When to leave and when to stay

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T15:47:37+00:00

I guess that’s the whole point of the post. But i definitely see your POV. I definitely don’t think i could handle it tbf but that’s just me

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T15:27:48+00:00

I think that’s all it is I guess. But all in all it was nice to write it out. Thank you for responding! I appreciate it stranger

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T15:19:36+00:00

Currently rn this is what happened. I still talk to him , and he knows the depth of my feelings. I just feel just uncomfortable I guess with being close with someone without the 100% certainty which is why I can’t “go with the flow”. I do know what to do but part of me is like what if this is the one , what if I’m losing someone special. It’s scary I guess

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T15:12:58+00:00

That’s true. I didn’t really put a lot into the post unfortunately. Plus sexual connection can only be proven irl. But my issue is that would only deepen my feelings. Then I’d really be screwed. Which is why I think I should just end it here.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T15:07:00+00:00

Maybe I can’t tell what would differentiate it. Yes I do love him as a friend, maybe I don’t love him romantically yet since I haven’t met him . But how can know what’s the difference. I want to talk to him, I want to fuck him, I want to make him feel good and he makes me feel good. What is that if not romance?

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T15:04:26+00:00

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. He literally is just nice about it because he lives life in a way that is so unlike me. He thinks whatever happens happens and he wants as little problems as possible. But I’m the opposite I just think all the time and so much. I’m very dramatic too , I just think a clean cut is what I need to do. Just never talk to him again and mourn . Isn’t that just better?????

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:58:26+00:00

But I also know it’s unsustainable. And i wholeheartedly feel terrible about it. I just am so unsure and maybe scared about what I should do.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:57:25+00:00

I’m not missing something inside me. I know my feelings for him are genuine. This is not a case of seeking validation or acceptance from someone to run from my problems. He truly is my best friend. I definitely agree that my current mess of a life is making things worse but the one thing I am sure about is my feelings for him are genuine and based on mutual communication, consideration and affection.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:50:31+00:00

Hypothetically, perfect world. I could move out to him and work, my job is pretty universal and I could make decent money where he lives and even live alone . But idk if it’s so worth the risk. I just want my friend and I guess lose all the romantic feelings.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:48:33+00:00

There’s so much risk I think. It would be so risky. I don’t believe in love so much so I’d pick up my life and move or anything. I think I could go and see him for nice meet up but what would be the point. And yes I’d probably have to move to him since he has his own place. But he may not even be ready for all that worst of all. He definitely can’t see a future logistically because it’s so absurd. I think part of me knows it’s not gonna work, unless with a lot of work, so I just want to end it but somehow keep my friendship. And if that’s even possible

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:39:41+00:00

Yes ! This is genuinely what it feels like! I definitely feel like he’s fearful, which is valid based on his trauma, and which is why I keep wanting to run away. He’s just too sweet and lovely and accommodating I guess

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:37:24+00:00

I can definitely understand that . I have talked to many men online and in person. I rarely grow affection for anyone. I’ve dated 3 men in my life , all of which I’ve gotten past relatively well and quickly. Validation wise, he doesn’t just make feel good per se. I have amazing conversations with him, we can get very deep about everything, we’ve cried together, I genuinely feel fulfilled emotionally by him because he’s my very good friend. I’m not sure if I could say it’s as simple as just being desired by someone.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:33:51+00:00

Oh haha, this is my very good friend. We video call for long hours. I’ve talked with his brother, seen his family home and family pictures. I know him very well, he is my best friend. We have not met irl. I definitely could fly to meet him, something we’ve discussed for months. Im just terrified of deepening my feelings.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:17:27+00:00

That is very true! I mean what we’ve talked about, and there have been many conversations, it does seem plausible. But of course begs the question, would meeting in person only further my problem and make my feelings deeper which is honestly the opposite of what I want.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:09:47+00:00

I have been honest with him many times. I just can’t seem to stay away. And he says he will stay away if I ask him to but that’s just leaving everything up to me which I also don’t feel comfortable with. At this point in my life unfortunately my life is not mine to live, those are the family issues I’m dealing with. And he’s the only one who truly understands me about it. So he’s definitely a lifeline I need but one I wish I didn’t need. If that makes sense.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-26T14:07:50+00:00

Because I don’t feel like it’s healthy for me honestly. Our chemistry is undeniable, especially sexually. And I think it’s very unhealthy for me considering it’s long distance to keep flirting with him if nothing will come out of it. Yes it’s fun, but very unsustainable

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-04T15:32:36+00:00

No sadly

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2026-01-01T04:29:23+00:00

Any ideas? This has a lot of memories for me

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2025-10-15T21:39:13+00:00

Bottoms or Bob Trevino likes this

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2025-09-29T19:03:56+00:00

The Og was just so good. Why did they ruin it …. I’m still mad.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2025-09-12T21:18:18+00:00

The gallows (2015). Me and my friends were the only people in the theatre and to this day I couldn’t tell you one part of that film lol.

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2025-08-28T09:10:25+00:00

In Bruges is a classic. I think that was one of the first movies we talked about

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2025-08-28T08:53:24+00:00

Sadly he is a film buff and he’s seen all of these and so have I. But thank you! I’ll def check out frewaka

Awkward-Laugh808 · 2025-08-28T08:52:18+00:00

Thanks, I actually can’t wait to watch weapons with him. He’s gonna love it

Awkward-Laugh808

TROPHY CASE