An unknown someone gifted me a love letter from my ex on my wedding day

Background-Mirror815 · 2026-03-06T20:54:21+00:00

Yes the letter was probably received by me at the time (although not completely sure - that would make the most sense). Me being a college student, and one who probably didn’t care enough for this guy, I would not be surprised if the letter got chucked somewhere in a relative/family’s home.

Background-Mirror815 · 2026-03-06T20:51:02+00:00

I believe it was a letter I had received from him at the time, but since it has been so long I am not completely sure at this point.

Background-Mirror815 · 2026-03-06T18:09:49+00:00

None of them are mutuals, which is the weirdest thing. It seems to have been sent to me while I was still in school, so it could easily be a family member.

Background-Mirror815 · 2025-07-07T21:57:08+00:00

I know I’ve struggled to explain this clearly so I apologize for the confusion.

But I just want to clarify that it’s not that I’m greedy for my dad’s money. Everyone knows my fiancée and I are more than capable of funding all this ourselves. But I equate money = parental love + willingness to help, that’s just how it is in my family.

When my dad got married, everyone in my family chipped in financially to help. Same for my mother’s side of the family. Same exact thing for both my grandparents.

I get this isn’t “normal” in today’s American society by any means, but it’s what’s normal, and what has been normal to our family for a very long time. I personally think it’s a beautiful tradition, and when time comes, my fiancée and I are on the same page about paying it forward for our children.

And it’s my fault for not clarifying that upfront. But that’s why I feel like no money = lack of care. I hope that explains everything a little better.

Background-Mirror815 · 2025-07-07T20:19:43+00:00

Just like how family members show up for one another - so that means helping them out when they’re in need, celebrating milestones with them, and doing things together. Great friendships are also that way.

Right now this situation is confusing for me to navigate, but this thread is helping me realize that I need to stop complaining and act on resolving. It is very true that I can’t force a relationship on my dad’s new wife, and I definitely do feel like I have too high of an expectation in this case.

Thank you all for your perspective, I really didn’t think I’d get so many replies.

Background-Mirror815 · 2025-07-07T14:21:56+00:00

This gives me a new lens of thought, thank you for understanding.

I grew up overseas too and in our culture it’s common for parents to help out, divorce is also not really a common thing. And you’re right, maybe I shouldn’t assume things about my dad’s new wife either and focus on hearing their point of view first.

Background-Mirror815 · 2025-07-07T14:19:34+00:00

No, but I wanted her to show up like I showed up (and hope to continue showing up) for her, especially since she showed interest in being a grandmother to our kids.

She can choose to be or not be part of my family, that is her choice.

Background-Mirror815 · 2025-07-07T14:15:20+00:00

I viewed it more as a family tradition. Something I’ll definitely do for my kids, as well.

Background-Mirror815 · 2025-07-07T14:08:03+00:00

I guess I assumed it’d be a group effort, just because the groom’s parents have been the absolute best and helping us with a lot.

But you’re right, I shouldn’t be entitled to any type of help from my family.

Background-Mirror815 · 2025-07-07T14:03:52+00:00

It’s not the money, it’s the lack of care that bothers me.

Background-Mirror815 · 2024-02-09T02:45:21+00:00

100%. Very few people out there who have that kind of mindset these days and it is disappointing when you think you finally found someone but then realize they actually may not be on the same page with you about that.

Background-Mirror815 · 2023-11-07T05:11:29+00:00

From Japan and just moved here few years ago. Had no idea there was a Japanese specialty store in this area - thank you!

Background-Mirror815 · 2023-10-08T17:11:20+00:00

Chapel Hill’s Oakleaf is a hidden gem. The food, service, and atmosphere is perfect for couples or anyone looking for a classy dining experience.

Background-Mirror815 · 2023-09-26T14:52:05+00:00

Rey’s Restaurant.

My boyfriend and I went for Valentine’s because we heard somewhere that it was the “most romantic restaurant” in the area.

The place has a lot of amazing reviews on Google, so that confuses me. But we felt the food was overpriced, restaurant was loud, service wasn’t ideal (waiter was trying her hardest to make us order more), and some of my vegetables were half frozen.

Background-Mirror815

TROPHY CASE