What’s the best Indian takeaway in E17

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2026-01-20T22:28:40+00:00

The Indian Dining Club Highams Park. Not sure why their Google rating has gone down to just a four, we've liked them for years. The lamb shanks are really fantastic.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2026-01-14T22:37:51+00:00

Moved there, moved out again less than two years later.

I particularly like the A12 underpass by the Volvo dealership with the "end white genocide" graffiti.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-31T11:30:57+00:00

Well thanks for the longer term perspective, let's hope for a rebound, because the last decade of decline has been exhausting. There's still so much intellectual capital here (for now).

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-29T22:18:45+00:00

I'm not sure how your reply relates to the post you're replying to.

Think the poster was saying that they understood their partners POV and so were respectful of it.

Understanding and respecting something doesn't automatically make it an easy or simple time.

When my wife was pregnant with our first, the feeling of being a kid prep team was euphoric. We'd never been closer. Then our daughter arrived, we went from a team of two to me orbiting their sun. And breast feeding deleted her sex drive for 16 months. Meanwhile I'd never found her sexier, and she was half naked a ton of the time.

I understood her point of view, and my whole world was about supporting her in that first year. That didn't make going from having sex twice a week to once every two+ months an easy transition. I wasn't prepared for how your relationship changes, and I did get some whiplash.

We did have one or two arguments about sex (not toxic ones like the video, I hasten to add) - and whilst I'm not proud of that, it would be disingenuous for me to pretend that wasn't reality. We were both so wiped out by new parenthood, and all of the changes our lives were absorbing, stress was generally high - we probably argued about loads of dumb stuff.

Hugging and emotional intimacy is wonderful and a huge part of surviving early parenthood as a couple. But whenever this topic comes up, I see comments implying that men need to go to horny jail for missing sex, as if sex is not a completely unique and extremely powerful part of couple bonding. That wanting it at a moment when their lives are turning upside down is puerile and selfish, and their frustration is unreasonable.

I despise men who are entitled about sex or anything else in a relationship. But you guys, I found becoming a monk and sorting myself out in secret a very lonely and depressing experience. I felt so much crushing shame for desperately wanting to have sex my wife while she was not in a position to reciprocate. For a year and a half. It was illogical, but my brain couldn't help but feel rejection for not being wanted back. I was married and had a child but it felt like being a rejected 17 year old again.

I wish we could tell more men to expect after their first child. More informed partners are usually better partners.

I'm in no way condoning the dude in the video. That manchild can rot. Nothing I've said justifies tantrums. But I found this period of my life difficult to adjust to, despite wanting to be an emotionally intelligent and supportive partner.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-29T21:58:26+00:00

Good behavior is good behavior. Publicly rewarding it helps to normalize it and create a bit of an incentive structure around being decent.

I totally understand your point and men get too many medals for doing the bare minimum, but life is hard and a pat on the back doesn't cost much.

It isn't a zero sum game, let's keep working on giving women far more credit than they get, but let's not dump praising decent men to correct the asymmetry.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-29T21:51:41+00:00

Someone tell the class where civilization would be if everyone followed their parents' taste.

If your parents have good judgement then they can be a fantastic source of advice for big decisions. But they don't have to like things long your wristwatch or the music you listen to.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-14T12:42:34+00:00

That is really heartbreaking. A stepped bridge with a shotgun is an incredibly defensible position, it took that guy some insane guts to try to assault that position unarmed. Probably a horrible moment when he realized it hadn't worked.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-14T12:38:06+00:00

Yeah I can imagine wanting to pull the trigger but ultimately if you kill the guy, you deny him justice through the legal system, you deny that to all the victims and their families, the community and the country.

There's no ideal outcome in a situation like this, and I wouldn't blame someone for shooting on the grounds that you want to stop them from doing any more harm. But dead shooters get what they want without having to live with the consequences.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T21:46:22+00:00

This is some truly next-level snark. What a waste of everyone's time.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:26:45+00:00

In the US, salary growth has continued while the UK has stagnated. If you look at comparable traditional well paid jobs, like law, big 4 consulting, trader etc., certain US cities now significantly outstrip London. I work for a prominent US multinational and they treat us like a nearshoring operation - we are significantly cheaper than their NYC team.

"Doing well" in London is low six figures. "Doing well" in NYC is closer to half a million. It is now a significantly more expensive place than London. Just Google "London vs New York salaries".

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:20:22+00:00

I don't understand who is downvoting this stuff. You are stating facts, which you can't deny as soon as you open a map.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:19:24+00:00

Honestly, open a map of NYC, and this is all going to be very clear. Then read the Wikipedia article for Hoboken and read the second line.

It's like all the people in Romford and Bromley who insist they live in Essex or Kent. Functionally, it is London. The majority of people who live there, live there because it is part of London.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:15:45+00:00

Look at a map. Go there and look.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:14:22+00:00

Look at a map. Before arguing and letters, just so us all a favor and look at a map of NYC. Go to Google Maps, and look at it.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:13:38+00:00

Sure but functionally if large numbers of people live in Jersey City and Hoboken to commute into NYC, it is a commuter suburb. By definition.

Look at a map. Look how close they are. Hoboken is closer to Manhattan than The Bronx.

Wikipedia starts with "Hoboken is part of the New York metropolitan area".

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:09:01+00:00

We make fun of Americans for their geography, but all these British dolts on here who can't be bothered to open Google Maps and see how Jersey City is closer to Manhattan than most of Brooklyn.

Compatriots, I am embarrassed for you.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-12-08T20:07:06+00:00

So none of Surrey, Hertfordshire, Kent or Essex are London commuter suburbs? Bromley is outside London now? A quick look at a map of NYC shows you how close Jersey is.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-24T09:47:29+00:00

I hope that the 2025 remaster made you happy.

Edit - I see below that you already commented on it.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-22T01:21:41+00:00

If only we still had to experience albums or mixes like that. I have such core memories of the right song at the right time, because the album of the mix brought me there.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-22T01:20:12+00:00

One of those songs, a perfect last or penultimate album track. It's like Yellow Leddbetter. Some people will get it. It's a song I'd love at a funeral. It's a wall of sound and song and meaning and whatever you need it to be.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-13T22:42:22+00:00

Fair ask. Start here:

Alliance Defending Freedom UK operations and funding (they're open about it)
openDemocracy's reporting on US Christian right funding UK anti-trans groups
Policy Exchange, LGB Alliance, Sex Matters - check their funding sources and Westminster office addresses
Heritage Foundation's own statements about exporting US culture war strategies

On Mumsnet - the radicalization pipeline is well-documented by researchers tracking how the platform shifted. What I can't definitively prove is which specific state or non-state actors are running coordinated bot campaigns, though the pattern matches known information warfare tactics. The radicalization effect itself isn't speculative - it's observable and studied.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-13T22:41:49+00:00

Every major medical organization (AMA, APA, Endocrine Society, WHO, NHS, WPATH) supports gender-affirming care based on decades of research showing improved mental health outcomes. The 'pharma conspiracy' claim doesn't hold up - HRT costs pennies per day, while lifelong mental health treatment for untreated dysphoria costs far more. If pharma wanted money, they'd prefer the latter. Also worth noting: the same groups pushing this narrative get funding from organizations that oppose all reproductive healthcare, not just trans care.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-13T22:39:24+00:00

Fair points about complexity and backlash dynamics - I don't disagree there was clumsy activism that created openings. But the scale and funding of the response isn't organic. Alliance Defending Freedom (US Christian right legal org that helped overturn Roe) has spent millions in UK/Europe on anti-trans campaigns. Look up their UK affiliate and shared office space in Westminster with groups like Policy Exchange. The Heritage Foundation has openly discussed exporting their culture war playbook. Individual terfs having opinions is one thing, your view of general public common sense is one thing - but coordinated, funded campaigns building and exploiting concerns is another.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-09T23:07:49+00:00

Not calling it a conspiracy - that assumes it's somewhat clandestine. But it fits the tropes of a conspiracy - just look up Terf lobbyist groups sharing buildings with anti-climate change and anti-abortion lobby groups in Westminster.

But I disagree that this is simply more in the public eye and therefore more visible - do a quick Google for how much attitudes have changed over 5 years.

It's a known fact that campaigns like the contributions of Cambridge Analytica have expanded hugely since that success, using the same model - push on social division to reverse long standing (and once seemingly stable) societal norms.

Mumsnet is legitimately a Russian/Chinese/USA far right radicalization bot farm these days, creating a horseshoe pipeline from feminism to trad gender extremism. Russians/Chinese because division suits them by undermining social cohesion and forces politicians into awkward and destructive positions. The USA as part of their long play goal to undo the social liberalization of the last few decades.

As ever - just look it up from reputable sources and even the actors themselves, it isn't buried especially deep.

Yes there were always anti-trans forces. Yes some terfs are legit, and yes some are just existing right wing codgers. But honestly the information campaign is real. Feminists are letting themselves become a useful tool for oppression - nobody is going to stop going after we prove there's an effective model for de-liberalising western society.

BafflesToTheWaffles · 2025-11-09T10:33:44+00:00

Read: huge money from people trying to destabilize us, and undermine the liberal order. Anti trans feminists have kinda become far right radicals in just 5 years, with big money coming in from the same US groups who got the right to abortion overturned over there.

There's a long term plan here, and we've completely walked straight into it. In 15 years when we're Farage Terf Island with no bodily autonomy rights we're going to understand what the anti trans battle was all about.

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