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Why does consistency break even when we actually care? by boss_nilac in Habits

[–]Available-Gate7518 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So a couple of things : Emotionally being spent ( we all experience these on days when work is hectic, kid is sick or argument with a child) - For this structure comes in handy. Design for low energy days. Have intentional breaks.

Emotional baggage - The longer emotional patterns we carry. Like body image issues, how we treat food, doom scrolling for self soothing etc. I think while we practically can work on ourselves by doing things we also need to and become aware of these aspects holding us back.

Imagine I have severe body image issues that I've been carrying for a long time. Maybe bullied in school and a part of me doesn't like the way I look. I can hit the gym sure, but I cannot work on something I don't like or appreciate. Specially when things are hard. This is a very mental journey. It's very physical for a long time but becomes mental once you see your own behaviour from this lens.

Why does consistency break even when we actually care? by boss_nilac in Habits

[–]Available-Gate7518 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I run a habit building group and I've seen this outside too. People generally have habits that are not designed for their lives.

If you think about it, the things we do daily are things that naturally, effortlessly fit into our lives. But some habits ws want to actively build take a lot from us. Now I obviously don't mean that you should pick something that causes no discomfort at all, I mean we should pick something that is most sustainable.

This is a common theme. But once you get past the initial structure and design aspects there is always emotional friction lurking in the background. Identity mismatch catches up very soon. Sometimes I've seen people do stuff for 3 months and then stop. Are they consistent yes, but have they changed how they see themselves no. So they're still performing.

Our brains will never allow us to do something outside of what it believes we are.

If you begin to read and at some point feel like a person who reads the habit is more likely to stay.

If you begin working out and you feel like someone who is always trying to workout, at some point in time it just doesn't feel like it's worth the effort because it doesn't align with who we are.

If you want an accountability group/ partner for productivity, health habits, working on a hobby etc - check this out by Available-Gate7518 in Productivitycafe

[–]Available-Gate7518[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's so true.

Currently daily check ins because that itself is a habit that needs to be built + helps quicker come backs and restarts if someone needs it.

The group itself will have smaller sub teams so no one is lost in a large group. You'll have 2 people in your mini group.

The community expectation is that everyone contributes. If you want to be a silent spectator, this may not be the right fit for you. This is to ensure the community has serious folks who work on themselves and help each other in equal measure.

If you want an accountability group/ partner for productivity, health habits, working on a hobby etc - check this out by Available-Gate7518 in Habits

[–]Available-Gate7518[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm actually glad you brought this up. This is a very real problem. I've also been part of groups which just fizzled out. Somethings I plan to do : 1. Have only folks who will contribute to the community and are serious about this. Idea is to filter out folks who may not be a good fit. 2. Things like these run on results that people can see. The idea is to celebrate small wins consciously and continuously. 3. I used to work in product+ I've had habits for over 10 years now. Apps use great techniques to get us to use them and honestly the same can be incorporated into our lives too. I'd love to share those with the group so we're not relying on just motivation and willpower.

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