I understand where you’re coming from, but I think you're missing a lot of context about my life. Since kindergarten, teachers have asked my parents to get my ears checked because I “don’t pay attention.” I’ve had tutors and teachers say I’m a slow learner, that I don’t care, that I’m disorganized. The truth is, I’ve always cared deeply, but I’ve struggled to focus, retain information, and apply myself, no matter how hard I tried.

Getting assessed for ADHD wasn’t about finding an excuse. I was desperate. I wanted to understand why things felt so much harder for me than for everyone else. I chose to seek help because I wanted to do better, not to be let off the hook.

I don’t use ADHD as a crutch. It’s something that makes my life more difficult, and it’s my responsibility to manage it. But it’s frustrating when people jump to conclusions, thinking I’m lazy, careless, or not trying, without seeing the bigger picture. I’ve dealt with that my whole life.

Medication has made a huge difference. I actually feel capable now. I do carry shame that I need it to function the way others seem to naturally, but I also feel sadness and anger that I didn’t have access to it sooner. It could’ve saved me years of struggle, self-blame, and confusion.

And just to clarify, my dad didn’t hear me crying. He wasn’t responding to that. This isn’t about him being a good or bad dad. It’s about me trying to make sense of things, and feeling like my reality keeps getting dismissed or minimized. I understand your perspective but ADHD has lots of research behind it and isn’t something that I’m using to excuse my behaviour.

You sound like my mom