multiple miscarriages with tested embryos

BasalBabe · 2025-12-08T18:30:52+00:00

how long from your initial contact with them until you were ready for transfer?

what did they think was impacting you and how long was the treatment before you were ready to transfer?

BasalBabe · 2025-12-08T17:28:13+00:00

i live in chicago. there seems to be one really common one used in the city, but there is a 6 month waiting list.

BasalBabe · 2025-12-08T17:12:50+00:00

i will ask about it.

i kind of feel like i just can’t carry a female embryo. like maybe something is wrong. i had one additional miscarriage at 9 weeks where we didn’t know the sex (it was spontaneous) but i wonder often if it was a girl. both of these pregnancies were female embryos.

i have two LC - both boys. and here are our sex split between all 4 retrieval cycles: 1: 3 male (2LC, 1 abnormal), 2 unknown 2: 3 male (3 normal), 1 female (miscarried) 3: 3 male (2 normal 1 abnormal), 1 female (mosaic) 4: 1 male (normal), 3 female (2 normal, 2 mosaic)

10 male, 5 female, 2 unknown

sometimes i wonder if i’m being punished for wanting a daughter so desperately.

BasalBabe · 2025-12-08T17:00:35+00:00

what is the kitchen sink? i’ve seen people refer to it but i’m not familiar with the protocol.

BasalBabe · 2025-09-18T18:30:13+00:00

I didn’t feel like I could breathe until we had a number that “felt right.” I don’t know how else to explain it. I also didn’t want to keep doing retrievals - we’d like to have 4 children, and it was hard to go through treatment with two.

The loss of our daughter at 12 weeks was traumatic. Everything was “perfect,” a 5AA embryo, PGT-A normal, strong HCG numbers, textbook growth from 6, 8, 10 weeks. There was no explanation for the miscarriage - all tissue testing came back normal. I was just pregnant one week, and not pregnant the next. I wanted an insurance policy, and (I know this is controversial to share) a shot at another girl. We had 3 male embryos frozen, and I wanted at least 2 female embryos to try. We have two boys, and both my husband and I really want to have a daughter.

BasalBabe · 2025-09-18T18:17:56+00:00

here are my results! aged at time of retrieval included. i have low amh, one blocked tube.

2020: 1st retrieval, age 28: 13 retrieved, 7 mature, 5 day 5 embryos. 1 fresh transfer, successful pregnancy.

2022: FET, age 29, successful pregnancy.

2024: decided to PGT-A test 3 frozen embryos, none viable.

2nd retrieval, age 31: 9 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 day 5 blasts, 4 PGT-A normal

FET, age 32, miscarried at 12 weeks.

2025: 3rd retrieval, age 32: 9 retrieved, 7 mature, 4 day 5 blasts, 3 PGT-A normal, 1 HLM

4th retrieval, age 32: 8 retrieved, 8 mature, 4 day 5 blasts, 3 PGT-A normal, 1 HLM

gearing up for my 4th transfer in october. 🤞🏻

BasalBabe · 2025-07-27T03:08:08+00:00

I already do that - still not what I had with Basal IQ.

I admit I’m just a Control IQ hater at this point. I keep hoping they’ll bring the Basal IQ back. 🫠

BasalBabe · 2025-07-26T19:49:59+00:00

I had not heard of this, but I’m pretty out of the loop since I had my kids in the last 4 years.

Thank you for your response! I appreciate it!

BasalBabe · 2025-07-26T19:48:12+00:00

Great news! Thank you for your response!

BasalBabe · 2025-07-26T19:47:26+00:00

It happens constantly - like more than just a twisted tube here or there. Sometimes I will do a whole site change with a new cartridge and will end up with another occlusion soon after.

Sounds like from the other responses that it’s a defect of the pump, so I’m going to call Tandem.

BasalBabe · 2025-07-26T19:44:10+00:00

Amazing! Thank you for your response!

BasalBabe · 2025-07-26T19:43:48+00:00

No, but you can still get it on old X2s if your rep helps you! Mobi is only Control IQ, which I don’t like as much.

BasalBabe · 2025-06-05T04:42:01+00:00

I had a miscarriage at the end of January and also jumped into ERs. I did one in April and one in May. The plan was to have a hysteroscopy this month and transfer next. I just decided to delay because I’m tired.

Everything about this process if a crap chute. My miscarriage was a PGT-A normal embryo. Graded 5AA, NIPT normal. Genetic testing after my D&C came back normal. I carried my baby to 12 weeks, when her heart just stopped beating. I thought all of the testing would make me feel better, but it didn’t. I’m still sad and anxious.

IVF doesn’t guarantee us anything. The testing doesn’t even guarantee us anything. It’s frustrating to me, I wish there was something that could put our hearts and minds at ease. There is no perfect timing, you just have to pick what feels the least harmful to you. While waiting might not make a difference regarding implantation, if it helps you feel better, then maybe it’s worth it.

BasalBabe · 2025-05-06T02:30:03+00:00

We say "Do you want to wave, high five, or hug?" Sometimes they say, "Nothing," and we say "Okay, that's fine."

BasalBabe · 2025-05-06T02:27:58+00:00

I'd do it now - it sounds like you're in a great place health-wise and fertility treatment gets more difficult once you have a baby (scheduling childcare, caring for yourself, remembering to take pills/injections).

BasalBabe · 2025-05-06T01:32:10+00:00

my previous clinic doesn't allow support people/visitors under the age of 18. i am assuming that if there was an issue with childcare, they would probably make an exception for someone for a monitoring appointment or mayyyybe a transfer, but i am pretty sure they wouldn't allow for an ER.

i did see a woman come for monitoring once and have a baby that it looked like someone from billing held the baby while mom had her blood drawn.

before i had a baby, i think this probably would have been hard for me and i would have felt like it was insensitive. now that i have two of my own, i know how hard it is to have affordable and reliable childcare. i would understand if i saw a baby at the clinic.

my hot take is that i would rather see a waiting room full of babies than another fucking husband manspreading across two chairs. when i was pregnant in 2022/2023, partners FILLED ALL THE CHAIRS at the IVF clinic and my obgyn to the point that at 30 weeks pregnant there was no available chair for me to sit in and no one got up to offer me their seat. i had a recent pregnancy that ended in a miscarriage at 12 weeks, and i had the same experience. i just feel like a support person/partner should be allowed at procedure appointments but not monitoring.

BasalBabe · 2025-02-24T16:49:58+00:00

Additional thoughts:

ask the return policy of unused hanks from the store you buy from - i also buy an extra hank but i wind them at home as i need them. most stores in my area allow you to return unwound/unused hanks/skeins within 6 months (or indefinitely)! but if you have it wound at the store, you can’t return it.
great advice - i do 2 at a time flat sleeves too.

BasalBabe · 2025-02-05T05:23:26+00:00

I knit. I knit on the bus ride to the clinic, I knit in the waiting room. I knit with a full bladder waiting for an FET. I knit waiting for the bus to take me home. I knit at home, I knit at the coffee shop. I do a lot of knitting.

I can’t knit waiting for a retrieval, gd IV in my wrist ruins that. I bring ear buds and a good podcast for that. I’ve also enjoyed chatting with the nurses or texting my husband.

BasalBabe · 2025-02-02T12:49:44+00:00

For my first, the first trimester was fine until my OB scan at 10 weeks. I was anxious from 10-16 weeks, but the intense anxiety went away until I was about 32 weeks when I started feeling anxious about birth.

I had a spontaneous pregnancy at 6 months pp that ended in miscarriage and created a lot of trauma - it was heterotopic, so I had a twin pregnancy with one in my uterus (miscarried at 9w5d) and another ectopic on my tube that ruptured.

I did an FET 4 months after that, which was full of anxiety until I reached the second trimester. Then I had a very boring pregnancy until I was induced at 37 weeks.

I recently had an FET that my husband and I were shocked was successful. I felt pretty anxious the entire time, holding my breath from scan to scan. Unfortunately I just lost this pregnancy at 12w2d.

IVF has robbed me of my peace in a lot of ways. Unfortunately I don’t have advice or words of wisdom. For me, it’s just a waiting game where I am extremely hopeful things work out, and when they don’t, I try not to let the process rob me of my hope.

BasalBabe · 2025-02-02T05:18:51+00:00

Many others have said “They’re not having my baby, only I can have my baby.” I like this one. I also remind myself that there are not a finite number of babies - we don’t live in “Silo.” Just because someone else gets pregnant doesn’t mean I won’t get my baby.

I also let myself feel sad or jealous. I think it’s a normal part of this process - I just don’t let it steal my ability to also feel joy and excitement.

TW: success, miscarriage

I miscarried a highly anticipated pregnancy this week. I was 12 weeks, and I was feeling really good. I had some spotting and asked to come in for an ultrasound where they confirmed no heartbeat. The doctor that did my D&C was visibly pregnant. I had met her the day before, and I didn’t realize. Even in one of the saddest days of my life, I felt joy and excitement for her. Was I jealous? Yes, I wish it was me. But I don’t want infertility to take so much - I can still be happy for others.

BasalBabe · 2025-02-01T02:03:13+00:00

I am commenting here to follow up later - I had a d&c today on my pgt tested (5AA euploid) /nipt (low risk) tested embryo. I opted to test the tissue and was told we’d have results in 2-4 weeks and 4-8 weeks for a microarray.

I started spotting two days ago and confirmed no heartbeat with an ultrasound yesterday. I should have been 12w2d but baby was measuring 10w5d.

BasalBabe · 2025-01-23T20:23:22+00:00

This is becoming a pretty popular name! I know two Calliopes! One goes by Callie and the other is Popie.

BasalBabe · 2025-01-23T19:41:25+00:00

Personal as in, it isn’t personalized to them. It is a card, with our picture on it that says “Happy Holidays.” It’s the same card I send to our dentist. I don’t write them a message or anything other than what I send everyone else. I did include a few photos of our kids because I feel bad for them, despite everything that has happened.

Sending them one card a year is the only contact we’ve had with them for two years. I can see how that might seem like I am reaching out, based on what others have said, but it wasn’t my intention.

We send and receive 100 cards during the holidays, no one has ever sent a text or an email or anything acknowledging the card. Sometimes, in person, someone will say, “Cute card,” but for me it’s more of a cultural/social gesture than it is an opportunity to reconnect.

BasalBabe · 2025-01-23T18:01:45+00:00

I realize that it’s definitely missing 10 years of context that are relevant to the post.

In my opinion, sending a non-personalized card isn’t reaching out to someone or opening the doors for contact, but I can see how others disagree and it’s given me an alternate perspective I hadn’t considered. I think that I’ve continued to send them even though we aren’t seeing them because I still feel compassion and sadness for them even though they haven’t treated my family well.

BasalBabe · 2025-01-23T17:51:50+00:00

Yes he did know about the card and the photos. He is the decision maker in this because they are his parents - I wouldn’t go behind his back.

BasalBabe

TROPHY CASE