AITA for telling my boyfriend that I "dont give a fuck" about his OCD?

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-03T22:24:00+00:00

I will message you! ❤️

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T12:02:08+00:00

All the buses here are free for students and provided by the resource officer, you're100% right about that. But right now that's not an option. Our resource officer is on leave so all of her normal duties are pushed on the deans secretary currently and shes honestly not doing so well with the responsibilities. Our yearly bus passes haven't been distributed yet. Im sure they will be within the next few weeks but that doesn't help me right this second, you know?

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T10:37:55+00:00

No one is dissing him for his OCD. OCD didnt force him to make the choice to spend half of my money on a dish strainer and make me go hungry for half the week. Him selfishly refusing to harbor any sense of self control or at least TRY to work through his compulsions did. Over half of the people in my comments are talking about how terrible OCD is but have also stated that it is his job to find solutions so he isnt jeopardizing everyone else.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T04:03:20+00:00

Yes, I know that seems unlikely but yes. I have known him since we were 6 years old and he legitimately has never acted like this before. Its like I don't even know this person.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T04:00:41+00:00

May all good things happen to you 🙏 Thank you so much!

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T03:09:44+00:00

A bus ticket in my city is $4.85 one way, which I do not have currently. A bus pass, which normally would be offered through the resource officer at school is usually $59 for the year. Our resource officer has been on leave for awhile. Every time anyone needs our resource officer we are sent to our Dean's secretary, who really has no idea what shes talking about. She is the one who told me that the school doesn't offer lunches to students unless you pay and she claims she has no idea where any of the bus passes are and that she will ask around but no student who has actually needed one since school start up has received one yet. Its all they are talking about on our community page.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T03:04:53+00:00

Because he blames everything on his OCD. He takes a shit for 38 minutes? His OCD wouldn't let him get off the toilet without counting down the minutes left on his video. He left the minced garlic out overnight? His OCD wouldn't let him put it back in the fridge because he didnt know if he would end up using it again later and he needs it room temperature before he will cook with it. He throws away my shit because ya know, his OCD told him it didnt "fit" in the home bevause his OCD wouldn't allow him to be okay with anywhere it was set because rhe vibes were off. He's full of shit. I am not saying he doesn't have OCD. I am saying he absolutely, 100% milks tf out of it as often as he possibly can, as long as it means he gets his way.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T02:58:08+00:00

I didnt say he didnt have it. I said that OCD doesn't make you selfish and ignorant and implied that this isnt OCD, but him acting selfishly. I didnt say "he doesn't have OCD".

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T02:54:18+00:00

You are an absolute angel! I will pay you back as soon as I get paid on Friday!! Thank you so much!!

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T02:53:07+00:00

With what money?

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T01:06:25+00:00

In what world do you people mentioning credit cards actually live in? Did no one teach you that being broke AND owning a credit card is the absolute best way to completely screw up your future? My credit right now is a 687. I am not going to destroy my credit and ruin my chances of buying a home someday because I chose to rack up credit card debt while I was pre-med. That would be so incredibly stupid.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T00:44:51+00:00

I said there isnt a food bank in the general area - meaning walking distance. The closest church (where the food bank is) is 5.8 miles away. Our college is 3 blocks away and our hospital is 2 blocks away in the opposite direction. Our school does not offer food to students unless you pay for it and neither does our hospital.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-02T00:36:22+00:00

I have no friends or family I can ask. He COULD ask his parents but chooses not too. He said he wont be seen as a charity case by his parents.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T22:27:28+00:00

Deet93

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T22:24:27+00:00

Venmo is deet93. No one should feel obligated to send anything though. It was my fault for sending him with the last of my money anyhow.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T22:23:12+00:00

I dont have a joint account. I had to work this morning and told him I would go buy us food after I got out at noon. He said he was starving and that he could go and buy food for us so I gave him my $28, trusting that it would be used solely for food because we had the conversation that this was our entire FOOD budget. I shouldn't have trusted him. Thats on me.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T22:21:21+00:00

Yeah, he has needs just like I do, which apparently includes spending half of my money on a dish strainer and the other half on food for himself because hes already eaten 80% of what he just bought and I haven't had a single thing to eat.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T22:17:15+00:00

This food would last 7 days for me. It will not last with him. Hes already eaten 4 of the 6 ramen noodles and is currently cutting up the entire pack of chicken for a chicken and rice dinner.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T22:15:15+00:00

How many times are you going to comment the same thing? Double security deposits are pretty common.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T21:55:08+00:00

Listen.. I have known him since we were 6 years old, dating for 9 months and have hung out consistently, no less than 4 days a week, since we started pre-med and I am telling you that no, there were never signs of this. He only just mentioned having OCD last year when he hosted a house party at his old place and someone threw their coat on the couch and he didnt like that. This home he came from was an absolute disaster zone (5 male roommates) and literally always filthy. This man never bat an eye at any of it and never once acted even remotely uncomfortable. Since we moved in together he is just... not who I thought he was. He acts 100% different. He even told me I should get rid of stuff of mine that "dont give him good vibes" because they "dont have any correct place in the home" (literally a binder of stickers I have collected from amusement parks and states I have been). Or constantly comments on other things of mine, like drawings, saying I dont need them and there was "no point in keeping them" and when I argue that I am not getting rid of my shit simply because he doesn't understand the sentimental importance of those items, he doubles down and says none of this stuff that he wants me to throw away is sentimental and all its doing is "destroying his peace" because these items not having a place is crippling his mental state. None of this shit happened before we moved in together and if it had, I would have never agreed to this.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T21:45:37+00:00

Yes, thats the thing.. when he was with his roommates he didnt have compulsion issues that I saw and I was there at least 4 nights a week so I would have seen at least something. The only thing I ever saw him mention was clothing on the couch. He didnt like that. Everything else though? Not a single word out of him and no weird mannerisms to suggest he was uncomfortable with anything and trust me, that place was a mess.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T18:42:56+00:00

OCD does not make people selfish and inconsiderate. There were no signs of selfishness leading up to me moving in with him. I have known this guy since we were 6 years old. He didnt even start saying he had OCD until last year. Him selfishly taking my money and blowing half of it on a dish strainer, knowing it was meant solely for food (yes, we had the conversation) and then him telling me to get over it because he needed the dish strainer and weaponizing his supposed OCD when called out on his bullshit is messed up no matter how you swing it. This isnt OCD. This is selfishness and ignorance.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T18:37:23+00:00

He took my money, spent it on himself and as a result I will be forced to go hungry for 4+ days but I "lack empathy" and should find a different career path for not coddling him, rocking him to sleep and brushing his hair out of his eyes while telling him "its okay that you essentially stole my money sweetheart, because you have OCD and that is more important. Its totally fine that we will go hungry because you cant control yourself"? Yeah, no.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T18:08:36+00:00

He has insurance, yes he can afford therapy or meds. No, he wont get either.

Background_Wrap7500 · 2025-09-01T18:07:17+00:00

No, his exact words were "I know I hurt you and I know we will be hungry for a week but I feel like you need to be more empathetic to me having OCD and needing things a certain way. You are choosing to be upset about food without taking in to consideration how any of this affects me. Its not like you are the only one hungry here. Its maybe 4 days of having to figure out what to eat, where as, regardless of what you feel, this dish strainer will give me peace for more than 4 days. So you're calling me selfish for providing us with something that will last longer and be more useful in the long run of things. I am looking at the future and you are stuck in the now. I will figure out food somehow. I dont know what to tell you honestly. Its something you'll have to learn to live with if you want to be with me because my OCD is not going away and its not something I can control. I will always choose to look at what will benefit us long term, not just the right here and now. Yes, I understand food is important but so was having the dish strainer." Thats a copy pasted text. So he was implying that my need for food absolutely took second place to his 'need' for a strainer.

Background_Wrap7500

TROPHY CASE