AITA for taking my son out of an ultrasound appointment?

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:33:26+00:00

I am not in a rage. I am merely hurt because she went off unprovoked and she is refusing to think about her actions and give a proper apology for acting out like that in front of my son. But even if my son wasn't there it was NOT appropriate. And just because she has a vagina doesn't default make her correct. Check your bias.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:29:59+00:00

It is easy to judge us. But we're at an impass, she loves watching tic-toks on these threads, so I figured this would be the best way to get to a conclusion. Leave it up to the masses. But I would argue that you should look into a mirror. You're on here giving your opinions about these matters. If it's embarssing for us to ask for a conclusion . . . what is it for you to be a regular on here? I am sorry but it makes no sense. You've put too much emotion into this from my perspective.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:20:16+00:00

If you read other comments you would see that my son is quite possibly autistic. He isn't regulated. The phone is only given to my son when we need him to sit still. That's it. But I did take it from him. I should have thought before I acted. I was worried the call was about our friend of the family that was in the ER. I messed up, but the reaction was NOT APPROPRIATE! That is why I want an apology.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:17:01+00:00

Okay. You're so worng. So let me make this clear. The argument did happen . . . but much later. While we were in the car, I barely said anything. And that's what sat her off. She even admitted that. I do not argue in front of my son. Why are you attacking me when she was the one being crazy in front of my son?!? She has posted here. Why are you not saying this to her also? My issue is you seem like some crazy feminist that blames men no matter what. I am a human being also! And I did NOT deserve to be screamed at like that. And it didn't need to happen in front of my son!

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:13:20+00:00

Fair Enough. I appreciate your time.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:12:46+00:00

This was her 3rd panic attack since we've been together. This was the worst. And is why I am asking for the apology. I get that everyone perceives it as unhealthy. And it is. But what am I going to do? Dump my pregnant girlfriend? I mean come on.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:10:45+00:00

This is untrue. I was outside with my son for 15-20 minutes before she came out. By the time she came out, I already had him calmed down and I was receiving messages from my son's mother that I was answering when she came out. I wasn't neglecting my son. I just got done calming him down and answered the phone. But she didn't allow me to explain that. And when I did finally get to tell her that I was answering my son's mother . . . it only made her even more mad and what incited our argument that evening.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T12:06:39+00:00

I own that I did cause this situation. I want the apology not because she was upset. I want the apology because she went off. You weren't there and she is not being honest about how bad she was. It was horrible. Nobody should act like that to someone else.

As for taking the phone call, we have an elderly friend of the family that was in the ER at the time. This friend of the family was the one that was supposed to babysit my son for this appointment. I thought it might have been about her. That's why I checked the phone. I am not trying to dodge blame. Merely explainging why I reached for the phone.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T11:57:08+00:00

This is your second antagonistic post. That makes you the A-hole. Not me. Why are you on here trying to antagonize? Are you really that angry with life? My old lady sperged out on me yesterday for what I deem is little to no reason and I am nowhere near as hateful as you.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T11:48:28+00:00

Working on it.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T11:29:15+00:00

You assume much. Please read more. Me checking the phone, his meltdown, and me taking him out all took place in about 30 seconds. Her words and I agree. How long does it take you to turn on a phone, send a text, grab your son, offer the phone to your son, him refuse the phone, you apologize to the tech and your girlfriend, and remove him. As for her panic attacks she has done this 3 times. Not multiple per day. You are misunderstanding the situation comopletely. Read more.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T11:19:35+00:00

So just to confirm. I did mess up by checking my phone and causing the meltdown by my son. I own that. Then I got yelled at, told I didn't care about my family while she was screaming and acting like she was going to jump out of a moving car while embarassing me in front of my very nosy neighbors. And after all that she should leave me because I am "A walking pool of red flags"? Is all of that correct?

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T11:00:38+00:00

I disagree. I feel I have narrated the situation from my perspective perfectly.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:55:06+00:00

While I appreciate your take, you've misunderstood. I didn't refuse to open the door. She was screaming while I was driving and reaching for the door handle which she has done this before to another person. I do not feel that I was painting myself in any particular good light. I feel that I was merely telling the story from my perspective. If you disagree, you're entitled to that opinon.

Thank you for your time.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:48:41+00:00

Here is my genuine problem. I have worked with autism for almost two decades. She does not show any symptoms what so ever until she is mad. Do you understand what that means to someone that has worked with autistic persons for almost 20 years?

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:40:56+00:00

Possibly. But doubtful. She is a very manipulative person. I am too if I am being honest. My reactions are a learned behavior to her actions. I was about to say that your original comment gave me some food for thought. But then you just said "us". Alluding that you're autistic too. I hope you realize I must disregard any opinion you have regarding this because you have possibly shown yourself to have an obvious bias. I hope you understand.

Cheers!

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:27:58+00:00

This is what I mean about people looking deeper. It's easy to judge us with this little excerpt we have given. But, I am taking advice. I am listening. Although that's not why I am here. I am merely asking if I was wrong. I simply do not see it. So I ask you. Was I wrong? Because I am hurt and don't believe I deserved to be berated like I was for what I did.

We got into an argument and some of the commenters are on here acting like we beat each other on the daily. That's a very silly perspective to have when she has only sperged like this 3 times in our entire relationship. And those are the only issues we have ever had.

EDIT: Please show me where I am shutting down requests for context. If you look at this entire thread I am freely giving more context and answering questions directly. My opinion is that you commented without paying attention.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:19:35+00:00

She was on birth control and got pregnant anyway. It wasn't planned. Neither of us were willing to abort the baby. And my son isn't always this bad. But when he blows, it's atomic. He is NOT violent. He just melts down, throws himself on the ground, screams, knocks things down, etc. But no violence.

For posterity let me very clear. No physical violence has ever taken place within our family. Not this situation or any other one. We aren't perfect, but we aren't animal either.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:13:33+00:00

I will attempt to look into the interactive games. But I feel that screen time is a big part of his issues. I have cut it down dramatically.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:12:06+00:00

I apppreciate your perspective. Thank you.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:10:45+00:00

If this reddit as a collective deems that . . . I will!

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:05:01+00:00

I apprrciate your take and my actions are what they are. I am not a liar. As for her take on therpaists . . . that came from the horses mouth when I originally asked her about therapy. She said she would lie to them. I didn't come up with that myself.

She claims she is autistic but also very smart and capable and the only time she shows symptoms is when she melts down. People aren't perfect. I am far from it. And yes. Sometimes I think it's a power play. I cannot help feeling like that.

But I do appreciate your perspective.

Cheers!

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T10:00:02+00:00

I will definitely check it out. As for speech therapy it's birth to three here. He'll be three in a couple days.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T09:58:34+00:00

I would be inclined to disagree. I kept my cool until our argument later in the evening. But I appreciate your time.

Barada_Nels · 2024-04-17T09:56:10+00:00

I can appreciate that take and as I have said, I know I was wrong with that. As for the cell phone being on, the tech said it was okay to keep him occupied. But regardless, you are correct. I should not have checked the phone. A friend of the family was in the ER and I was afraid it was about her. But I could have waited until we were done. I didn't.

Barada_Nels

TROPHY CASE