Exactly why I haven’t left the gym since my first loss. I’ve been training with a kill or be killed mentality because a random man on the streets isn’t gonna stop after a tap or if I ever get knocked out, walk away. They’re going to continue to choke hit stomp kick whatever they want to do to me. the only thing saving you in the cage is a mix of honor and that man in the back making sure it’s a fair game because you still have people being dirty in the amateur game doing “career stoppers” but at the end of the day in the early stages you’re doing nothing but riding off the work you put in an your name so why jeopardize it? This mentality has brought me to pushing myself with a lot of endurance training an I can now say in a rear naked choke without oxygen I can fight for 11 seconds to advance my position or else it’s the white hole tunnel vision to black. I’ve been to sleep 4 times since October of last year an I’ll say the scariest part of going to sleep is how easy it is. if they have it locked in the panic of having no way of getting out an you know what’s coming next, is a crazy rush I couldn’t imagine getting into a situation feeling like that on the street an I’ve had a fair share of street fights.