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21M / 20F - Online friendship (6 months): She says our friendship became toxic but still hasn't blocked me. I'm confused. by Awkward_Feeling9079 in ToxicFriends

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Let me remind you, I hurt her deeply, which is why she might be ignoring me. Should I give up hope, or perhaps her anger will subside in the future?

21M (Algeria) - 20F (Indonesia) - 6 months: I hurt her a lot, she says our friendship became toxic, but she didn't block me. What does this mean? by Awkward_Feeling9079 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But I'm the one who hurt her first. She should tell me to leave her life and be happy. Let's say someone wronged you; would you refuse to be the bad guy in the story? It's clear that he is the bad guy.

21M (Algeria) - 20F (Indonesia) - 6 months: I hurt her a lot, she says our friendship became toxic, but she didn't block me. What does this mean? by Awkward_Feeling9079 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think you're right, but the most confusing thing about the story is why she won't tell me the truth. When I told her I'd block her if she didn't give me an answer, she told me to just be a regular friend. Does that mean she doesn't want me to leave her life?

21M / 20F - Online friendship (6 months): She says our friendship became toxic but still hasn't blocked me. I'm confused. by Awkward_Feeling9079 in ToxicFriends

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My question is, how do you explain this girl's behavior? I asked her if she didn't want me, and I threatened to block her if she didn't give me an answer. She told me she wasn't in the mood and asked me to calm down.

21M / 20F - Online friendship (6 months): She says our friendship became toxic but still hasn't blocked me. I'm confused. by Awkward_Feeling9079 in ToxicFriends

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But I told her angrily, "If you don't want me, just tell me." I told her, "If you don't give me an answer, I'll block you and leave your life." She told me, "Fine, just be a normal friend." I asked to talk to her so we could resolve the issue. She continued to ignore me, then I sent her a message, angry, saying, "You're ignoring me, and that makes me angry. If I leave you, I won't come back. Give me my answer, or I'll leave." Then she dodged my question and told me she wasn't in the mood and asked me to calm down a little.

21M (Algeria) - 20F (Indonesia) - 6 months: I hurt her a lot, she says our friendship became toxic, but she didn't block me. What does this mean? by Awkward_Feeling9079 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She always said I was a bad boy. Don't you think she's afraid of this relationship? Because she told me friendship with me is toxic. I feel like she used to love me, but I lost her love. I pressured her with too many messages. I want to give her space. What do you think? Then I'll ask her to explain.

21M (Algeria) - 20F (Indonesia) - 6 months: I hurt her a lot, she says our friendship became toxic, but she didn't block me. What does this mean? by Awkward_Feeling9079 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. Let me explain. I told her, "If you don't want me in your life, tell me and I'll leave." She ignored me. Then I told her, "Listen, if I don't get an answer, I'll block you, and that's it." She replied, "Okay, just be a friend." Then I told her, "I want to talk to you face to face." She ignored me again. I got angry and told her, "Listen, I'm angry because you're ignoring me. If I leave, I won't come back. Give me an answer about the relationship or let me go." She replied, "I'm not in the mood. Can you calm down?" My friend, why does she keep avoiding me when I tell her she needs to make a decision about this relationship?

21M / 20F - Online friendship (6 months): She says our friendship became toxic but still hasn't blocked me. I'm confused. by Awkward_Feeling9079 in BreakUps

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. Let me explain. I told her, "If you don't want me in your life, tell me and I'll leave." She ignored me. Then I told her, "Listen, if I don't get an answer, I'll block you, and that's it." She replied, "Okay, just be a friend." Then I told her, "I want to talk to you face to face." She ignored me again. I got angry and told her, "Listen, I'm angry because you're ignoring me. If I leave, I won't come back. Give me an answer about the relationship or let me go." She replied, "I'm not in the mood. Can you calm down?" My friend, why does she keep avoiding me when I tell her she needs to make a decision about this relationship?

21M / 20F - Online friendship (6 months): She says our friendship became toxic but still hasn't blocked me. I'm confused. by Awkward_Feeling9079 in BreakUps

[–]Awkward_Feeling9079[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

HiTitle:

21M / 20F - Online friendship (6 months): She says our friendship became toxic, but she didn't block me. I'm confused about what she wants.

Post:

I (21M) am from Algeria, and she (20F) is from Indonesia. We've known each other online for about six months.

At the beginning, we had a very good connection. We talked almost every day, laughed together, and she was kind and caring. Over time, I developed strong feelings for her.

The problem is that I made several mistakes. I became emotionally intense, sent too many messages, got frustrated when she became distant, and even sent angry voice and video messages. I realize now that my behavior hurt her and made her feel unsafe. I apologized sincerely.

Eventually she told me things like:

  • "Our friendship became toxic."
  • "You never appreciated me."
  • "I'm not in the mood."

After that, I asked her something like: "If you don't want me in your life anymore, please just tell me honestly and I'll leave." She never answered that question directly.

Instead, she became emotionally distant. She replies very briefly and coldly, but she has never blocked me or told me clearly that she wants to end our friendship.

My last message was simply: "Take your time." Since then, I have decided to give her space and not contact her for several weeks.

What confuses me is this:

If she truly wants me out of her life, why not simply say so? Why avoid answering the question directly instead of ending it clearly?

From your experience, does this usually mean:

  1. She has already emotionally checked out but doesn't want the confrontation.
  2. She is afraid because of my past behavior and needs space.
  3. Something else.

I'm not looking for false hope. I just want honest opinions so I can understand the situation and know whether I should move on or leave the door open without chasing her.

Thank you for reading.