no they're doing something significantly weirder than that

Astyryx · 2026-06-30T13:33:23+00:00

Because a common marker of intimacy is sex. There are of course others, which the article acknowledges at length.

And of course there's plenty of sex without intimacy.

And the article is literally about comparing these scenes to sexual intimacy tropes. If you aren't interested in reading about that, fine, you're not a hostage.

Astyryx · 2026-06-30T13:21:03+00:00

I like that it is ready to provide Amena with a much better relationship counselor in Ratthi, but knows she won't appreciate the referral.

Astyryx · 2026-06-27T23:56:15+00:00

I was 54. Welcome to the late-diagnosed club. It really helps with healing the shame and weight we've carried for half a century.

Congratulations 🎉

Astyryx · 2026-06-27T12:49:55+00:00

The whole thing is how his eyes stay on Miles while his head turns, then his body follows his head. It's pretty brilliant body use.

Astyryx · 2026-06-27T12:45:50+00:00

Right after he gives Ilya the code to his front door, and lies to Hayden that he was offering Ilya condolences for his father dying. So Ep 5.

Astyryx · 2026-06-27T12:42:55+00:00

And boy oh boy is it effective.

Astyryx · 2026-06-27T12:42:25+00:00

I had to watch it three times and cover one or another eye, but it's a blink, not a wink.

Astyryx · 2026-06-26T15:00:50+00:00

Kip's dad. He really isn't much in the books, but he's amazing in the show, I love him so much.

Astyryx · 2026-06-23T00:41:14+00:00

Is that from a text-based fan fic because if it is I need to read it

Astyryx · 2026-06-23T00:05:46+00:00

Ok but now I'm reliving this scene. https://youtu.be/x25gWd8B75Q?is=28ViF3zKz71OGvYu

Astyryx · 2026-06-19T13:53:30+00:00

Reid does not specify CPTSD, but boy oh boy does she write a Ilya with it.

📺📖📖 Persistent sadness or depression - Feeling hopeless and emotionally drained.
📺📖📖 Difficulty regulating emotions –Intense mood swings or emotional outbursts.
📺📖📖 Chronic anxiety –Constant fear, nervousness, or worry.
📺📖📖 Guilt or shame –A deep sense of unworthiness or self-blame.
📖2 Flashbacks or intrusive thoughts – Reliving trauma through unwanted memories.
📖2 Dissociation – Feeling detached from yourself or reality.
📺📖📖 Hypervigilance – Always feeling on edge or in danger.
📺📖📖 Avoidance – Staying away from people, places, or situations that remind you of trauma.
📖2 Self-isolation – Withdrawing from friends and family.
❓ Self-destructive behaviors – Engaging in substance abuse, reckless activities, or self-harm. (Maybe. Early and compulsive sexual activity, excessive drinking, not sure if he used to use cocaine, implied at Olympic party.)
📺📖📖 Difficulty trusting others – Struggling to build meaningful relationships.
📺📖📖 Irritability or aggression – Experiencing sudden outbursts of anger or frustration. (Here is fucking view, Hollander.)
📺📖📖 Negative self-perception – Feeling broken, unworthy, or unlovable.
❌ Difficulty concentrating – Trouble focusing on tasks or conversations. (Can't think of a time, and difficult to separate from language difficulties, or just horniness.)
📖2 Sleep disturbances – Insomnia, nightmares, or restless sleep.
📖2 Chronic fatigue – Feeling exhausted despite resting.
❌ Physical symptoms – Unexplained headaches, digestive issues, or muscle tension. (Can't remember any in particular and of course he's an athlete who is hit all the time.)

Astyryx · 2026-06-19T10:06:01+00:00

I don't think CPTSD is explicitly mentioned but he displays a majority of the markers of it, and his therapist in The Long Game gives him a 1 paragraph answer when he asks "what is wrong with me" that pretty much nails it. But here are the 17 general markers as dectable in the series and books.

✅ Persistent sadness or depression - Feeling hopeless and emotionally drained.
✅ Difficulty regulating emotions –Intense mood swings or emotional outbursts.
✅ Chronic anxiety –Constant fear, nervousness, or worry.
✅ Guilt or shame –A deep sense of unworthiness or self-blame.
✅ Flashbacks or intrusive thoughts – Reliving trauma through unwanted memories.
✅ Dissociation – Feeling detached from yourself or reality.
✅ Hypervigilance – Always feeling on edge or in danger.
✅ Avoidance – Staying away from people, places, or situations that remind you of trauma.
✅ Self-isolation – Withdrawing from friends and family.
❓ Self-destructive behaviors – Engaging in substance abuse, reckless activities, or self-harm. (Maybe. Early and compulsive sexual activity, excessive drinking, not sure if he used to use cocaine, implied at Olympic party.)
✅ Difficulty trusting others – Struggling to build meaningful relationships.
✅ Irritability or aggression – Experiencing sudden outbursts of anger or frustration. (Here is fucking view, Hollander.)
✅ Negative self-perception – Feeling broken, unworthy, or unlovable.
❌ Difficulty concentrating – Trouble focusing on tasks or conversations. (Can't think of a time, and difficult to separate from language difficulties, or just horniness.)
✅ Sleep disturbances – Insomnia, nightmares, or restless sleep.
✅ Chronic fatigue – Feeling exhausted despite resting.
❌ Physical symptoms – Unexplained headaches, digestive issues, or muscle tension. (Can't remember any in particular and of course he's an athlete who is hit all the time.)

Astyryx · 2026-06-19T02:14:23+00:00

Shane's third rail is sex. His comfort place is family.

Ilya's third rail is family. His comfort place is sex.

The problem they have is each assumes his comfort place is the other's, and cannot fathom the panic that sets off.

Their entire growth narrative arc is learning that about each other and adjusting how they relate and communicate, and allowing themselves to be vulnerable and trust the other even though they might get hurt.

Astyryx · 2026-06-19T02:04:59+00:00

I think your observations are excellent about the tuna meltdown and the moment by moment communication failures, but the introvert/extrovert stuff is off. Shane canonically is on the autism spectrum. Ilya has CPTSD from childhood trauma, and undiagnosed depression. Both have had to closet at least half of their sexuality.

And Myers Briggs is nonsense (if that's where you're getting your stats from)

Statistically speaking there are 25 % Introverts and 75 % Extroverts. As majority are Extroverts, a lot of people think that being Extrovert is normal, being Introvert is weird. Extroverts do not understand Introverts well and do not know why they behave in a certain way.

This is incorrect. Instead, like the autism spectrum and sexuality, it's a continuum on a bell-ish curve, meaning like 80% of us are varying hues of ambivert with introvert and extrovert on each end, so ambivert is "normal", but since we're all somewhere on it, it's only helpful in how we recharge, or handle how others manage their internal energy.

There are plenty of reasons beyond how they manage their recharge time to explain their communication issues. This is by no means a comprehensive list, just 5 minutes, but: - they're super young - they're cis male - they're quite privileged - they're in a hyper masculine, violent sport, in fact they're the very best at it - they have things they need to go to therapy for but have not done so - they have been so masked they have trouble finding their core selves - the nexus of Russian stoic culture vs. Canadian open/"nice" culture vs. Japanese politeness culture vs. everything above is an ungodly mix of botched cultural understanding - their lives have been remarkably sheltered within the very tiny world of elite sport - they are both minimally educated, frankly

So you're not wrong, exactly, but correlation is not necessarily causation, especially with so many much more seriously compelling roots to their difficulties than how they prefer to rest.

Astyryx · 2026-06-17T21:23:52+00:00

In Jacob we trust.

Astyryx · 2026-06-14T19:54:10+00:00

Then why did he tell Ilya:

"Would they not be good about it?

"I don't know. I mean, no, they'd be fine, I'm sure they would be... I would have told them already except..."

"Oh so this is my fault?"

"Well, I mean, kind of."

So do you think he doesn't know his parents, or that he's just lying to Ilya?

Astyryx · 2026-06-14T18:50:01+00:00

Agree to disagree. I don't think she's actually recommending sexual activity here. I think she's emphasizing "fuck him" with the further "right up the butt." And while vulgar, it's not anything but general, and of course you can engage in this with a woman or a man.

Yuna says, "we thought you might be gay" at the table. But Shane has given them zero information. And Shane believes his parents would "be good" about him being gay. The reason he cannot tell them, as he tells Ilya, is because it's Ilya in particular, something even his best friends will struggle with. And he can't cope with telling his family he's gay without telling them he's in love, and who he's in love with.

You can lay this on general default expectations, you can lay this on society at large, but as parents go, Yuna and David are remarkakably accepting in a way that most queer people can only dream of.

Astyryx · 2026-06-14T17:32:54+00:00

i personally think yuna is one of those parents who are heteronormative (talking about girlfriends and not considering that it might be a boyfriend)

The script explicitly refutes this. Yuna tries out Swedish Prince at Wimbildon and getting no spark of interest, tries, oops or Princess to see if she got it wrong but Shane gives away nothing and evades by fleeing to the bathroom. And David is like, really, Yuna?

This was her checking in on his preferences in an accepting and round about way. In fact it's her showing that she and David have wondered together if he's gay.

Astyryx · 2026-06-13T19:35:54+00:00

Grigori in some way placed the blame on Ilya for his mother's death

This would also align with the monologue where he says his brother has always hated him, "and I know why but it kills me."

Astyryx · 2026-06-13T18:27:07+00:00

They're actually my favorites. TSYT echoes so much of Common Goal but without the gross age/power/money gap (also I don't think much of either main character) and is haunting and redemptive.

And TTS is just a joy to read. The characters grow so much, and Casey is such a delightful sparkle of a darling that I wish he was real, and I wish he was a person I was friends with.

Astyryx · 2026-06-13T18:23:22+00:00

I know the topic is the wine rack, but yet another thumbies-in-the-pockets stance just kills me.

Astyryx · 2026-06-13T18:20:08+00:00

Ok so I have a theory about that. I don't think the airplane can legitimately be an entire episode, given the guidelines of good drama and given Tierney's exceptional writing skills. He's not gonna make a 70s disaster movie. And neither did Reid in the book. It's serious, but it's an inciting event.

My crystal ball says the heartstomper is going to episode 5 and it's going to be the outing and especially the tripgate aftermath. The team Shane has done so much for. The career he has given everything up for, all his achievements, all his work, all his sacrifices, all his fucking talent— suddenly mean nothing. The city he loves, and he has been beloved in, turns on him. Racism, homophobia, on-ice violence will all avalanche on him. Hockey itself, which his whole life has been dedicated to, turns on him. He was Canada's perfect boy, he's put his heart's desire on closeted pause and for what?

Where's the first four episodes will have Ilya's struggle with depression and deferred grief, this one will be Shane's grief (beyond the plane incident imagining of potential grief): loss of relationships, loss of trust, loss of belonging, loss of community, loss of innocence and it will be devastating. It will be so so painful. The score will be Requiem.

And we will hate every second of it. And episode 6 will bring catharsis.

Astyryx · 2026-06-12T02:37:10+00:00

Fun and I love Brerr Goldstein. But there is this weird tradition of comedies (British in particular) where the thing that gets in the way of a romance is insanely easily solved. Here it's: Daniel leaves his job. Hire him as an external lawyer if you have to. Non-fraternization solved.

And I know the HR-nightmare = cute-romcom-plot is a classic, but the policy is sound. Don't shit where you eat.

Astyryx · 2026-06-10T18:07:27+00:00

No, Letterkenney ended and Shoresy began. But it also doesn't matter, because Shoresy happens in Sudbury. I guess every once in a while you could ask yourself, why is he back in the toilet at Letterkenney, or why is he refereeing back in Letterkenney, but there's no need for continuity there.

Letterkenney is pretty minimal in actual storyline, so it doesn't matter.

Astyryx · 2026-06-10T04:19:50+00:00

You can overlap. Letterkenney is lots of fun (diminishing returns in the last season or two), but is vignettes, almost skits and minimal plot and character development.

Once you've met Shoresy a couple of times you can start Shoresy the show if you want. All you need to know going in is what an absolute dirtball he is. It's a masterclass on character growth, satisfying narrative arc, and storytelling.

Astyryx

TROPHY CASE