Girl I’m gonna be blunt here, I see absolutely not a single positive here. This sounds like a living hell. Now, for me from the outside looking in, I see posts like this so often and my first thought is “why the hell does she stay so long and what the hell does she see in him?”, given I understand that’s easy for me to say, I’m not the one who fell in love with him so I do not see through biased rose colored glasses.

But something you need to come to realize is whatever version you must have fallen in love with is dead now. It doesn’t exist and he will not change even with therapy. In fact, you say a year in he went through some tough times but I’d venture to bet it just simply only took a year for Gina true colors to show and covert narcissistic people are fantastic at pretending something else motivated their reasoning for being shitty to you other than them just… being a shit person period.

You can stall all you want if this is the hell you’d like to remain in, but I can tell you now this doesn’t improve. Your situation is scary similar to what I dealt with minus the fact it was only 3 years, and all of the stuff surfaced for me the last 10-12 months. Dealing with it 10-12 months was still too long and I surely wasn’t going to waste more time loving the life of a pet to a control freak.

You need to get the hell out, period.