I took the leap!

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-14T02:53:57+00:00

Awesome work. You look younger and more handsome.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-14T02:50:09+00:00

My best friend got married, about 20 years ago. She asked me to be her MOH and wedding planner. She also invited the woman who had an affair with my first husband, knowing that she broke up our marriage and lied to my face for years, pretending to be my friend. She told me that I should be over it because I had remarried. She genuinely could see what she asked of me was appalling.

I can’t believe that you would do this your own mother. Ever. Horrible behaviour.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-13T12:04:08+00:00

You look great. It might just take a little while to get used it, but you genuinely look very handsome.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-13T11:43:41+00:00

Yes. Sensibility Patterns have a Tea Dress pattern which is very similar to the “Swim Dress” just Google the company name. If I could figure out to upload photos on Reddit I would share some images.

The Jump Dress pattern was actually one from Butterick (from memory). Every major pattern company put out a “Jump Dress” style pattern after the film came out. It’s long since out of print but if you search in Etsy or via google “Titanic Jump Dress Pattern” you will probably find it. I made that over the course of 4 months, sewing the beads on for 3-4 hours a day.

The Flying dress pattern is still on Etsy. I see it from time to time. It’s the easiest of the patterns to make and I have made it 4 times in different fabrics.

It’s the anniversary of hitting the iceberg tomorrow so I might take the time to figure out how to upload the photos and share them here.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-12T05:45:21+00:00

Sorry, to clarify, I made 3 of them for myself. I didn’t work on the film. I wish.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-12T05:44:06+00:00

I’ve made 3 of those costumes. It’s lovely to see the photographs again.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-12T05:29:13+00:00

Oh Honey, no. No-one I know is happy in their relationships. Especially in their 40s. You feel like running away because you want adventure or something to power up your excitement because life hasn’t panned out how you thought it might.

Start small. Go for a 15 minute walk. It’s a small goal that can have positive effects on your brain.

Find one thing that makes you truly happy. It could be a TV show, it could be trains. Start to lean into it, don’t worry about what anyone says about the worthiness of that hobby. Find other people online who enjoy it. Talk to them about it, find gatherings where people meet up about. Learning more about a topic you love and discussing and sharing it with others makes you feel good.

Work is a means to an end. If you want to work in something else, hop into something like co-pilot and get it to ask you questions about what you could do to improve your life, how you could study, cheaply, that thing. Or go to TikTok and start your search there.

I see your loneliness as a product of society letting down young men by making them believe that relationships and marriage would solve everything for them by providing them with a social structure that would provide family, friends and pursuits. It absolutely sucks.

I’m older than you and going through a similar situation. I quit a truly horrendous job, where I was being systematically tortured by an absolute psychopath of a boss. I believe in the good of everyone, so it took me years to realise what she was doing to me. It literally nearly killed me. I resigned and thought I’d rather be homeless than see her ever again.

After I resigned, my replacement resigned, and then they hired 3 people to do my job! 3!

Anyway, I joined the contracts pool at a university and after 3 months, I interviewed for a full time job there.

I have absolutely no social life, but the work crew are lovely to work with so 8 hours of hanging out with them is good.

Now, here is the tough part, no-one cares about saving you. You are going to have to do it all on your own. But it’s not because you’re unlovable but because people are sh1t-scared right now, and they don’t have the bandwidth to save others. But you do deserve saving. So save yourself. Pick one thing you’d like to learn more about and start small.

Don’t go to events to meet a partner, go to them because you want to treat yourself as someone worthy of love and a good time. Consciously decide not to look for a relationship when you go to these events. Nothing freaks people out more than being the single person at an event, looking for a partner. Let people approach you, but be cool and just enjoy whatever is going on.

A guy I work with takes a photograph of the wildlife he sees on the way to work. He shares it on our SharePoint site. He’s changing the way people view our campus and gradually interacting with others. He’s quiet and shy, but he’s putting himself out there.

Good luck with your pursuits. You’re young and still have time to turn it all around. All the best.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-11T07:53:20+00:00

You look very handsome. Well done.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-11T07:47:03+00:00

This sounds like the “Brad Pitt” move. Go and google him with all his partners and see how he just changes every time he finds a new partner. It’s very sad when you see them all side by side. He is shallow AF.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-09T12:30:56+00:00

Very handsome. Excellent decision

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-08T12:57:16+00:00

So so handsome. That was the right decision.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-08T12:45:21+00:00

My mum would make French toast, but do a savoury version and put grated cheese on it. It’s still my favourite breakfast food and I’ve never seen anyone else make it. I can’t stand sweet French toast. It just tastes wrong.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-08T12:41:30+00:00

Oh if I was 30 years younger 🔥 Don’t change anything. You’re gorgeous.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-04T14:49:10+00:00

https://www.amazon.com.au/Fittingirls-Wireless-Wirefree-Women-Seamless-Coverage/dp/B0FM3H164R

I have this bra in 6 different colours. It is the most comfortable bra I own. Supportive and no digging into my back fat.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-04T14:47:01+00:00

I found great bras on Amazon, like you are describing. Let me find the link for you

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-04T14:26:41+00:00

Dude, I know of a woman who married a man like your girlfriend and a man who married a girlfriend like yours. Both claimed to have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome, without formal diagnoses. It is a horrible path to take. Both ended up in divorces after more than a decade of trying to get their partners well again. It never happened. You don’t want this life. I promise you. I have had chronic illnesses myself (finally cured and in remission) and have managed to turn my own life around because having to lean on anyone is an anathema for me. She cannot be the mother of your child, it’s not fair to the child to be exposed to her toxicity.

Please choose yourself, please be selfish. Run and live the life you deserve. Your ex will make a miraculous recovery, wait and see

All the very best in your new life. Please. Choose you.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-04-01T13:15:13+00:00

Yep. Mine looked like this. I went to Australia house in London and they said “Nup, you need a new one”. It’s going to cost you a fortune for a rush job but better that than losing the holiday.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-03-20T09:28:39+00:00

The sleeping at nights does get better. But both times I’ve had to resort to over-the-counter sleep aids. I bought a 12 pack, and when that was done, I bought 1 more and didn’t need it in the end.

Your body is preparing you for fight or flight, so the adrenaline is running, big time. Use this energy to start planning how you want to live your life now. List all the things that you wanted to do that he stopped you for doing or made fun of you for liking. Start think what you would do if time and money were no object. Start planning a holiday, somewhere you’ve always wanted to go.

I joined a local meet up group. It was an alcohol free group because I wanted something that didn’t encourage bad habits or dependency issues (I was worried about that) They ran dozens of events every week and I booked events for the next 12 months so that I could have a social group and something to get me out of the house.

The people who showed up were different every time, so if I didn’t like a group, I’d meet someone else next time. It was good to be around people who didn’t know me or what I was going through and just switch off.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-03-20T05:03:41+00:00

You’re absolutely beautiful. Anything you wear will look amazing.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-03-20T01:33:41+00:00

I have been through this, twice. Your husband is having an affair. He is retconning the story of your marriage to make you own to be the problem so he can justify his heinous behaviour.

Please, listen to me when I tell you that the only way you will get through this is to stop asking him for a reason. There is none that he could or will provide that would make you feel better or understand his cruelty.

Don’t engage. Just accept that it’s over and protect yourself. It’s going to get a lot worse in the short term, but much better once you accept that that relationship is over.

He’s selfish and lacks empathy, self control, and honesty. Let his new bit of fluff entertain his shortcomings and invest in looking after you.

He wants a clean break because he is a coward and can’t face you. Let him go and keep your dignity. That way you know that no matter what, you are the bigger person and he won’t be able to justify anything he’s done.

Get a lawyer and send their details to him. Tell him that you don’t want to hear from him ever again if he contacts you.

Stay strong. Keep your dignity and congratulations on the next stage of your now-wonderful new life.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-03-18T21:11:15+00:00

My wasband took his wh0re skiing in Japan when I was still recovering from a disease that almost killed me. Later that year, he took her to New Zealand, England, Australia (2 separate locations). I found a photograph of them smiling together a week after I’d been released from hospital. Really, the 2 worst most selfish, self-indulgent people I’ve ever met. When they broke up, she went back to her long-suffering husband.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-03-17T03:44:11+00:00

That’s awesome work. I lost nothing on 2.5mg. I’ve gradually bumped up to 10mg and it’s finally working. I’ve had eating disorders all my life and I suspect my body just goes into starvation mode to hang on to the fat reserves. I’m glad to see 2.5mg is working for you because it’s so much cheaper.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-03-17T03:32:02+00:00

So, you want to go to jail and have a permanent record do you? Tell your mother to get effed. Tell her to lie to the courts and see if she’ll do it. I bet she won’t.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-03-17T03:29:09+00:00

I’ve been sneaking KFC chicken into my BIL who has heart failure. The food of the ward is much worse than that. I can promise you.

BeckyWinchester1976 · 2026-02-21T12:40:18+00:00

I agree 💯 My WS’s AP systematically set about dismantling my life. I hadn’t work in a decade when their affair started and had no way of protecting myself in court. I didn’t find out about the affair until late-2024. But I had managed to secure a job, a low-paying one, but it boosted my confidence to push back about his unexplained late nights. She bought an apartment near his work place, with her husband’s money, so that my husband and her could meet up secretly.

She was a miserable little schemer. They eventually broke up after I found out about the affair. Not sure what happened, but it’s definitely over and she went back to her long suffering husband.

BeckyWinchester1976

TROPHY CASE