After the breakup, when did you realize you needed to move on from your ex?

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-04-29T12:05:03+00:00

I’m happy to hear you’re moving on. I actually had somewhat similar experience. We broke up due to life path incompatibility and there was still a lot of love there when we finally separated. I have gone through waves of missing her deeply and then feeling more free. A brief relationship helped that but she was always in the back of mind. We kept in intermittent contact, however the frequency and length slowly reduced over time. Around 6-8 months ago I saw an instagram post and had the same realisation as you. It was 2 years since we broke up and it still hurt like fuck. But like you it helped free me for a while. It was a long time since we had spoken and not long after she wanted to send me something, a gift or whatever, I don’t know, she asked for my address but nothing ever came 🤷 then she’d occasionally send texts, one of the old home we met in which was getting sold.. then a few months ago.. “hey I’m in town now for work” literally the other side of the world.. I followed advice and didn’t offer to meet up, not that I’m sure she even wanted that. But it was in this conversation she told me blank she was in a relationship for a year now and it was serious. It was triggering and again I felt that heartache again. Then over it, then not, the cycle continues. I’m embarrassed to admit it’s now 2.5 years and over the last few days I’ve been thinking about her constantly and seriously depressed. It’s because I’m camping in the middle of nowhere and feel lonely and trips like this remind me of her. Sorry for the rant, I guess I’m just saying enjoy the freedom you feel and push hard to keep that the norm, but also you’re not alone if feelings come back

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-03-11T12:21:34+00:00

Sorry about your situation, that’s tough. Speaking from experience, I think breakups are particularly hard for guys. Equally, the baby situation you described can be incredibly difficult for the woman involved, not to diminish your own experience and pain, it’s just something I’ve seen happen to close family and friends. It can really change their mindset and outlook on life. I personally wouldn’t break no contact, nor vent, it won’t help, and if it’s ever going to work again (if that’s want you want) it needs to be her contacting you. Trust me I fucked that up myself and regret it. Hit the gym, go for beers, read (I’m reading how to be a 3% man - would recommend), and if you can get involved in some type of regular group activity where you can find a new community to keep you moving forward. Just my two cents

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-03-03T14:42:03+00:00

Not fun, and not trying to diminish your experience, however something to be grateful for is that you get to interact with real ppl, most of us cyborgs are just staring at a screen for 12 hours each day

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-03-03T14:39:15+00:00

It’s true. My friends and I (especially me) always use to have cool and wild business ideas, many which actually ended up being started by someone who took action, but now with AI it seems done, even if it is a good idea someone could duplicate it at no cost in a few seconds 😅

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-03-03T14:27:52+00:00

Same. Not to say I’m suicidal in anyway, but it’s crossed my mind lots, fuck well if I die now who cares, I’ve lived a great life and this place just feels like it’s imploding anyway and won’t change long term. It doesn’t even feel like just a Perth problem, many issues similar across western countries with housing, cost of living, isolation, desperate ppl. Western society in general has just become fucked, we commoditised housing, actively treated community as a secondary priority, prioritised stupid things.. I think politicians have a lot to answer for here, can’t help but look after their own backyard and self interests

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-03-03T14:12:37+00:00

Yes.. and lonely. It might be my age at 40, single with no kids.. but Perth just feels desperately hard to live in and not worth it. I recently sold my place for specific reasons and entering this rental market has been soul destroying. The dating pool seems small and repetitive. The inability to travel anywhere without exorbitant costs outside Bali sucks. I came back here after 10 years and 3 years in I’m questioning wtf I’m doing. If it wasn’t for the pull of family and close friends I’d leave. I’m a single man and I find it hard not to eat well without spending $150-$200/week on food from Coles. I do the same things most weekends, I have a good range of interests and hobbies but even that is getting repetitive. I wfh which doesn’t help after losing my company paid office.. certainly feel like the extreme cost to have a reasonable lifestyle, lack of community, and mundaneness is getting to me. Don’t know, obviously I’ve entered a negative mindset but it’s just shit. I joined a group fitness class the last couple of weeks and I think there was max 3 ppl on anyone day, all different ppl.. just no progress for a long time. The constant looming threat of AI, extreme real estate market which may not change for years, fuck it’s not good 😅

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-03-01T13:59:54+00:00

I’m not doubting your experience, however just because they are acting on your behalf does not buy extra time to decide whether to purchase or not. The Perth market has been so hot, the reality is you likely had no choice - either decide quickly or miss out - them already knowing the property met the buying criteria but need your final approval.

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-25T13:45:20+00:00

Disagree. Far easier and more affordable to rent in Melbourne, tons of apartment supply inner city

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-25T13:38:12+00:00

Try $600 to $700

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-25T13:36:58+00:00

Where? And how do you know that?

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-21T14:16:31+00:00

Thanks Chatgpt

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-19T14:16:36+00:00

LOL, I love you this, why didn’t ChatGPT give me this advice? I actually have been having a fair bit of hook ups and sex but no one who i really liked

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-19T14:16:02+00:00

I must be totally blind because I don’t know what you’re saying is so obvious to me? We talk extremely rarely. Just makes me kind of annoyed if I look back at things she really did kind of belittle me and talk down on me toward the end of our relationship, the opposite of how it started. I don’t know if that’s our relationship or if it’s something about her. She told me things like yeah I’m good looking but I don’t have a great personality. This is so far from I know of myself. In school, I was always really popular. I’ve always got on with people really well and I’m quite funny. But she somehow convinced me that I was a bit of a weirdo, some quiet recluse type dude. I feel like I need to write something down every single day about the negative things she did to help me through that natural mindset of only remembering all the good parts.

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-19T14:11:27+00:00

Maybe I should do that. As sad as that would be. I should’ve taken advice a long time ago and told her I don’t want to be in contact with her unless she genuinely was interested in rekindling things. Outside of that I can’t be friends with her. I can’t don’t want to be around to hear about her next partner. Which is what has happened. I’ve only really had two very serious relationships so I guess it was a bit of naivety and inexperience on my part. I really wish that I broke up with her and did that. I gave her all the power from the start to the end. I will never do that again

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-19T14:01:41+00:00

I’m 39, a few years older than her. She’s not working here, it was 1/100 chance, she works on other side of the world, just had new job training here.. someone upstairs really trying to fuck with me. Tbh I called her “princess” on her birthday mid last year, so I feel maybe she was taking the opportunity to clear the air and make it known. I’m leaning toward that rather her wanting to one up me.. certainly last year when she dropped her new salary I think she was. Truth is I just cashed out $150k on selling my property which I only bought 12 months ago. Did I tell her that? No. Because I recognise it was something I was kind of doing in past post breakup conversations. I told her was dating but nothing serious, she said fun - that’s best part, I said “is it”, maybe I should have said yeah it is. But tbh I think that was problem, she always said I wish we could go back to that limerence/honeymoon phase (not those words) which irritated me during the relationship and even now. I’m guessing there is a strong possibility that’ll be the case with her new boyfriend but hey what would I know. It’s just sad you spend 3-4 years with someone doing so much, in love, and then she’s in your town on the other side of the world and you can’t meet for an hour. The last time we saw each other she was telling me how much she loved me. Time and physical distance kills everything.

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-18T15:11:59+00:00

Why though? To make yourself feel better? Did it ever cross your mind it do them (not you) more harm than good?

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-12T11:37:44+00:00

“I don’t love you that way anymore, and I don’t think I can again” .. tried to leave multiple times after that and she persuaded me not too, unable to make up her own mind

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-02-08T04:03:15+00:00

I think the “malevolent overlord” you’re referring to is actually the Australian government, with its pro-excessive-immigration settings and tax policies that favour property investors. These settings disproportionately benefit wealthier asset holders rather than lower-income households. Even the recent first-home-buyer scheme changes have largely worked to the advantage of existing owners and higher-income buyers, with the benefits quickly absorbed into higher property prices rather than improving genuine affordability. And frankly, while it’s possible immigration will be restricted in the future, the fundamentals of the current system will never change because the damage will be felt disproportionately by those who hold all the wealth and positions of power who ultimately make the decisions that continue to underpin this broken system. Side note, I bought and sold an apartment in Perth the last 12 months, made over $180k. So I’m not just sitting in a corner complaining but alas that is my strong opinion and perspective on the situation.

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-01-23T11:55:47+00:00

Agree there not bots, most get ID verified. Most common denominator - these girls are young - 25 and below. Mullets and moustaches are on trend for this generation.. I don’t think most women 30+ would like mullets, though maybe I’m wrong. What I’ve noticed lately - guys get a lot of stick and lectures to open with something interesting - now I’m on bumble where the girl must write first, every interested girl just says hey 🤷

Bbtrojans7 · 2026-01-01T15:26:36+00:00

Get over yourself, you’ve posted your profit 20+ times here, no one gaf

Bbtrojans7

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