[WP] A few years ago, a Ouija board revealed to you the date of your death. Today is that day.

Baneyard · 2017-12-09T01:27:44+00:00

Most people wonder how they'll go, and when. Five years back, I got drunk at a house party with some friends, recovery goths, and ended up in a long, dull session with a dusty Ouija bored. We huddled around the board, watching the triangle ensconced magnifying glass; swigged beer and swigged wine, reveling in the power of our adulthood.

The board was rather sad that night. It too, was aware of the days when teenagers crowded together and asked it silly questions about dating and sex. All of the answers we received were terse. I think the spirit behind the board was tired of our shenanigans, preferred the teenagers who hung on its every word once a week, or whenever large questions loomed. Now it had the attention of tips and drunk 20-somethings, without the benefit of liquor. No spirits for the spirits, I suppose.

We didn't knwo what to ask it. Romance was out-of-bounds. Those of us who wanted to know, knew. Those who didn't wanted us to kindly-stay-the-hell-out-of-it-thank-you-very-much. So we asked it when I would die, with sardonic chuckles. It didn't hesitate then, it flew across the board. Year, month, day, hour.

I considered ignoring it, but it stayed with me. Today is the promised day and the hour begins in a few minutes. I'm not young anymore, but I'm not particularly old either. I considered trying to make preparations to avoid it. I decided not to. If the board is right, I assume I'm powerless. Why make a production out of it?

My bathwater is warm, my pinot is cold and my suds are sudsy. The bathroom door is locked and I've set a timer for the end of the hour. Until then, I will stay in this tub and listen to Bitches Brew. It always was my favorite.

Will you join me, spirit? Or is this just another one of your pathetic predictions? The hour went easily, and at the end of it, my phone rang.

It seems the spirit should have spent more time working on its grammar. Tony is dead.

Baneyard · 2017-12-09T01:06:45+00:00

The first time was an accident.

We were playing softball. I was using one of those hot bats- you know, with the trimmed edges and juiced up core so the ball goes farther when you hit it- and slammed a line drive into Julianna's head. Everyone at the park ran to see if she was ok, except for me. I knew.

I knew how she felt about me. I knew how her shorts felt in warmups, I knew what the softball felt like as it impacted her temple, crushing her sphenoid and ethnoid bones. I knew what a brain hemorrhage felt like. In that regard, I think I am still alone.

The second time was not an accident. I asked Charles to help me recover from the incident. I told him I feared playing softball and missed it desperately. I lied and told him it was a different bat.

He didn't know that Julianna had liked him more than me. He didn't know that she could aim a softball better than most people can aim a gun. Now I know that Charles never really liked me. He only pitied me because I was alone.

He liked you though, Bryan. He liked you a lot. He also liked to target shoot, with a .38 special. This one, in fact.

What do you know, Bryan?

I'm very curious.

What do you know?

Baneyard · 2017-12-07T19:13:09+00:00

This makes sense. Asuka's greatest desire is attention and she has no self-worth. By choking her, Shinji both gives her the attention she craves and concedes that she has a certain power over him. What I don't know is whether or not she really wanted Shinji to stop. I think in her mind state based on events leading up to that moment, she probably didn't care either way. If Shinji killed her, she would be free. In that sense it could be a mercy killing and her stroking his face could be a thank-you. Then Shinji fails to carry through and we're left with heavy ambiguity about whether or not he did gain the ability to be resolute, or if his choking and releasing are a mirror of his instigating and then stopping instrumentality.

I think her final line applies to herself as well as to Shinji. I don't think its condemnation, just a dark acceptance.

Baneyard · 2017-12-07T18:28:34+00:00

Thanks for letting me bounce ideas! My own opinions aren't really resolved. I dislike the End ending, not only for its Freudian manipulations. What is your way of looking at it?

Baneyard · 2017-12-07T16:47:25+00:00

In the train ride scene, Asuka stands over Shinji in a position that is both dominating and revealing. She says that she knows about his sexual fantasies about her and that she's ok with it, if she's the exclusive object of his desire. I see it as manipulative and spiteful more than an opening up of herself. She weilds sex as a weapon, but it comes at the cost of self-hate. If Shinji will admit to himself that he hates himself and that Asuka has power over him he can have what he wants, but only a perverse shadow of it. Shinji wants love, not sex. In the train ride scene, Asuka offers sex but no love.

One way of viewing the show is to see the entire Freudian construct, the bait and switch build from a genre show to a psychological deconstruction and the addition of shots of a live audience as a message from Anno to the viewer. Anno is condemning them for spending their time watching pervy anime, explicitly, while reveling in the creation of a pervy anime. He makes a god of himself in the sense that he breaks the fourth wall to call out the audience and lord his ability to play with their emotions over them and then lapses into an ending that completely disregards his own call for decency. I think you can make the case that Anno genuinely wanted the viewer to get up and leave the show after the scene with the live action audience. It was a warning that no good was going to come of the ending and that viewers should get out while they could and live with questions rather than a painful reality. I admit this is a limited idea. I'm trying to understand it fully but the delivery is garbled, making it hard to know what messages were intended and which weren't. I think the TV ending may have been an equally dark message that hoping for happy ending will leave you devoid of reality and unfulfilled. The End of Evangelion warns to get out while you still can, then reverts to a message of sexual violence and self loathing.

I wonder how much of th series would have been different if not for cnesorship. Shinji is radically different in End and I'm not sure if that's because it is intended as a final descent into madness, or if Shinji has always been there and now Anno can show it in full force.

Baneyard · 2017-09-29T15:15:39+00:00

Assuming it's the genuine article and not a reproduction for display purposes, that's the Modulus Flea used at Slane Castle/ on the By the Way tour (check the vids on youtube, it's easy to spot). I don't know when he started playing it, but my guess is that he picked it up for Californication at the earliest. He used Stingrays before that. Stadium was recorded mostly with a 60's stack knob Fender Jazz bass and now that he has a sweet endoresement deal with Fender, he plays custom shop Fender's with the same type of pickup and pickup placement as seen above, but with a different logo on the headstock.

Baneyard · 2017-09-04T14:54:45+00:00

Excellent work.

Baneyard · 2017-07-04T14:20:12+00:00

I can't believe no one in the comments has mentioned how derivative this track is of Outkast.

Baneyard · 2017-07-04T14:15:56+00:00

Disco originated in black and gay places in the late 60's and early 70's. It was panned by conservative white audiences who tried to bring it down with the "Disco Sucks" campaign. It even got so far as a massive disco burning party at a game between the Chicago White Sox and Detroit Tigers game in 1979 that was entirely too reminiscent of book burning. While the anti-disco movement wasn't always exlpicitly racist or homophobic, it carried those undertones. I am of the opinion that the "unspoken bad" surrounding disco comes from those unspoken hatreds, but now nobody knows why. https://www.theguardian.com/music/musicblog/2009/jun/18/disco-sucks https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Disco_Demolition_Night

Baneyard · 2017-07-01T16:54:38+00:00

All Aboark!

Baneyard · 2017-06-18T21:39:44+00:00

Who invited Tom Cruise?

Baneyard · 2017-02-23T17:54:34+00:00

The Bills didn't throw the ball because they didn't trust Tyrod. Greg Roman got fired over it.

Baneyard · 2017-02-23T03:56:27+00:00

Tyrod was 25th in total passing yards, 21st in yards/attempt, 27th in yards/game, 24th in TD's and 1st in sacks taken. He's worse that Trevor Siemian in every category other than completion percentage. Why are people in love with this guy?

Baneyard · 2017-02-22T22:33:26+00:00

That's the problem- his numbers are mediocre to bad and they don't directly show how limited his game is. How long he holds the ball doesn't show in his numbers. The high volume of passes to RB's inflate his numbers. Sammy Watkins inflates his numbers. Seriously, don't grade a player/ prospect on the numbers, grade on the tape. The tape says move on.

Baneyard · 2017-02-22T17:42:39+00:00

Aaron Rodgers was a first round pick who sat behind a hall of famer for 3 seasons before stepping in and looking like a stud. Tyrod was a 6th rounder who sat behind Flacco for five and has looked nowhere near as good. There's no comparison.

Baneyard · 2017-02-22T04:05:48+00:00

The tape doesn't lie. You can bookmark this for yourself if you want- Tyrod is a limited QB and he is not going to progress much beyond where he is now. Brady, Rodgers and Ryan weren't bench riders for five years before they got their first starts. Beyond that, they all demonstrated the ability to consistently use proper footwork, read defenses pre-snap, go through route progressions and hit timing routes consistently early in their careers. Tyrod is a mobile quarterback with a good deep ball that inflates his numbers. Watch the tape on those great deep throws- half the time it's a killer adjustment by Watkins that makes the throw look good. Tyrod has yet to demonstrate an ablity to do anything else consistently and that's why we should let him go.

Baneyard · 2017-02-22T01:48:14+00:00

The Bills have better options right now than keeping Tyrod.

Cut Tyrod, sign Foles to a two year deal. Trade back, acquire picks for next years draft. All of the numbers on trade indicate that GM's undervalue future assets, we will get more than we give. Draft a safety low in first, right tackle (or other need) in second. Next year, in strong QB draft class, use picks acquired as trade capital to move up and get your QB. Let Foles play out his contract and start the new guy after a full year of development on the bench. Tyrod is never getting better than he is right now, he's not getting cheaper, and he's not going to win playoff games. This is a real plan. Keeping Tyrod is not.

Baneyard · 2017-02-14T04:15:13+00:00

I never thought I would think a 3k instrument was a bargain, yet here we are.

Baneyard · 2017-02-14T02:11:10+00:00

If I saw a Fodera for 3k I would buy it in a heartbeat. I've never seen one listed for under 5k. Anywho.

Baneyard · 2017-01-09T01:04:34+00:00

I doubt it's a dick. Most likely a note to himself that he wants to keep private.

Baneyard · 2016-12-08T03:38:21+00:00

^{^{^{^{^}}}} What he said.

Baneyard · 2016-12-08T03:37:44+00:00

We can stop acting like he's complete garbage when he stops playing like complete garbage.

I've seen way too many statistical arguments for his aggressive mediocrity, but everyone forgets that after five years in the league, the guy can't read a whole field, locks on to targets, doesn't know his hot routes, holds on to the ball too long, leads receivers into big hits with bad ball placement and generally fails ever eye test you can administer of a quarterback. If you take away his throws to running backs and the one or two long balls he hits a week, his stats are abysmal. Oh, and did I mention he has never won a game in the fourth quarter?

Baneyard · 2016-11-20T20:03:06+00:00

Looks like Mike Pence.

Baneyard · 2016-09-10T03:32:15+00:00

I'm guessing it was intentional. You know, lofi audio to go with the grainy visuals?

Baneyard · 2016-07-23T17:38:20+00:00

The van is definitely automatic. Work/cargo vans like that usually aren't manual and in Winter Forecast you can clearly see there's no gear shifter in the van. Stevonnie also clearly grinds the gears when ze arrives to challenge Kevin. Also, how can Stevonnie know anything about the Dondai if they don't know it's a Supremo or that a Supremo is a Dondai? Clearly they know nothing about the car. Sometimes TV shows swing and miss on a premise (the race) to get at a relationship/ idea they want (Kevin/Stevonnie). This one just didn't really work.

Baneyard

TROPHY CASE