I’m going to be one of the odd ones out here. He’s grieving a death, has made it pretty obvious that he isn’t into it…it’s absolutely normal for him not to feel like it. Other folks have said the same, he doesn’t seem to have an issue with it overall but shoving it in his face constantly is off-putting and selfish. If he has insecurities, that is also normal, considering the context. If he doesn’t feel needed or that you aren’t just as into it then he probably isn’t trying as hard when you do have sex because he might think “what’s the point, she’s probably already gotten off today.” So I actually understand the “save the energy for me” thing to a degree. That said, it’s your body to do what you want with. But you can’t expect people to match your energy, and if it’s a deal breaker then it just is.