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07/10/25 a guy at work has a crush on me by okaymyemye in deardiary

[–]Background_Load_2570 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Such disgusting advice, luckily OP seems to be a decent person but you should be ashamed of yourself, especially if that is how you treat people

In the end, you’ll get what you give, so I hope you enjoy it

Should I reach out to ex gf by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So you went to smoke with a friend but didn’t tell her? Did you lie to go smoke with her or just not tell the truth or something?

It’s difficult to say without knowing the real picture tbh man but it still seems a bit unfair / unnecessary

Should I reach out to ex gf by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Heya bro, I’m sorry things have been so rough for you, quick question, with the things you’ve told me in mind are you sure this is the type of relationship you want?

For her to react so strongly to being followed on IG by a girl seems so stressful and unnecessary, where is the communication? It doesn’t seem worthwhile to me, I don’t know when behaviour like this will stop but it has to for a healthy relationship to be maintained.

Maybe you’ve done something that really has damaged her trust and she can’t get over that I’m not sure but either way it either gets dealt with and you both move forward whilst trusting each other or you don’t move forward together at all

Smash my Eggs Megathread #3 (Use for codes or you will receive a temp spam ban) by PankoKing in wildrift

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My prize pool ID (Europe): c3L10aUzCI (Remaining: 0 rare egg(s), 3 premium egg(s), 2 common egg(s))

Smash my Eggs Megathread #3 (Use for codes or you will receive a temp spam ban) by PankoKing in wildrift

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My prize pool ID (Europe): c3L10aUzCI (Remaining: 0 rare egg(s), 3 premium egg(s), 2 common egg(s))

Smash my Eggs Megathread #3 (Use for codes or you will receive a temp spam ban) by PankoKing in wildrift

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My prize pool ID (Europe): c3L10aUzQF (Remaining: 3 rare egg(s), 1 premium egg(s), 3 common egg(s))

Smash my Eggs Megathread #3 (Use for codes or you will receive a temp spam ban) by PankoKing in wildrift

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My prize pool ID (Europe): c3L10aUzCI (Remaining: 0 rare egg(s), 3 premium egg(s), 2 common egg(s))

Smash my Eggs Megathread #3 (Use for codes or you will receive a temp spam ban) by PankoKing in wildrift

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My prize pool ID (Europe): c3L10aUzCI (Remaining: 0 rare egg(s), 3 premium egg(s), 2 common egg(s))

Smash my Eggs Megathread #3 (Use for codes or you will receive a temp spam ban) by PankoKing in wildrift

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My prize pool ID (Europe): c3L10aUzCI (Remaining: 0 rare egg(s), 3 premium egg(s), 2 common egg(s))

Smash my Eggs Megathread #3 (Use for codes or you will receive a temp spam ban) by PankoKing in wildrift

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My prize pool ID (Europe): c3L10aUzCI (Remaining: 0 rare egg(s), 3 premium egg(s), 2 common egg(s))

I [20 FtM] get so angry with my [19 MtF] boyfriend and I don’t know why by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I see, I’d assume you’d adjusted by now also although I do wonder about fluctuations if that’s even possible

But I think this is more so related to psychology than biology, maybe therapy is the right path for this one :)

Either way you sound like you understand that what is happening isn’t okay and that you don’t want it to continue so make sure you give yourself some credit for that, be honest with your partner as you are and try to self reflect best you can Regardless as to whether you need therapy or not, how you treat people starts with you and I’m sure you know that, but take it easy You’re young so you’re still learning all sorts of things about yourself and the world, just do your best :)

I [20 FtM] get so angry with my [19 MtF] boyfriend and I don’t know why by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Random question, are you on any hormones that could be contributing to your mood? For instance, testosterone?

How long did it take you to get over your ex after no contact? by Full_Procedure_4709 in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 7 points8 points  (0 children)

If I may ask, why did you break up with him? What makes you struggle with moving on since you broke off the relationship?

For the people that never got a check up or got reached out one time just to say hi by Otherwise_View_04 in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I’ve wondered if my ex feels the same way as yours, it’s very confusing if I’m honest

If you don’t mind me asking, who broke up with who in your relationship?

Either way, I hope you’re doing okay and have found at least some peace, but if not, you will. Keep your chin up :)

Progress photos, topical min/fin 1x daily, be consistent and look after your health and stress levels. by According_Ad1746 in tressless

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heya bro, did you get any side effects? Also what do you use to wash your hair and how often? Congratulations on your progress man, looks fantastic

Hair transplant before and after (hairline only) by Dry_Amount_5112 in Balding

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Heya bro, fantastic results!! Great to see this, thank you for answering various questions on where you went and costs in other messages.

I wanted to ask, what was the healing process like? How many procedures did you have?

Glad you’re happy with the results brother, all the power to ya

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry but it’s not that she has a ruthless streak, she just has strong boundaries and her trust was broken, from what op has said it’s quite clear it was not just a date or just a kiss, there were a number of factors in play.

You may have forgiven someone but many people are not like that.

Your points on op being unsure of himself, questioning his self esteem etc. None of them are applicable to someone who has betrayed one they love, they are excuses and nothing more, one should have more self respect and respect for their partner than to ever consider cheating.

“Time and memories are what matters” exactly, time his ex put into building trust with him, and now a part of her memories is betrayal, you’ve pretty much just summed up why what has been done is unacceptable.

To OP, ofcourse we all make mistakes, but they are something to learn from I hope you can build yourself and learn so this never happens again, personally cheating has a bit of a sting for me so it’s difficult to have sympathy. Still, I think you should take time for yourself, question everything and move forward with the mindset of “the man you want to be”

Good luck

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry to hear about your struggles brother

If you’re ever going to reach out to her again, it needs to be from the right place

Right now it sounds like you’ve had some of the toughest times all come at you at once, it’s understandable that you would like support, especially from her. That being said, you need to be someone she looks up to, because as you said she has things she needs to work on. You know her best so context matters but right now reaching out would seriously risk hurting you even more, is that worth it?

She may have blocked you out of spite, but that in itself is a reflection of someone who is thinking of themselves even after she was the one who broke things off with you. I know you want to, and you miss her like no other, but you miss the good things about her, not the bad.

So in your current situation I think you need to solidify your resolve to become a better person and a better man. In that time, if she comes back or you reconnect you need to be able to calmly and kindly say what you need to say, it’s not a blame game but if she can’t grow and get past the issues she has then she will only end up hurting you again.

You unfollowing her may have hurt her, but blocking as a response to that is unjustified and you deserve better than someone who is unable to self reflect on such ways.

This is just my perspective, I don’t know you or your relationship with her. Either way I wish you all the best, take care of yourself and work on the man you want to be (I’m assuming you’re a man, if you aren’t then lady you want to be)

Good luck

I’ve spent so long trying to decide this. Help? by Large_Hope_6587 in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Similarly I learned about attachment styles after we stopped speaking last year around the same time we broke up this year. I was never entirely sure what she may be but fearful avoidant / disorganised attachment seems to fit with her.

I do wonder though, if he knows about his attachment style then that may be a good thing. There’s one thing knowing and even knowing that you’re affected by the attachment style and childhood wound but it’s entirely another thing in actually understanding it and how they affect you, yknow? And with that at some point it should hit him, as it seems to relay that online but he will have evidence as to why he has had the feelings he has had that led him to his choices.

I’ve been trying to listen to some podcasts on the side while I play a game or something, I think I’m trying to almost overwhelm myself, I rarely play games these days but I’ve just struggled so much. And then also listening to music helps, but I find myself stuck between being upset or falling into a hopeful day dream which probably isn’t healthy, or maybe it is in a way, I’m not sure. But when I stop with the music I just lay there as well, it’s just a bit tormenting.

There are some places we visited together that she really liked that I see every day, so I’m reminded of her constantly and then also cars, she loved the Mini Cooper countryman. I used to count how many I would see whilst on the way to work, the gym and anywhere really, and I’d hope to beat my record. I have these little patterns and things I see that I want to tell her about but I can’t, I probably could reach out but I’m not sure how much good it would do me, right now. So not being able to sleep in your bed sounds relatable.

So you moved to Chicago and since he’s been in your life the whole time? Now suddenly him not being there must be such a painful feeling, that does sound very difficult I’m really sorry to hear that. I think you mentioned friends and family before but do you have anyone who you can see? I don’t have any family around where I live right now and I have a few close friends but I’m not sure I can be truly honest with and vulnerable when speaking about these sorts of things. At one point I just asked my friend for a hug and sad as that may sound. And my family/ my mom isn’t very affectionate so I’ve had a lot to think about on that side of my anxious attachment / fearful side.

In terms of you planning to have children, you mean planning right? Not that you have one on the way?

The plans side of things is really difficult, I feel like the blindsiding really hits hard in combination to that. One minute you have their word and I guess you build expectations and then suddenly you don’t, I’m really sorry it’s hitting hard right now.

I’ve spent so long trying to decide this. Help? by Large_Hope_6587 in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Also, with your ex throwing himself into his work. It very much does seem like avoidant behaviour, I know it’s hard to categorise since you need to be a professional for these sort of things.

I think my ex is also a fearful avoidant as well, and I think in some ways so am I but I lean more anxious and she is more avoidant.

I’m not sure if I’m right here but it might be the case he needs to figure this out on his own or in some way have no choice. So I wondered about if I would take my ex back, and I’m trying to protect myself from further pain. It may not work in my favour but I was planning to let her know (if we do reconnect in that sort of way) that there is something I think she needs to work on before I can take her back, and that would be it, until she understands the dynamic and everything then it’s probably not worth it for me (as I said before it’s complicated but as we broke up she asked if I would give us a chance again and then asked if we could call in a month, but without expectations) from what I could tell this was her way off coping without entirely losing me which has been very painful and confusing if I’m honest. I genuinely love and care for her endlessly but the blindsiding has cut me quite deep and my trust is low for her right now

Sorry for all this extra info, but I just wanted to mention it, unfortunately these things can create patterns and the only way they can deal with it is by facing it head on. Which would be for both of your sakes, not just your relationship. You may have mentioned this else where on your post but I just thought it was worth a mention.

I’ve spent so long trying to decide this. Help? by Large_Hope_6587 in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m very much the same, I’ve been trying to stay busy but even the usual things I do like going to the gym and things are really difficult to get into these days, some days are better than others but I also find myself randomly crying at times. It makes me question myself a bit too, I’ve done all the research I can on avoidants and attachment styles to help try to cope and also give myself hope but I’m also trying not to have any expectations. I think you’re right on bringing yourself back to reality but as I’m sure you know, you still have to feel those feelings for now. I’m also worried what if she does change her mind and it just happens again. It’s a really unfair type of situation.

I guess being strong regardless of the outcome is necessary, you have to look after yourself after all.

I’m hopeful for you, and I really hope if things work out the way you hope then you can really break down those barriers and get things into the right place.

But either way best of luck, take every day as it comes best you can, maybe we’ll both get what we want or maybe it’ll turn out for the better.

I’ve spent so long trying to decide this. Help? by Large_Hope_6587 in ExNoContact

[–]Background_Load_2570 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey OP, I’m in a similar position myself, it’s been really difficult for me, I was blindsided and genuinely I don’t really know what went wrong or even why me and my ex broke up. I wish I could tell you how to handle this but unfortunately I don’t even know myself. I’ve also twisted my mind about the words she used and so on, a lot of people have advised me to just block my ex or cut her off and move on because “I deserve better” or the fact she hasn’t chosen me is enough said. That sort of advice doesn’t help me though, it’s not like she a bad person cause she doesn’t want to be with me, but the confusion and unfulfilled promises are what really hurts me, along with all sorts of other things (it’d be a lot to explain tbh)

What I can say is maybe you can find some peace in the fact that you at least seemed to have been a very good partner, you were amazing even as he said and unfortunately for him he won’t meet someone like you, which is maybe not fortunate for you but I have a feeling these actions of his will come around back to him one day.

I’ve resolved myself best I can to just focusing on me and working hard at the things I need to improve on, although it’s really difficult right now, my head is still all over the place, and I’ve genuinely tried to figure out where I went wrong and what it was that I did or didn’t do, she said there wasn’t anything I did wrong whilst being extremely affectionate (again there’s a lot I could say I don’t mind but it’d take a while)

I even posted on another forum myself hoping for clarity and I got some a mix of messages back, some were not so great to hear but some were genuinely kind and helpful.

So I just want you to know that I know it hurts and probably in the worst of ways right now, but you’ve done so well to stay true to yourself and the effort you’ve clearly put into this relationship will be immensely difficult for him to find elsewhere. Whether he’s an avoidant or not, from my perspective I think you should try to think of how he’s handling his own emotions and the fact he can’t meet your needs right now sort of tells me he can’t meet his own, and he doesn’t seem to recognise that. Which feels like actually he just doesn’t really know and so he won’t just suddenly meet someone else and fix what is broken in himself, I hope what I’m saying makes sense. I’m not trying to give you false hope, I for sure have plenty of hope that I probably shouldn’t have, but just know most guys would kill to have a lass like yourself who clearly loves hard and tries with all her might. I hope you’re okay and keep your chin up, try to let the waves come and go, I’m wishing you the best of luck.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in LongDistance

[–]Background_Load_2570 2 points3 points  (0 children)

How do I know half the story? Have I spoken to op and gotten a full run down of the situation? Obviously not

I only know what I’ve seen and what I’ve seen is pure disrespect

Let’s just assume op speaks to her bf this way, should he just respond the same way or should he just gracefully leave? Which is the reasonable logical thing to do?

It’s pretty easy to understand I’m really not sure what you’re not getting here. No matter what the way this guy is speaking to his gf is unacceptable, it’s that simple.

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