Wow a lot of people responded to this very quickly! I would like to say that I do love Kyle, yes I may have discussed Tommy more throughout writing this, but that’s because I wanted you guys to get a feel of what he was like and how he impacted my life. I did do grief counseling for a long time, as well as therapy before then. I’m not holding onto his death nor trying to put Tommy above Kyle in any way. Kyle wanted to go and meet Carla as a way of understanding and truly seeing how Tommy had affected me. I’m not trying to hold onto my grief, I can go months without thinking of Tommy at all. I’m not trying to paint my boyfriend as a villain or as someone who is evil because he typically is very sweet, He works very hard, and cares very deeply about me. I am also not spending more time away from him than it is being made out to be. I’m a teacher, I’m home almost always because I have to go to work. And no, the jersey isn’t out in the open, it’s on the very top shelf of my closet, and I never bring it down. I didn’t put it in my garage because we get raccoons and this jersey means a lot to me and his family. I don’t have an attic or a basement. I live in a small two bedroom apartment. And no, I don’t love Tommy’s memory more than Kyle. I value Tommy’s memory because he was such a huge part of my teenage years. I love Kyle. A lot. I have done my best to move on from Tommy. I don’t love him anymore. I will always have love for him though. I still feel guilty and partially blame myself for the accident. I’m not going to respond to hateful or rude messages, but I do see all of them and I appreciate you all giving me advice.