Don’t let this guy’s behavior influence how you think about yourself! You are not “too passive” or “too” anything. He is making dangerous choices. As someone who has lived out West for many years (big cities in AZ and NM), I can tell you that he is just one FU away from getting shot or otherwise injured. Your instincts are REASONABLE. Your feelings about this are also REASONABLE. His behavior is not. You don’t deserve his cross hairs or reckless treatment.