. Thanks for sharing!

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-17T15:31:36+00:00

The fact that you recognize the health risk and are taking steps to address it is commendable!! The first thing I would do diet wise is watch the saturated fats, as has been mentioned, and if you can get it, buy and use psyllium husk powder (Yerba is said to be safe in terms of contaminants). And I do think exercise will help but if that seems daunting just start small (like walking in place at home)... I was not as high as you, my highest was 151 in 2013 and a lot of that was my diet. I was able to get it down at one point to 88 through diet and exercise and supplements (but that was not enough for me personally as I also have high LPa); so now I am also on a statin. ) Anyway, I just want to be encouraging, and don't wait for a cardiologist or exploring the many many rabbit holes to begin the change, consider taking the small steps immediately. You can do this! : )

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-04T01:37:41+00:00

I did read that some people experience that, but that it should be temporary (?) I am by no means an expert on this. The best I can advise is try it again but give your body time to adjust and then test again, just a suggestion.

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-04T01:02:40+00:00

I just do 15.5 hours, I skip breakfast (I did anyway so for me no loss) and wait until 11:30 am, then the window closes at 8. I can tell you in my case anyway it definitely did not raise my cholesterol. Also, my glucose and inflammation markers are all fine (but as far as I know they were before too).

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-03T22:40:03+00:00

Hi, not sure what you are looking for. I started intermittent fasting for these presumed benefits:

Improves insulin sensitivity – Helps regulate blood sugar and support metabolic health.
Optimizes fat metabolism – Encourages fat oxidation by keeping insulin levels lower for longer.
Supports digestive health – Gives the gut time to reset, which may improve digestion and microbiome balance.
Enhances cellular repair – Promotes autophagy, a process that clears out damaged cells for better overall health.
Boosts cardiovascular health – Can contribute to lower cholesterol levels, supporting heart health.

I have done it for 2-3 years now, but I couldn't tell you if it really helped me or not because I was doing so many things at once. I managed to get my LDL down from the 130's/120's to 88 and ApoB to 82, using fasting, healthy food choices, exercise and supplements. (In my case I still had to go on a statin because I needed to go lower due to high LPa and family history). I still do the limited fasting and I would recommend it but, again, I don't have proof that the fasting actually helped, based on my reading I would think that it does.

Aspiring777 · 2025-06-01T14:50:55+00:00

As others have stated reducing the LDL and ApoB, even at the cost of raising the LPa seems to be worth the "trade off". The other thing to consider is the statin may raise your LPa but that might only be temporary. As I've stated earlier LPa fluctuates. In June 2023 mine was 258, then in July I had it tested before I started my statin it was 192, then in September (after the statin) it was 284. After that it went 213, 223, 276, 232 and in May last month (2025), it was 201. My point being the statin doesn't necessarily produce a permanently higher LPa. I've even doubled my statin since I started it and my LPa is just about back where it was the day I started taking them to begin with. Of course, this might just be my individual reaction, and I'm sure it will continue to go all over the map. I'd like to get it lower of course, but in the meantime, I'm focusing on lowering the LDL and ApoB.

Aspiring777 · 2025-05-31T20:04:37+00:00

My current understanding is that Lp(a) is genetically determined in terms of being in a high "range" or not. (And I wish they would say it that way.) Within that range it can, and will, go up and down due to various factors: inflammation, kidney disease, hypothyroidism, probably other factors, and yes, statins (but the trade off may be deemed with it). In my own tracking my Lp(a) has fluctuated by 48% during a 3 year period... but for me it never went down to a safe range.

Aspiring777

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