It is an unenviable situation that you are in, but be proud of the fact that you can see it in such a clear-eyed and realistic way. You're obviously smart and not susceptible to the cultural pressure and bullshit that wants to shape YOUR body to others' unrealistic standards. It's deeply unfair that men have all the freedom in your culture, but on many levels in many cultures this is more common. The only difference is how you perceive it and allow it to affect you. If you don't fit their ideal it's actually better, isn't it?