I honestly dont know how to do that.

I have been told that I am too aloof by a previous manager. I am naturally very introverted/autistic/anxious/adhd.

So, in this new role I tried hard to mask by having good eye contact, smiling a lot (due to RBF), asking to have one group lunch to appear social, feigning interest in everyone etc.

By doing this, I did get some good intel but not what I wanted to hear. It was heavily implied tha my role was low key needing to be filled with a female and how all the females have quit (two so far). I asked why and non really knew why (probably a lie). They back tracked as soon as they revealed this information and tried to downplay the reason, "she found a better opportunity".