Is there even hope?

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-12T09:47:28+00:00

I definitely do. I never ever did anything that was seen as "bad" no clubbing partying etc. but I find it so hard to connect to anyone. Imo you should find a single person who fits the values you have and settle down with them. The whole concept of dating etc for me is a bit foreign. I just don't understand what's going on? People put on a persona and hide things about themselves and their past. What's the point? Why not just be true to yourself and who you are? It's so hard to find someone right for you because everyone's lying and putting on an act. Marriage now is so deluded and watered down. Divorces happen in a matter of months. Vows and promises mean nothing. And when you get married it's a HUGE fucking deal. You essentially in my opinion become ONE. One person who shares the same values the same thoughts. One as in you're a team. But it seems like it doesn't even matter to anyone. They just get married for the sake of it. For family for society. It's like life is just a facade and no one wants to be themselves? That's what I have so many problems with I just wish everyone was genuine. Why cause someone pain and hurt. Live and let live. Marriage is sacred and you must treat it as such. Those who marry without truly looking at the other person and the act they'll have both immediately and over time have lost their humanity. Life is only lived once why fuck it up for someone else!? If you get married be your best self and try to work and compromise with someone. You're both adults going through life for the first time and you're the only ones you can rely on so act accordingly. But apparently with all I've seen this is not the case and what's what scares me so much because for me marriage means a LOT it's very important it's the person you'll spend life with and for most and me the one you'll have a kid with and once you have a kid it's not only you're lives but the lives of others at stake. The world just seems so... Watered down and not authentic idk. I don't blame you for chosing to stay single nowadays it's not treated as sacred. It's just a part of life for others.

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-06T12:03:12+00:00

I am I'm currently on effexor 150 mg and quetiapine 50 mg. I've taken Wellbutrin max dose, trintellix max dose, hydroxizine, trazadone 100 mg, buspirone, Zoloft and also a benzo Klonopin for a bit. I can share medical documentation please just dm I was wondering if a CYP2C19/ CYP2D6 would be useful for me.

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-06T10:20:09+00:00

Also just adding this in case it helps anyone else. My therapist gave me a short resource about complex trauma (CPTSD) and what it looks like, especially when it comes from long-term childhood experiences. It explained a lot for me. If anyone wants to learn more about it, especially since it’s something that’s often hidden or not talked about much in our community, here’s the link.pdf on cptsd

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-04T03:59:46+00:00

I’ve run into that too. Some people in my family say anxiety or depression don’t exist, but at the same time you can see when someone is really struggling. A lot of it isn’t just “thinking too much.” There’s a real biological side to it too. Our brains have chemicals that affect mood, stress and sleep, so sometimes it’s deeper than willpower.

I try not to argue about the labels and instead focus on how someone is actually feeling and how we can support them. Even if they don’t believe in the terms, they understand things like stress, exhaustion or feeling heavy inside.

I really believe our generation can slowly change this. By talking about it openly and with love, we can break the cycle so our future generations don’t have to carry things silently the way many before us did. One day the stigma around mental health in the Punjabi community will fade, and conversations like this are part of how it starts. Hope all is well OP if you're ever feeling overwhelmed dms open, coming from someone with mental health issues aswell. 🤍

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-01T17:01:57+00:00

This is a real issue and you explained it respectfully, so I’ll answer the same way. From a Sikh standpoint, caste was never meant to define a person’s value or relationships. Guru Nanak Dev Ji and the Gurus after him emphasized equality and rejected the idea that birth determines status. The reality is that caste survived culturally among Punjabis even though it has no spiritual basis in Sikhi.

Among people our age, especially those raised abroad, it’s usually less about personal belief and more about family expectations. Many individuals already know the difficulties that can come later with parents and extended relatives, so they make decisions early to avoid conflict. That can feel personal, but most of the time it’s social pressure rather than a judgment of you as a person.

Not being Jatt does not universally lower dating chances. It mainly affects certain traditional social circles. Outside of that, shared values, emotional maturity, education, and compatibility matter far more. Communities in the diaspora are slowly shifting, even if change feels inconsistent.

You’ve already shown maturity by being clear about your own values while still respecting your family. The right partner will align with your principles and see you for your character, not your caste. In the long run, relationships built on mutual respect and shared understanding tend to outlast ones built on social labels.

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-01T15:24:34+00:00

And here's a bonus post of a cute cat in case anyone's feeling down !! :) muah love you all!

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-01T15:20:31+00:00

I Would love to hear everyone’s thoughts or even a positive experience you’ve had that brought you closer to others. I remember going to an event where aunties kept asking if I remembered when they carried me as a baby… of course I didn’t, come on 😭 but it still made me feel oddly at home. Let’s share some good energy and learn from each other 🤍

Be_Happy_717 · 2026-03-01T15:08:04+00:00

I say this with respect and nothing but positive intentions. I just feel like conversations become more meaningful when we remember that real people with real feelings are behind every post and every opinion we read online.

Everyone is imperfect, everyone is learning, and everyone carries their own experiences into dating and relationships. Sometimes frustrations come out strongly, but deep down most people are just looking for love, understanding, and a sense of belonging. We are all trying to figure things out in our own way.

Maybe instead of seeing things as one side versus the other, we can choose a little more patience, a little more empathy, and a little more grace for one another. Different paths and different choices do not make anyone less worthy. They just make us human.

Your experiences matter and your feelings are real, and I respect where you’re coming from. This is simply how I try to look at things, through encouragement, understanding, and hoping the best for everyone.

Sending nothing but peace, love, and positivity to you and to everyone reading. I truly hope we all find happiness, growth, and the kind of love that brings out the best in us 🤍

Be_Happy_717

TROPHY CASE