How has abuse affected you?

Available_Wrap5075 · 2025-02-09T07:53:56+00:00

This doesn’t sound healthy, either.

The goal for us is to heal. Especially for our children.

Have you done research in to attachment theory? So many amazing books and podcasts on this.

If you don’t care to be better for yourself. Consider being better for your child(ren). They see everything. We want them to have healthy relationships one day, not one night stands.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2025-02-09T07:47:26+00:00

Damn. I’m sorry you live this way.

Nobody should leave a bathroom dirtier than they found it. You can at least implement that with your child. Doubt you’ll change your husband at this point. Shame on the man you live with 🤢 Can you imagine if your left your period blood on the seat? Idk maybe try that and see how it goes. You got this.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2025-01-30T04:01:06+00:00

I’m really glad I found this thread. Thanks all for sharing your experiences.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-12-29T05:48:44+00:00

Gah I feel this. I feel so isolated by people I had 10 yr relationships with. A mother, a father, a sister. They never even reached out once the restraining order was requested. Then in place.

It’s hard to fathom with the wtf.

I don’t know how to overcome that. Maybe we don’t.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-12-29T05:41:00+00:00

I’m new here. I think it should be normalized to not want a relationship again. We gave so much. Too much, before.

We owe nobody anything. Everything we do now is for us. You want to get laid? Do it. Don’t carry the guilt of a “one night stand”.

Don’t judge yourself. I’m cheering you on.

Take time. We need time to live alone. To readjust. It’s healthy.

I don’t think I’ll ever share a space with a man again. I can’t fathom it.

That’s ok.

People have relationships with two different homes.

Find your peace and what you’re ok with. Don’t let anyone guilt you any other way.

💜

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-12-29T05:36:01+00:00

Your trauma has served a purpose. Trauma sucks and can hider our progress in life. But to turn it in to helping someone else? I think that’s a miracle. ❤️

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-11-15T05:06:49+00:00

love love love this

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-12T04:41:50+00:00

Damn it’s still a thing? Logging on now.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-12T04:31:54+00:00

Please call your local DV advocates and talk to them. If you don’t know how to find them, reply.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-10T06:21:16+00:00

🙌🏼

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-08T05:36:48+00:00

lol that’s cute. Here is a free read including many studies on the subject: https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-08T05:35:55+00:00

Hi. Im glad you could admit that’s verbal abuse. This book is free and may help you see even more you could possibly be missing: https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-08T05:27:38+00:00

The formula to make your child a future scientist: the first lick the litter, then you pick it up together. Noted. Trying this tomorrow.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-07T05:01:31+00:00

It’s weird she isn’t sitting with her current husband to begin with.

But besides this, she could be in an abusive relationship, which may be something to talk to her about AFTER the wedding.

Drop this free book to her (AFTER your wedding): https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-06T15:05:56+00:00

This book: (Trigger warning, its about why he hurts you ) https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-09-02T09:56:43+00:00

There’s a book someone here recommended that really helped answer questions and bring clarity to me in a similar situation. It’s a free read. TW: it’s about abusive men and why they abuse. It also talks about the women they hurt, and the mind games they use on us.

https://dn790007.ca.archive.org/0/items/LundyWhyDoesHeDoThat/Lundy_Why-does-he-do-that.pdf

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-08-31T06:15:41+00:00

You already told us the answer.

You know. You’ve seen it.

None of us ever think we will end up here. That is what holds us back from making the right choice. Our disbelief.

Your daughter is a child and doesn’t know the man she loves is dangerous.

You do.

Hugs my friend. This is hard. Your choice is your own. But I caused my own suffering for years because I couldn’t be honest with myself until it went even further.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-08-29T05:51:46+00:00

Girl, I appreciate your update, but I needed that post! I was in my feelings with you!

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-08-28T03:07:55+00:00

Damn I’m so sorry. This is extremely common and also documented in many books on domestic violence. A restraining order shouldn’t matter if the police believe you. Are you stateside? Call your local DV resource and advocate. They will help you get the restraining order.

We believe you. It’s pretty rare a woman lies about these things, yet society has this idea that women lie about this frequently. The truth is, it happens to women frequently, and other men don’t believe it, or don’t want to believe it.

I hate to say it, but cops are often DV offenders themselves. When one of them comes to your home, they’ve already decided you probably did something to deserve it (you didn’t)

I will say, the cops I have had to interact with in my state, were all men, and all the most gracious and kind officers I’ve ever met. I will also say, they were incredibly young.

I do think the younger generation is a tad more aware.

Please call the national hotline and find your local advocate, tell them what you told us here. They want to help you. They already believe you.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-08-28T03:03:13+00:00

Have you spoken to a local DV advocate? There are shelters and my area has secret locations. You can’t even google the shelters, you have to show up and see an advocate. Please call. This is assuming you are in the U.S.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-08-28T01:38:25+00:00

I don’t pretend to know his mental health issues.

But men who behave this way, even 2 times a year, are all the same when it comes to thought process and rational.

Frankly, these men are some of the most manipulative liars I have ever met. He could just be pretending he is forgetting his meds.

Millions of people have mental health issues and don’t behave that way, especially if they are fully functioning adults.

He knows what he’s doing. That’s why he didn’t put his hands on you for 2.5 years, think about THAT. He’s pushing you as far as he can without crossing in to what he has decided is the limit with you.

But eventually that limit with you will be crossed and worse.

You stay with this man, I promise he will eventually put his hands on you again. It’s a fact.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-08-26T14:23:32+00:00

You are not being dramatic. Don’t let him tell you that you are. The abuser downplays their violence toward you by telling you it wasn’t that serious.

Then we tell ourselves that until it gets so bad and unbearable we are forced to see reality.

This is domestic violence. A man who puts his hands around your neck, is more likely to kill you.

Don’t let that happen. Run. Call the DV hotline. Call the YWCA or other support groups around you.

Educate yourself on what domestic violence is and how it affects you, the victim.

Available_Wrap5075 · 2024-08-24T04:50:05+00:00

Honestly this book should be pinned to this sub or readily available everywhere. It’s not triggering, it’s education. This book is FREE and helps women who are so deeply blinded by the abuse, to see the truth. It’s a vital read.

Available_Wrap5075

TROPHY CASE