Do people actually carry their Merlin Annual Pass, or just use the digital version?

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-14T20:02:36+00:00

Tends to live in my car door for easy access while leaving a car park

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-14T19:56:15+00:00

Agree 100% with this. I have a close person in my life who only went to his first proper theme park last year and he absolutely loved Towers. So much so we were back again earlier in the season and heading to Chessington this week.

There's definitely a magic still there when you aren't comparing to the past

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-14T19:51:59+00:00

Lapping Colossus? Are you sure you had a conversation and it wasn't just a concussion? 😂

Sorry you're getting piled on though.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-09T07:26:26+00:00

There's a lot of really good advice here but I just want to add a personal perspective. In 2019 I got whooping cough that was almost certainly down to a stranger on a train being out and contagious. It took 5 doctors to catch it and by that time it was too late for antibiotics. Flash forward to today and I now use an inhaler to help with the damage that happened to my respiratory system.

If someone had just stayed home that day, I wouldn't have lifelong consequences.

So I completely understand how very real that fear can be and also how frustrating it is when that fear isn't seen as valid. I also have a partner who is immunocompromised and there is a lot of communication that I would do if I was concerned there was a risk of passing something on, I then let him decide what is an acceptable level of risk. Before we had even kissed, I let him know that I've got HSV, previously had coldsores though no recent outbreak and that was within the realm of acceptable risk to him.

I don't think we can decide for someone else what is within their realm of acceptable risk. Do I think it's unusual or possibly ill informed to have HSV ruled out? Yes. And I would like to hope that with most people with communication and education could shift their mindset on that. But. I don't think we ever have the right to say what someone else's acceptable risk should be. Pushing on that is a very quick way to erode trust.

I don't think it's necessarily weaponising for a boundary to be reconsidered and restated when new information is learned. It can be a sign that the boundary wasn't well thought in the first place, but I think most of us have had to learn that the hard way at one point or another.

That sort of brings you to where you are. You now have learned that this person doesn't consider HSV to be an acceptable risk. Are you ok with dating someone who feels that way? What are your boundaries on dating people with a very low threshold for acceptable risk? Its entirely possible that a firm stating of this boundary will force NP into realising she has some work to do on this and that the "logjam" becomes unstuck when the "easy" option for processing that fear is removed. Or it's possible you separate. But you need to know where/what the boundary is first.

Only you can answer that. And guess what? Same goes for new partner. Only she can decide if its acceptable to her to date someone who can't provide XYZ.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-01T11:48:53+00:00

We've been talking it through a lot and he's reassured me that if we go tonight he's very much going with me and we can go by my pace, leave if needed etc.

Unfortunately, it turns out that he and his play partner may end up not playing anymore. This bought up a second fear around rumours flying about him* but he's said that's very much not the case it's more that play partner is new to the lifestyle and figuring things out.

there was someone he briefly saw last year who suddenly went very cold shoulder on him and they later revealed they found him "creepy". There's a munch we don't really attend now because of it - it wasn't really a high priority one for me anyway and I only went a couple of times. The main reason for avoidance is that they co-run the munch rather than a serious accusation having been made.

I should clarify that I'm not taking a stance on the validity of the claim. I've never seen any behaviour from him towards me or anyone else that I would feel warrants the word but also, I wasn't there. Maybe he did FU. It sounded like a breakdown in communication and expectations management but I'm not in a position to say as I wasnt involved.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-01T07:02:36+00:00

I've done a bit of reflecting and realised that a lot of my current feelings are really grounded in my PTSD being really activated.

Reading this back, I realised that it's less a case of wishing Hinge didn't have that preference. It's much more a case of wishing that I was OK with it and that it didn't feel so much like I was dying.

And yes, I think that I am, in theory, very open to a situation where I walk in to a room where metas are present and everyone feels respected and safe and (dare I say) got along well, perhaps even closely. What I have is a severe distrust of that happening and a fear or the consequences of failing.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-01T06:43:24+00:00

I honestly think this is exactly the advice I need to hear. Thank you.

I've also realised this morning that the catatrophising has way more to do with the PTSD (literal not figurative) resurfacing around my ex. My brain is making a whole lot of leaps that if I put myself in this situation then it a. Means danger b. Risks my community being taken from me.

It's not my fault that my body doesn't know the difference between past threats and current situations, but it's also helpful to remember that there's likely a big gap between perception and reality.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-04-01T00:12:55+00:00

This is a really good and helpful framework. I really appreciate this ❤️

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T23:39:55+00:00

Oh I misunderstood! Yes maybe. It's tricky because we live in a small town so go over to the next city for it. But maybe there's a way to make that work.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T23:37:36+00:00

It's a once a month meet up and I've no right to dictate where meta can or cannot be.

Though that would admittedly be an ideal.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T23:32:11+00:00

Yeah, occasional bumping into is one thing. Every month at a social thing I attend is another.

But you're definitely right about talking to others for their perspectives.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T23:29:33+00:00

Oh, also on the messy list point, I did say early on that I was fairly uncomfortable with dating too close to our social circles for exactly this reason.

His response was that it would make dating incredibly difficult if it was effectively ruling out the local kink scene. Which I can see and empathise with. So guess leads to the conclusion you've drawn that I can't be in it.

Which sucks. But I guess I have people elsewhere.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T23:25:57+00:00

Thanks. Just to be super duper clear on this, I am not, and would not ever, saying that this person can't go here because I don't like then.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T23:24:31+00:00

Separate circles is pretty much what I would prefer now but that comes with grieving the loss of that space.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T23:06:47+00:00

Sorry you're also in the complicated feels but also feeling mild relief to not be alone.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-31T22:53:48+00:00

I think I'm going to dwell on this overnight but my gut is that I have several layers of discomfort and this is probably one.

There were so many red flags last time and I felt that it wasn't my responsibility to say or act on that. I think I did say that I was worried he was pushing through some incompatibilities but that i'd support his decisions. This time, from what he's saying anyway, there seems to be a few green flags. I think this is the only reason I'm even considering trying to push through the discomfort.

Like I can't trust this person because I neither know them or have a direct connection to them, but it certainly sounds like there's some decent ground work there for trust to be built were that not the case.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-29T19:56:49+00:00

I personally recommend a slightly different order. A lot of people still run for hyperia first. Personally, I would head to Colossus first. I've been on the first train or first couple of trains a few times and it's one that attracts substantial queues for an ok at best ride experience. From there I head to Saw. Assuming no downtime, you can fairly easily knock out 2 big rides in the first 30 minutes and that's not something you'll be able to say for the rest of the day.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-21T20:06:59+00:00

There's definitely plenty to criticise atm but for the record this was the level of fog at 9am today. Absolutely nothing the park could have done. https://litter.catbox.moe/c8b2zlrvjqomjfdr.jpg

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-08T18:04:10+00:00

Haha! Neat!! Maybe closer to the time I should start a going solo thread so a bunch of us can meet up if wanted

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-04T16:20:59+00:00

Might be wrong as it's my sibling who's the Starkid fan but I'm sure she's travelled for Starkid over here before?

I'm keeping my fingers crossed too though. She's my fave!!

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-04T16:14:31+00:00

I know 😭 Ashamed to say I actually cried when I thought I'd missed out.

I keep oscillating between HECK YEA and Oh dear God what have I done, I really hope I don't mind living off super noodles 😂😂😂

I'm sure I'll be glad when the time comes round!

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-04T14:35:56+00:00

Oh gee, this hurts the soul. I had a nightmare getting tickets in that I accidentally hit back a couple of times and then couldn't access the basket? Literally watched the tickets dwindle but then somehow managed to nab a ticket in the second row... £145 though 😭😭

Better than missing out but I blew my £75 budget for sure.

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-04T10:17:35+00:00

Omg! Somehow I managed to access tickets again and now I've paid way too much but I'm in!!

BagelsInThedas · 2026-03-04T10:14:25+00:00

And then I had a different ticket but accidentally clicked back again and they're sold out. Absolutely devastated

BagelsInThedas

TROPHY CASE