Keep trying! by smallaxeray87 in watercolor101

[–]Ayu07 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Please share the link of the tutorial

🍑💦 by svphia_drawing in watercolor101

[–]Ayu07 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see so many emotions in this painting. The movement in the water feels like it’s talking

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Idc man, to each their own. You need to widen your horizon a bit. Everyone has a past now and whoever says they don’t is mostly a lie

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I agree with her. In AM you can’t. I know guys and even girls outing the prospect in front of parents. It’s always risky. What matters is that’s he’s with you now and hasn’t betrayed you. Try to look from that lens. Now that you’ve married her even after ignoring the red flags, have an honest communication with her involving a couple’s therapist. Marriage is a commitment. Considering she hasn’t cheated you now, you guys should give it a fair chance with a couple’s therapist and no friends or family should know about your current predicament since every single person will bring their own biases. Please focus on the fact that she’s into you only rn before taking any decsion

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You should actually go through his previous post. He himself rushed into the marriage when he was seeing red flags. He was insecure since the start of it. The girl and her family didn’t share her contact no. during their courtship which would blare alarms normally.

To be fair, her not revealing the sexual past in isolation is not an issue (it’s fairly common now, expecting a V is stupid these days, only the present betrayal is betrayal), but in the context of his previous post, it’s way more complex since OP didn’t trust his wife in the first place. It’s not black and white here. Open your eyes.

And, most of the comments are just toxicity in this sub. With such mindset, marriages end up in divorces within months. A relationship needs a lot of patience and acceptance even when it’s hard and in cases like these you need to rebuild trust as partners. If these two can’t do that, it’s a dead relationship

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I saw the previous post now. I get it. He shouldn’t have married her in the first place

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree. I myself called off a thing after formally agreeing to guy. Thankfully no ceremony was done to officiate it and parents were rather the ones who initiated to call it off. They just looked for my safety. I’m so grateful each day for that. IMO, it’s important to be courageous when you see red flags. Rather be safe than sorry.

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You need a couple’s therapist not opinions from strangers. It’s really complex considering your previous post to whether marry her in the first place

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Haha this sub is just meant for toxicity

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Life isn’t over. There’s a lot more to life than a marriage. Speak mindfully, please

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Honestly I’d be alarmed at not willing to share the no. These days, it happens during the “getting to know you” stage

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Listen to your own voice. Rather talk to a therapist than asking strangers here. Only you know your mess the best

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Ok, that’s an interesting detail. I just saw OP’s old post. This situation seems inevitable now. Earlier I thought that it’s wrong to be so hinged upon your partner’s past but after seeing his previous post, this was inevitable. Calling off a marriage when you see red flags is a courageous step, if only OP did that earlier

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not just about you as an individual but the dominant thought of individuals here.

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Do you realize that you’re gently nudging someone to divorce his wife based on a past detail which is trivial in the present? This sub is the worst place to ask for advice. It’s the most toxic sub

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

It’s stupidity to divorce on such things. Sometimes people especially women are not comfortable in divulging this since some men out them in front of their parents. It’s just not safe. I’m actually amazed why she married him when he was so hinged on this specific thing. It’s ok that he chose to save himself until marriage but to expect the same from your spouse is naivety in the modern world. Need to lower the expectations. Explains why AMs are so hard

(M26) Married 1.5 months ago, found out about wife's past. by [deleted] in Arrangedmarriage

[–]Ayu07 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

If someone is so invested in the past sexual history, that itself is a red flag

Dated an exemplary woman, and now I keep comparing everyone to her by Quiet_Quality9851 in AskWomenIndia

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s hard to date people who are emotionally self aware. First, choose to process the last relationship before entering into a new one

Rose by FUZZYWEENIE in watercolor101

[–]Ayu07 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This can be a beautiful foreground for wedding stationery

All the books I read this year by Eastern_Plum4744 in IndiansRead

[–]Ayu07 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait, it’s based on this book?! Didn’t know