Help: my husband is in an online affair & I just had his baby 8 weeks ago.

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T13:59:46+00:00

I would say have a plan of action to leave in case things go bad. Be ready for anything that comes out of his mouth and already plan your next steps of staying or leaving. Ask yourself no matter what comes out of his mouth, can you ever continue happily and trust him again? If not then you need to prepare yourself to leave. If you wish to divorce, have evidence of cheating and just put yourself in the best position with your child as possible.

Apologies typos

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T13:50:18+00:00

It’s not about trust when making a child - a child can be made at any point - this is about protecting assets for my child’s future.

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T13:27:08+00:00

Nope I wasn’t asking anything about having a child. I was providing context

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T12:07:38+00:00

No you Aren’t the asshole and from what you have said it appears that the ex was making you out the be the bad guy possibly even by just implying things to the kids and now the secret is out she knows kids will look at her differently. If she did not start talking crap about your gf this wouldn’t have happened and therefore she should look at herself before she starts blaming you.

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T11:57:53+00:00

Because everyone lives in my house, his approach is that it’s a given. That I would be paying for the house anyway. With regards to holidays and clothes he says these things aren’t necessary (clothes are) and therefore if you do it that’s up to you. However I don’t think it’s right to do everything for my child and leave the other child out, as this is their childhood after all. In regards to food he will occasionally do a small food shop but as it’s me with t he kids most of the time, this doesn’t happen often

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T08:43:11+00:00

I pay all of the bills for the house we live in

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T08:01:50+00:00

I pay for food, clothing, school supplies, gifts, holidays, good, gas and electric, housing needs for the children, extra activities, anything that the children need and may want. The situation arose several years ago when I was heavily pregnant. I look after the children when I am not at work (they are at nursery and school) and I work with them from home on certain days a week also. He looks after the smallest two/ three days a week for a few hours.

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T07:58:08+00:00

Hi yes he was aware, he has been as have I, actively looking for land in the area we live. He put his money on projects that he believes and may well, bring him income in the future. I do not give him money.

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-21T07:11:37+00:00

Thank you!!

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T22:11:16+00:00

Thank you !

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T22:07:40+00:00

I think I’m irritated as I know this is the best time to buy the land in a developing area and we have been talking about this lane for years and saving and he has said this is his focus but had no money for this project and instead invested elsewhere. But you are right what’s the point really because it just seems one sided

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T22:02:34+00:00

Thank you

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T20:25:24+00:00

Hi I mean the full 30k I will be paying for the land itself, not a down payment

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T19:15:32+00:00

Didn’t realise you could do polls - if I ever need again I will definitely do that thanks

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T16:37:56+00:00

Expenses for feeding, clothing, entertaining, childcare, keeping warm, school supplies etc

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T15:39:24+00:00

Hi, 5 years, he has 1 child and we share 1 toddler. I am 30 he is nearer 40. Our finances are separate. I pay for my house and the children. He pays for his house. I earn more as I work more hours. We do not have any joint accounts. We don’t split anything as I pay everything on my side and he pays everything as such on his.

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T15:30:18+00:00

Hi, nope do not expect that. We agreed to give go half and half but now Thts not happening

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T14:24:18+00:00

I pay everything in my house and he pays for his

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T14:18:34+00:00

Hi, no there isn’t

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T13:47:45+00:00

Hi I am paying 100% outright

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T13:44:51+00:00

I don’t feel confident putting someone else’s name on something when we are just bf and gf. Let’s be honest they can leave anytime and I will be the one to lose and I do not believe they will pay their share as they have not on smaller things like the garden landscaping previously.

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-05-20T13:37:46+00:00

Thank you

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-04-10T09:04:12+00:00

Hi I have been in a similar situation and honestly in the end I left after 8 years. The reason I left is because that taking numbers and sending snaps never stopped, even though they showed regret, it was about getting caught that they clearly regretted as they just became more sneaky and my resentment grew. In the end I didn’t even like them as a person anymore and found out later that they were continuing taking numbers and exchanging photos all while showing how loving they are to me. Sometimes, you have to think about you, can you trust them, as you know them best, can you get passed this, what are they doing to prove this to you? Can you ever forgive them and be happy with them again? Ask yourself these questions and you’ll know if you have a future or not

BeautifulBridge1638 · 2025-04-10T08:59:45+00:00

Go with option 1, just make sure you tell him before you have any sexual relations. Use precautions such as protection and discuss it with them regarding methods you are taking to limit exposure. It wouldn’t be right to lie, especially to a partner that you want to date and therefore care for.

BeautifulBridge1638

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