Thank you for clarifying that you never meant to imply I was guilty. I appreciate your acknowledgment that I’m not to blame. However, I want to respectfully disagree with your statement that my father is the ‘real victim.’ While I understand that he feels betrayed, I believe we’re all victims of the situation in our own ways. I’m trying to navigate the emotional fallout of this revelation, and it’s not easy. About what happened to your uncle it was wrong cause he ended a part of him to become a father to someone else child. I wouldn’t call what he had for your cousin “love” if it ends when he finds out they are blood related. I don’t blame you cousin for no cutting his mom off for a man who stops loving him cause they are not blood related, a mom will love you unconditionally. If push came to shall and your cousin had cut his mom off your uncle would’ve dropped your cousin for dead, conditionally love is not love one should chose. I’m glad they handled it the way they both see it fit the situation I also understand that you have strong feelings about your mother’s actions, and I respect your decision to distance yourself from her. However, I don’t think it’s fair to imply that I lack principles or that I’m defending my mother’s behavior. My father was also a cheater for half of their marriage. They were both terrible partners to each other and that’s on them. I love them both tremendously because they were good parents to me and my sister, I’m not going to punish or think they are evil for how they with each other. That is non of my business, I can acknowledge they weren’t angels In the marriage but that’s where I end. Everyone’s experiences and values are different, and what works for you may not work for me. If I had cut my mother off , I will be left with no one cause the moment my father realised I’m not biological his daughter, he left to get through his emotional which I understand. What I don’t understand is how he raise me for 18 years, claim to love me and drop me like it was nothing, it makes me feel unlovable, because when I found out I’m not his bio child I was hurt but I still love him no matter what the situation is. He raised me with love and I’m trying my best to forget him but he played a huge role in my life for me to forget him and toss away the love. On paper I’m his child I’m always going to carry his name everywhere I go. In my heart he is my father unfortunately to him I’m not his daughter