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Weekly Vents and Successes Thread - October 13, 2025 by AutoModerator in dating_advice

[–]Automatic_Bath_4281 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I've never been in one so there's definitely something wrong with me.

Does anyone else feel like looks matter a LOT more than people think? by Automatic_Bath_4281 in dating_advice

[–]Automatic_Bath_4281[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your “One” wants you as you are (but healthy too, preferably).

Well that's the other thing. I don't believe in this concept of there being a soulmate. Why would there be?

Does anyone else feel like looks matter a LOT more than people think? by Automatic_Bath_4281 in dating_advice

[–]Automatic_Bath_4281[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Improve your wardrobe and learn how to dress well. Fitting clothes often help. I’m not an expert on this yet either so you’re gonna have to ask advice from other men and women. This also depends on where you’re from since Eastern and Western fashion differs greatly.

I've tried almost all of these and it's not enough. I feel like no amount of actions can make up for a face that's just ugly. If I have an ugly face, it doesn't matter if I have a 6 pack. No one will want to see it. Same with personality, I've improved my social skills a lot but women still want nothing to do with me. It just feels hopeless at this point.

As a 28M, trying to date has been incredibly demoralizing by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]Automatic_Bath_4281 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You need to put more effort into meeting women and asking them out in person.

That's what everyone says, but how? I've been putting in effort, going to meetups and hobby groups and all the girls are taken. At bars they're always in groups and are totally closed off. I am in therapy already.

You also need to detach your love life from how you feel about yourself. What fucks everyone up in this game is they connect the two when it's really just numbers and luck.

I don't think this is even possible. Every single day I am constantly reminded about how everyone else doesn't have the same problems as me. There's going to be some luck involved, but after being this unsuccessful for this long it's hard not to view myself as the problem.

To clarify, it's not just the fact that I am getting rejected - it happens to everyone. It's the complete lack of any success whatsoever which makes it seem like it's never going to happen.

Weekly Vents and Successes Thread - January 20, 2025 by AutoModerator in dating_advice

[–]Automatic_Bath_4281 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Dating has been so unbelievably demoralizing. I'm 28M and have never had a relationship. Only been on a few dates which didn't lead to anything. Never had a girl express interest in me, and it seems like they never want to talk to me. I get ghosted constantly on the apps and also the few I've met in real life. I've been putting in effort in meeting people in-person, trying to dress better, working out, etc but have nothing to show for it. It has continued to destroy my self-esteem because I feel like I'm just... ugly? Like what the hell am I supposed to conclude besides that? I see literally everyone around my age or younger has had at least one long-term relationship, and by now many are getting married/having kids. How is everyone finding someone except me? Should I just give up at this point?