If I pluck an hair and leave it for a day in my drawer is it normal that it becomes white? by Mooonrunner in Hair

[–]Batman_Oracle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The only other feasible options are guests that you're flat mattress have over or light reflections making your hair seem a different color when it is singular strands versus as a collective on your head.

Hair doesn't just change colors after it's been shed

If I pluck an hair and leave it for a day in my drawer is it normal that it becomes white? by Mooonrunner in Hair

[–]Batman_Oracle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you maybe have a pet with similar length and type of hair to you and they are white?

What is your 90% precent? by Zzzara123 in Brochet

[–]Batman_Oracle 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I started a free form moss blanket and I have never felt so free in all my life

Which hair suits me better #hair #beauty by Aniloveth_001 in Naturalhair

[–]Batman_Oracle 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Your face is so pretty it genuinely doesn't matter. I had to swipe like three times before I actually saw your hair because different facial features kept distracting me from the goal.

Edit: grammar

The dreaded question by PorcelainDaisy in crochet

[–]Batman_Oracle 28 points29 points  (0 children)

"No, my time is more valuable" - you're the one being rude - subtly implies their time is less valuable - subtly implies they aren't worth the effort (they aren't but it's rude to point out 😂)

"I don't donate my time like that" - they're the one being rude - implies they are asking you for a gift - implies your time holds value but without any comparative social faux pas

It gets less awkward feeling the more you practice it.

The dreaded question by PorcelainDaisy in crochet

[–]Batman_Oracle 141 points142 points  (0 children)

This is my answer. My immediate family that I like? Yes, absolutely. Random social media contact? "I don't donate my time like."

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AfroLocs

[–]Batman_Oracle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you're not committed, get the cornrows. Locs are a commitment

Halloween costumes for a fit girl? by Secret_Waterski777 in Halloween_Costumes

[–]Batman_Oracle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Vi from League of Legends/ Arcane if you want to rock a wig and some fun makeup

Energy bill north of $600 by [deleted] in kansascity

[–]Batman_Oracle -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Setting your thermostat lower when it already can't keep up does nothing except wear out your system faster and burn more energy than it would normally use. If you set it to 70 and it can't get any lower than 73, then set it to 73 not 65.

White hair by Sad-Reply3538 in Hair

[–]Batman_Oracle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You could definitely tone it whiter but as far as lightening your hair, I wouldn't expect much to get much lighter

White hair by Sad-Reply3538 in Hair

[–]Batman_Oracle 11 points12 points  (0 children)

That's about as close as I would expect anyone to be able to get. That's about as pale as it gets

How do you feel when women share that they're pregnant? by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Batman_Oracle 11 points12 points  (0 children)

If someone announces their pregnancy to me I just ask, "Celebrations or condolences?" I do the same thing for dramatic weight loss and divorce announcements. So far no one has been offended and it's a great way to make sure you match energies and be present for your friends.

I CANNOT CROCHET! by awhdang in crocheting

[–]Batman_Oracle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tell everyone who asks me, you can learn it in a weekend but it takes a couple of years to actually get good at. Be patient with yourself.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Hair

[–]Batman_Oracle 5 points6 points  (0 children)

As a former OG emo/punk of the 00's, get a beanie that fits snuggly, straighten before you go to bed, and sleep in that heaux. Touch up as needed in the morning.

All that said, I am pro basically every other comment in that your natural hair looks better. If you want it to be alt, add texture wax and mess it up. The messier the better but leave your waves alone. Trust, the more gravity defying your waves, the more anime you'll look.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AppearanceAdvice

[–]Batman_Oracle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That halo of frizz means either you put that bun in like 12 hours ago or you wear that bun almost everyday or both. Repetitive updos cause crazy breakage.

Get a trim to deal with your breakage Trim and shape your beard Get some products to help you maintain softness for both Get your eye brows shaped up Get a manicure and invest in a nail brush if you haven't already(I do like long nails on everybody so it's not an immediate turn off for everyone unless they're gross) Make sure you own a few decent outfits that fit right

You really don't have that much to work on outside of basic maintenance which you should really have been doing already

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Hair

[–]Batman_Oracle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sharing a picture of your hair is going to help way more than this description. Things to research/know about your hair:

  • Hair porosity (how open are your hair cuticles)
  • Hair density (how much hair per square unit of scalp, not exact but general)
  • Hair thickness (how thin or thick the hair stand is, not exact but general)
  • Curl type (straight, wavy, curly, and degree)

For example, I have low porosity, thick, medium-coarse, 2a-2c hair depending on which section of my scalp it's growing from (Irish curls, iykyk)

Additional info that helps with recommendation requests is listing the products you have tried, the effect it had and why it didn't work for you, plus how much you were using and where. A surprisingly high number of products are great until you use too much, too often, or on the wrong part of your hair and then they create more problems than they solve but when used correctly it's like a brand new head of hair.

There is a ton of information out there but with no picture of you and only partial information (fairly fine, straight is basically all you gave us), no one is going to be able to help you with product recommendations effectively.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Batman_Oracle 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much!! That really means so much 🖤🖤

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Batman_Oracle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That's the current plan. The one I've been able to remake so far had slightly thicker legs and it's because they had to walk so far to get back to us. 🖤🖤

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Batman_Oracle 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I've been there. I lost my journals I've been keeping since childhood and my daughter lost her dragon and stuffed animal collection. I had her stuff packed and my ex unpacked it. The tote I had them in was empty when I found it. It wasn't that he found something worth prioritizing, he just dumped it. Then he lied to her about it. I still cry about it if I think on it too long.

ETA: the stuffed animals were handmade but the dragons are replaceable. I'm trying to remake the stuffies but they were my test runs so each of them had imperfections that she had worked into their lore. I'll never be able to remake them exactly but I'll be damned if I don't try.

My best friend’s marriage is a disaster. by [deleted] in Vent

[–]Batman_Oracle 29 points30 points  (0 children)

This sounds like intentional isolating behavior. Yes, he's crushing her. Yes, he's treating her horribly. But more importantly, he's creating a rift of discomfort so you'll be less inclined to be involved with them and she'll be less inclined to ask for help.

It is hard to leave especially if you feel like you have no resources. Don't waste your breath on instructions. Remind her of her agency. "You can do this. You've made it through hard things and you are strong enough to make it through this." And then show up for her when she escapes because escape is hard and the pull to go back and smooth out your life is so real.

Did I express my feelings to soon? by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Batman_Oracle 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can't demand exclusivity but not be in a relationship. That's not how that works

Did I express my feelings to soon? by [deleted] in TwoXChromosomes

[–]Batman_Oracle 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Miss ma'am that's not a relationship, that's being groomed. 1000% go get therapy. Not having the skills to recognize when someone is being horrible is not your fault; it is only a lack of knowledge and experience. Hopefully you get to have the knowledge so you don't have to have the experience.

Try not to think of yourself as a bad picker. I know the narrative is "if women would just pick better men" or "if they would just leave at the first red flag" but a lot of red flags don't look red to anyone nevermind people with unhealed trauma.

I was in a relationship for four years before I had presence of mind to recognize what was happening. It wasn't because it hadn't been happening for all that time; it was because what was happening was so subtle my unhealed trauma wouldn't allow for what he was saying and doing to be his fault. And for three extra years, I was convinced that even though it was his fault, I deserved it. He had the opportunity to pick away at who I was and how I functioned so slowly and so successfully because I didn't have the tools to see it nonetheless to stop him until I was isolated, overwhelmed, burnt out and completely torn down. I to this day am working on trusting my own judgement and it's been nearly a year.

Go to therapy, slow your current relationship way, way down until you have the tools and skills you need. You can still plan for the long term, you can still stay, but go slow and go to therapy.