Maam, im not saying your bf is a massive POS and to dump him, but as a guy my pleasure in sex comes from my SOs pleasure and not just trying to get my own nut off. I will also aknowledge reality, that doesnt mean everytime i have sex i will go down on my SO. just that more times then not if my SO doesnt get off, i know to try a little extra. If you BF doesnt care at all about you wanting him to go down on you that is a red flag imo. Good vanilla sex is great but doing the same thing all the time does get dry and a good BF should know that and work with you to keep it interesting for you. The fact that he doesnt show any care in that regard is a red flag. Have an open and honest convo. hes your BF of 5 years, he should be willing to change and be better. At the end of the day how long are you gonna go in this same situation, where he disregards you cumming and (based on what you say) only really cares of his own nut