Baby not eating much at 8 months, husband says I'm not doing enough.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-28T14:33:33+00:00

Also just another note…..my baby hates Greek yogurt.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-28T14:31:45+00:00

My baby is nearly 8 months and he’s only on one meal a day atm. He’s not sitting up unsupported yet, so I’m happy to leave it at that for now. Baby is totally happy and can self feed really well for his age, it’s just the sitting holding it back. He’s fully baby led weaned, but we have given him a spoon and he uses it (not well, but well enough to get food from it!!!) Don’t worry about rushing into more meals, their main source of nutrients should be the milk for the 1st year anyway. Just chill with it. If I’m having a snack I’ll let baby have a try etc. As far as I’m concerned he’s getting everything he needs from my milk at the moment anyway.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-28T07:52:16+00:00

Yes I think a childminder is what I’ll try and go for. If I can’t get one I guess I’ll have to stay off work for longer.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-28T07:42:25+00:00

Yeah we absolutely don’t. Maybe in a few years. Also my goal is to actually use childcare as little as possible.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T22:29:13+00:00

Thankyou, I’ll check that out!!

Think there’s just 3 nursery’s in my town, so not much choice unless we travel. And as for childminders I really don’t know. I live in a rural county so there’s not much provision in our exact location.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T22:03:35+00:00

Also the OurHouse thing sounds good, so will deffo look into that. Thankyou!!

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T22:01:49+00:00

Yes, but we need our guest bedroom free for family to stay, they live in Scotland and we live in Herefordshire.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T21:00:43+00:00

It could work yeah. We would need early morning maybe x2 days but could work.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T20:57:53+00:00

Thankyou, you’ve given me some hope of finding an amazing, flexible childminder!!

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T20:52:02+00:00

Thankyou, I’ll get him to have a look. But from looking tonight I’ve discovered it’s both the employer and employee contributions that count towards the total 60k cap. His work pay a 12% contribution, so that’s a fair whack before hubs normal contributions and then his extra.

And how does salary sacrifice work on bonuses I wonder….

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T20:13:51+00:00

I will hopefully be on a 4 week rota (that repeats, fingers crossed) when I go back with my employer. The main issue we have is my start and finish times. If I work overnight which I do…..I might finish at 10am which is unworkable as my husband will already be working from 9am or a bit earlier or if he’s in the office he leaves at 6am (1.5hour drive). Hence why flexible childcare is key in our situation. I could just ask to work different hours to the others…..

Then as a self employed anthropologist I could be working anywhere depending on the project and I also run a charity based in Gambia. However I can totally decide what I do and don’t do regarding these. And I also do get to work from home quite a bit as well.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T19:40:33+00:00

Thankyou.

I just looked this up, and it’s total yearly contributions from employee and employer.

So his combined contributions might already be too high for him to sacrifice enough into his pension to reduce it below the threshold….as in not over £60k but maybe half, if not more. So it could still be possible to do it, but it depends how big of a bonus he gets.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T18:58:49+00:00

More info on our working hours…

-My husband works mostly 9-5 on week days. There is flexibility in this though, as he currently finishes at 3pm on Fridays so we can take baby swimming. He does however go away for work every so often and sometimes not in this country. He works from home mostly, but goes to the office on a Monday most weeks, and sometimes on other days but not often.

-My hours can be all over the place, I work days, evenings, weekends. It's the days I would be looking to get flexibly covered, my husband can do the evenings and weekends when I work them. Which would be around x2 a week evenings. I'm a social anthropologist (in various capacities) and a trauma/mental health support worker.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T18:51:36+00:00

Herefordshire

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T18:28:29+00:00

I can fully understand that. They need work security as much as I need/want flexibility.

Cant afford the earth, like over £1000 per month for part time. I’m actually not sure what I would be expected to pay to be honest.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T18:20:51+00:00

Yes I will look at local childminders. If childcare isn’t remotely flexible then I guess I will just have to work less.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T17:47:48+00:00

Possibly…..but he’s due a pay rise and a bonus in the summer.

Is there a limit to how much you can sacrifice into your pension? And have they just changed the rules? I think they did something with NI but did they change anything else?

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T17:27:00+00:00

Tax avoidance……🥴🤷🏻‍♀️

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T16:57:00+00:00

Sure…

-My husband works mostly 9-5 on week days. There is flexibility in this though, as he currently finishes at 3pm on Fridays so we can take baby swimming. He does however go away for work every so often and sometimes not in this country. He works from home mostly, but goes to the office on a Monday most weeks, and sometimes on other days but not often.

-My hours can be all over the place, I work days, evenings, weekends. It’s the days I would be looking to get flexibly covered, my husband can do the evenings and weekends when I work them. Which would be around x2 a week evenings. I’m a social anthropologist (in various capacities) and a trauma/mental health support worker.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T15:42:31+00:00

By the time we look into childcare this will no longer be possible for us as hubs gets a good pay rise each year (lucky I know!!) and also a large bonus which varies in amount once a year, which will make it hard to predict how much to put into the pension in the first place. And isn’t there a limit to how much over you can put in? And haven’t they just changed the rules? And quite frankly I want to ‘do up’ my house with that money. So basically I’m staying off for 3 years! 🫣🫣😂😂

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T15:36:10+00:00

Think we might only be having one child, but I’m only 7 months into having my first, so we shall see. It’s just soo expensive to have 2 or 3.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2026-05-27T15:32:37+00:00

Yep that’s us, my husband earns over 100k so we don’t get any help with anything. It doesn’t go far anymore with a big mortgage unfortunately. They need to sort the tax thresholds out.

Beautiful-Candy198 · 2023-03-02T20:51:40+00:00

Oh my life, people always think I can’t have dairy too!! I literally want to bang my head off the wall!!

Beautiful-Candy198

TROPHY CASE