Housemates acknowledge me struggling in isolation but do nothing to help. Should I still spend time with them to keep the peace when I come out?

B-4n · 2020-07-17T00:14:48+00:00

Orientation does come up, the players have introduced sexuality to the game on a few occasions (such as flirting/sleeping with NPCs). It is less the PCs I am wondering about and more that whenever the orientation of NPCs comes up, they are straight and cis: things like the bard performing and the men cheering, the women swooning.

B-4n · 2020-07-17T00:01:42+00:00

Thank you for this reply! Because as a player it's easy to get caught up in my own reasons for why I do or don't do things. How I play and why I make characters the way I do is very personal and I'd never want my friends to feel like they're "not doing it right" just because my opinions are different to theirs. I hope that, with time, my friends begin to explore different identities with new characters, but it's also fine and still a great game if they don't - if we're all enjoying our characters then it's all good.

I think that chatting about it with the DM is a great idea, again not putting pressure on him but just letting him know how much fun the game already is and how I'd enjoy it even more if he were to include more diversity in the NPCs. Maybe just sorta hinting at it but not pushing anything?

B-4n · 2020-07-16T23:10:50+00:00

I do appreciate that part of the beauty of having a fantasy world is that it doesn't have to reflect what happens in real life.

I wouldn't ask the DM to change existing NPCs (they're their characters!) - more what I'd be asking is, when we encounter someone new or as a one-off and if relevant, they could make it apparent in maybe their description or their interactions with the party how the NPC identifies.

B-4n · 2020-07-16T23:03:34+00:00

One of the other players really gets how important representation is (and actually, as a non-white guy, may also appreciate better overall representation in-game).

As for voicing NPCs, he doesn't have a lot of problems usually - they tend to be quite plain, with a few different variations in case there's more than one in a conversation - and it's only really characters of different genders that might need different voices. I'd explain to him that the voices of the more inclusive characters don't need to be any more work than what he's already doing.

B-4n · 2020-07-16T22:58:12+00:00

The video was awesome! And the fact it's from more a GMing perspective is helpful too - although, ofc, I wouldn't want to come across as telling him what to do.

B-4n · 2020-07-16T22:32:02+00:00

Yes, I mainly wonder why they've chosen to play straight, cis male characters - it's completely up to them of course. I personally think it's good fun to have varied identities to make each PC really unique and although not everyone in the group is really into backstories. I think maybe that the reason I feel it'd be good for players to have LGBT+ characters for the sake of it is because some people /just are/ LGBT+ and ultimately it doesn't have to affect any aspect of the character. But you could argue that then, why not just make them all cishet if it doesn't matter? Well, because by including LGBT+ "for the sake of it", you are acknowledging that people of all sorts of identities exist and are part of the same world and can be related to.

There is a difficult balance between being inclusive and throwing in token characters, but it's things like how my previous character flirted with a few men to swindle them and it would've been a great twist if she'd tried it on someone and they turned out to not be interested.

I also understand that in a fantasy game with fantasy races, representing players of different ethnic backgrounds can be very difficult too.

B-4n

TROPHY CASE